posted
Granted! You've enrolled your kids, but they grow up wanting to be career McDonald's employees (free Big Macs!) instead of going to college.
I wish I could exchange those 100,000 confederate dollars for modern U.S. currency, and come back to life.
-------------------- The Semi-Great Gildersleeve - writing, super-heroes, and this 'n' that
From: The Stasis Zone | Registered: Jul 2003
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posted
Granted. Of course, that CSA$100,000, adjusted for inflation, comes out to about US$100. Oh, and after being dead for most of the last 100 years, you smell really bad.
I wish people would be more generous.
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
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Granted! You have the abiblity to fix the low-voltage lights under your kitchen cabinets. Unfortunately, in order to fix them, you will need a special discontinued part that needs to be special ordered and shipped from Bangladesh on a slow boat.
Next: I wish I could take my birthday off from work.
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
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posted
Granted! You have enough money to bribe NASA into placing your ashes aboard the next spacecraft bound for the outer planets.
I wish I were a brilliant teacher.
-------------------- The Semi-Great Gildersleeve - writing, super-heroes, and this 'n' that
From: The Stasis Zone | Registered: Jul 2003
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Granted, you teach chemistry in one of the rougher public high schools in the Distric of Columbia. Your students just doused you with benzene and ignited you.
I wish I were having sex with a blonde friend.
From: Washington DC | Registered: Oct 2004
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I wish I'd started graduate school right out of college and started my career six years sooner.
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
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Granted! but now insted of gas you have to use lots of high grade blue diamonds as a fule sorce, and you'll never get more that .5 miles a gallon. plus the conversion from carot weight to liquid messurement has yet to be discoverd. But in the year 2209 it will be.
I wish that I had my good eye back.
-------------------- Sometimes it's not worth chewing through the leather straps in the morning!
From: San Leandro, California | Registered: Jul 2006
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Granted. It sits in a glass on your bathroom sink.
I wish I had a home computer with free internet access.
-------------------- Five billion years from now the Sun will go nova and obliterate the Earth. Don't sweat the small stuff!
From: Boston | Registered: Aug 2003
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Granted. You're the most technology advance homeless vagrant in the park outside the Arlington County Courthouse -- a free public wi-fi hot spot.
Bring a blanket, it's getting cold.
I wish someone would steal my wife's VW so I could cash in the insurance and buy a Toyota or a BMW.
From: Washington DC | Registered: Oct 2004
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Granted! but it comes with an odd disfiguring tumor in the shape of ruth ginsberg (sp) on your back.
I wish the new puppy wouldn't use the house for a potty.
-------------------- Sometimes it's not worth chewing through the leather straps in the morning!
From: San Leandro, California | Registered: Jul 2006
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