posted
Lardy has the power to create living oxymorons. Unfortunately, the accent is on the "moron" part. They're never very bright.
Next: Chips and Salsa
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
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posted
Very specific subgenre of "Super-Disguise" under which Lardy has the ability to convince primitive cultures that he is a god... simply by covering himself with avacado dip.
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Six of One, Half-Dozen of the Other
-------------------- See Here for the latest update on the 2013 Chicago Gathering (now including tentative attendance list)
Registered: Feb 2008
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posted
Lardy has the power to shoot lasers from his eyes, but only at images of Mickey Mouse.
Next: Flying Buttress
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
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posted
Lardy has the ability to disarm opponents by hurling foam donut pillows with unerring accuracy. (What? You mean "Buttress" isn't a contraction of Butt Mattress?)
Next: One if by Land/Two if by Sea
-------------------- See Here for the latest update on the 2013 Chicago Gathering (now including tentative attendance list)
Registered: Feb 2008
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posted
Lardy has the ability to duplicate items, but only if he's in the middle of the ocean. It does come in handy whenever he's stranded on a deserted island, though.
posted
Lardy has the ability to transform into any mammal's toe. He most often uses it to turn into an elephant's toe to give people a boost when they need to reach something high up.
Titans Idol - vote for your favorite Titans members!
From: Wouldn't you like to know? | Registered: Oct 2003
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cleome46
or you can do the confusion 'til your head falls off
posted
Lardy can zap old, dead tennis balls with a magic ray, transforming them into delicious elbow macaroni casseroles! A terrific power if you're visiting relatives in the Midwest.
Next: The Bump!
-------------------- Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on flickr. Drop by and tell me that I sent you.
From: Vanity, OR | Registered: Dec 2008
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posted
Lardy has the power to create threads that had never existed with a start date of three years earlier. He then bumps them and says "remember this thread?", which everyone does.
Next: Forever in Bluejeans
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
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posted
Lardy has the power to curse anyone to always have to wear Blue Jeans only. No changing into slacks, boxer shorts, bikinis, mankinis, gowns, dresses, skirts, minis, body stockings, bermuda shorts...
posted
When faced with less than potent holiday eggnog, Lardy has the ability, by shouting the phrase, "YOHOHO," to summon the "Noble Spirits of Christmas Past" to promptly remedy the situation.
Next:
Jingle All the Way
-------------------- See Here for the latest update on the 2013 Chicago Gathering (now including tentative attendance list)
Registered: Feb 2008
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cleome46
or you can do the confusion 'til your head falls off
posted
If you're at the Laundromat, and find yourself faced with insufficient quarters in your pockets and an unresponsive change machine, just clap your hands once and say Lardy's name. He'll appear instantly, bringing change you really can believe in.
-------------------- Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on flickr. Drop by and tell me that I sent you.
From: Vanity, OR | Registered: Dec 2008
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Hyperpath: Email this page to someone!
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