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Author Topic: Worst jokes EVER!
Omni Craig
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Did you hear about the tailor who lost touch with reality? He couldn't shake the feeling that nothing was it seams.

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Craig C.

- Time travel stories are told in chronillogical order.

From: Santa Ana, CA | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Future
The Present is Past
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What does a dyslexic cow say?

OOM!

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Suddenly Seymour
Don't feed the plant!
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What's the coldest kind of carpet?

Berber

(I made that one up myself! My aunt says I should send it to Reader's Digest. I think she's just being nice.)

Eric

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Geek Watch

From: Standing beside you in Ferndale, MI | Registered: Aug 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Sonnie
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my youngest neice's favourite right now is---

q) what do you call a sleeping cow?

a) a bulldozer!

I'm so proud of her!

From: home sweet home... unless i'm posting from work | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Semi Transparent Fellow
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More Helen Keller (really old ones):

Why did Helen Keller play the piano with only one hand?
Because she sang with the other.

Helen Keller fell down the stairs. Why didn't she call for help?
Because she broke her wrists.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They rearranged the furniture. [Invisible Kid]

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Sonnie
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Ther's a collision on the border of Scotland and England, both cars are totally smashed up, really nasty mess, though miraculously both drivers are thrown free and survive without a scratch...

the Englishman says - "Goodness gracious me! That was a lucky escape, we must have someone looking over us to survive that"

the Scotsman replies -"Aye it was miraculous.... I think we should toast our good luck"

the Englishman nods butthen says -"but what can we toast with?"

the Scotsman walks around the smashed remains of their two cars and, again miraculously, pulls out a bottle of whiskey from the remains of his car... walking back to the Englishman he pulls off the top and hands it to him.

The Englishman toasts their luck then takes a long drink out of the bottle, easily drinking a third of it in one go then hands it back to the Scotsman who says...

"No thanks, I'll have my drink after the police arrive"


OUCH!!!!!

[ August 12, 2003, 03:07 PM: Message edited by: Sonnie Boy ]

From: home sweet home... unless i'm posting from work | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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