posted
This is set in the Cartoon Universe, at a point in my story "Martian Heaven", when the Action Legion came to this universe, and Ebony was de-aged to a child.
...
Chapter I: All Through The House
"What do you think they are?"
"They look like potatoes."
She poked one and it fell apart, clinking like rocks as it hit the plate.
"Yeah those aren't potatoes."
8 year old, red-headed Ayla Ranzz and seven-year old, raven-haired Ebony Dent sat in the Legion kitchen pondering at a plate of the ugliest, brown-black, burnt lumps they had ever seen in their lives.
It was December 23rd. Christmas Eve Eve. Ayla was wearing a dark blue shirt with a picture of a halo on it. Ebony wore a pale pink shirt with a picture of a pale blue snowman on it. Both had on jeans.
"Where'd they come from?" Ayla asked.
"I dunno." Ebony replied, twirling a strand of her hair.
Then, the door silently creaked open, and a trickster snuck in.
"Think we should tell someone?" Ayla asked.
"Why should we?" Ebony questioned.
"I dunno. Just seems like we should". Ayla replied.
"Don't bother. No one ever listens to kids." Ebony moaned.
"Boo!"
Ayla jumped up in her seat. Ebony kept her place, her head held in her hands on the table.
"Heard you coming a mile away." She said to their red-haired, older visitor as he laughed. Garth Ranzz. Lightning Lad. The OTHER Lightning Lad from New Earth. Instead of his usual outfit, he wore on jeans and a black Magnoball jersey. He still didn't shave that stubble though, despite the annoyances from some annoying teen girl with black hair and big eyes.
"Oh really?" He smirked.
"You've gotta try better then that."
"Not for me!" Ayla said as she calmed down.
"Smart aleck." He nudged her head.
"Monkey boy."
"So, what're you two up to?" He asked.
"Pondering life, the universe, the quantum mechanics of existence…" Ebony said.
"And that." Ayla pointed to the plate. Garth furrowed his brow.
"What the heck are those things?" Garth asked.
"We don't know." Ebony explained.
"We thought they were potatoes." Ayla said.
"Those aren't potatoes."
"Figured." Ebony muttered.
"You seen my brother?" Ayla asked his counterpart.
"Some emergency in the city. Sorry kid." Garth apologized.
"Okay. I was hoping he could try them." Ayla said. "He'll eat anything." An idea flashed. She tuned the older Garth and smiled.
"Say…"
"Don't even. I'm too old to fall for that." Garth said.
"Hmmph. Then we won't find out what those things are." Ayla moaned. Ebony sighed.
"I'll do it. I've lived a good life."
"You're seven!" Ayla commented.
"I said good. Not long." Ebony corrected. She reached over to the plate, and plucked one of the lumps in her hand. This one didn't crumble. She cautiously sniffed it, and was surprised at first.
Chocolate? She thought. And peanut butter, and oatmeal. Wait. Are these cookies?
She closed her eyes, and began to place the supposed cookie in her mouth before it was snatched out of her hand by Garth, who then popped it in his mouth.
"Hey!" Ebony protested. Too late. He grimaced as he swallowed the thing whole rather then put his teeth at risk. "Why'd you do that?"
"You think I'm gonna let you eat something she found lying around?" The grimace was still there.
"He has a point." Ayla informed Ebony. "So? What are they?" Ayla asked.
"Someone's attempt at baking. Or at murder." Garth spat out.
Somewhere, Jazmin Cullen sneezed.
"So we can help you with… what, exactly?" Ebony asked.
"And where is everyone?" Ayla asked. "This place has been a whole ghost town."
She was right. It was quiet. Too quiet. No laughing, no holiday cheer, no reprimanding.
"What gives?" Ebony asked.
"Well, some big emergency pulled most of the others out on missions." Garth informed, finally forgetting the awful taste.
"Which ones. Yours or mine?" Ayla asked, meaning which Legionnaires, the ones from her universe or his.
"Both."
"So, we're left alone. With you." Ebony clarified.
"Yep."
"Why?"
"Can't I simply volunteer to perform a kindness for two sweet and adorable girls?" Garth innocently asked.
"You had no say, did you?" Ebony asked again.
"None of your business." Garth told her.
"Did we have any say in the matter?" Ayla asked.
"Either me, or the Blob." Garth smirked.
"How can you make yourself both choices?" Ebony joked.
"Watch it, Sarcasm Queen." Garth jokingly warned.
"LB Lord." She joked back.
Good, Ayla thought, a show all to myself.
"Now come on, I want you two out of here." Garth started to lead them out the door.
"Why?" Ayla asked. "Gift wrapping?"
"Grown-up stuff."
"I thought you were supposed to do that in the bathroom?" Ebony said with such innocence it made Garth's madly blushing face even redder. Ayla was confused.
"What's that supposed to me-"
"NOTHING." Garth told her, before whispering in Ebony's ear, "Don't even dare tell her."
"Fine. As a favor to you. Only because I think married men are cute." Ebony moaned.
"Wish I could say the same for you."
The door slammed shut.
"Come on, let's go hang out in the lounge." Ayla suggested.
"I guess." Ebony sighed. Melancholy in her eyes. Alone at Christmastime, again. At least it was better then being with Marcie, her stepmother.
They didn't see the rat scamper off.
…
"So, what did you ask for Christmas?" Ayla asked. The two were sitting, sprawled out on the lounge floor. Ayla was watching some stupid cartoon, Ebony had a colored pencil in her hand was drawing in a white sketchbook.
"Ah, well… what did you ask for?" Ebony asked.
"Where do you I start?" Ayla asked. She pulled out a list. A long list. It unraveled on the floor, rolling like the red carpet at an awards ceremony. The top read…
WHAT I WANT FOR XMAS: PART I
"You need most of that stuff?" Ebony asked. "'A hovercraft, another hovercraft, a hovercraft to carry the other hovercrafts, a space monkey zoo...'"
"Someone does." Ayla said.
Compassionate. Oh that made her cuter, Ebony thought.
"So, what did you want." Ayla asked.
"It doesn't matter." Ebony said, looking down at her sketchbook.
"Why?" Ayla asked.
"I never get what I want anyway." Ebony sighed.
"Well what do you want?"
"Besides a Poprocket UFO doll and Donkey Kong 64, I just want to spend Christmas with some more people, and see mom again." Ebony sighed. "And Santa never brings anything I want."
"Why's that?"
"SHE won't send my letters." Ebony clarified. Ayla knew who she meant.
"I'm sorry your stepmother's so evil." Ayla apologized.
"You're a sweet kid." Ebony thanked, before sighing.
"Well…" Ayla started. "You're spending Christmas here. And if anything, you're with me and Garth. Not MY Garth, mind you."
"I'm just visiting. And he should be with his sons and you should be with your brothers." Ebony put her pencil down and showed her next sketch. "What do you think?" She held up a picture of a white-haired woman who bore a resemblance to Wonder Woman of ancient Earth. Far impressive work for a seven year old.
"Wow. Who is she?" Ayla asked.
"Her name's Glory. She's kind of like Wonder Woman. Isn't she hot?" Ebony asked.
"Hot?" Ayla couldn't believe a seven year old used words like hot to describe someone.
"Well, hot enough. Thank God Moore took over the writ-"
They heard a crash. It interrupted Ebony's train of thought. The crash had come from the kitchen.
"What do you think he's doing?" Ayla asked, assuming Garth made the noise.
"Probably scarfing down any of the sweets Tinya's puppy made." At that moment, Tinya Wazzo and Brin Londo sneezed.
"Why do you keep making jokes like that?" Ayla asked.
"Eh. Gotta do something for laughs." Ebony shrugged.
Ayla would've replied, but then she thought she saw something move on the tree. Not an ornament. Something else. A ball twitched.
"What? Don't like my sense of humor?"
…
He stood in front of the stove stirring a pot of pasta. The TV was on. An old horror movie.
"The call is coming from inside the house!"
And like every horror movie, the actress did something stupid and ran into the killer's clutches.
"Moron." Garth said to the TV. He had some reserves with playing the role of a babysitter instead of kicking the ass of some moron in a bad costume, but he was a parent, and found satisfaction in what he did. But he would be damned if he gave the Sarcasm Queen of Earth-22 more joke ammo, even if they did like each other. Garth's ego couldn't take it.
"Easy now…" He said as he began to pour the pasta out into a big bowl on the table. Three dishes were set. Penne alla pesto.
"Score one for Mr. Stay-At-Home Dad." Garth said to himself proudly. He was about to get the girls, when the evil little thing struck.
The rat slinked by, running on the counter lightning fast. It's little eyes practically glowing, when-
YOINK.
"And just where do you think you're going?"
He held the rat by it's thin tail. It wiggled around
"Sorry buddy. No free food for you." Garth said. He began to head for the door, to the entrance, to toss it out in the snow.
"The girls would freak if they saw you." Garth said, actually talking to it. "Although, considering the stuff they've seen…" Garth was pondering when the rat struck. It sunk its teeth into his hand.
"OW!" He muttered a curse and dropped the rat by mistake. Little drops of blood sprinkled the floor. The rat scampered to the table and knocked over a glass. More to clean up.
"You wanna dance?" He asked. The rat stared at him. Did it nod its head? Then, the rat hissed and incredibly picked up a knife in it's teeth. Garth's eyes began to glow.
"Check out time." Garth said, and fired a bolt at it. The lightning bounced off the knife, and hit the pasta.
SPLAT!
Sauce got splattered all over his head, and some of the walls. Garth rubbed pesto sauce out of his eyes. The rat was still there. It lunged at him, before Garth moved out of the way, it bounced on the wall and fell on it's back. Garth sent a jolt into it. The rat twitched in pain, before lying still.
"End of the line for you buddy." He muttered as he tossed it in the trash. Then realized he needed to clean up, or suffer the wrath of Imra. Both Imras. After that, he needed to figure out what they were gonna eat. How would they react to the shriveled, emaciated bodies of two little girls and a grown man?
RRRRIIIING!
"What now?" He muttered to himself.
The holo-phone rang. Caller ID came up.
UNKNOWN.
He picked it up anyway. No screen popped up.
"Legion of Super-Heroes. Now's not a really good time hello?"
Then, he heard it. The breathing. Slow, raspy, breathing. Gasps of air.
"Hello?" He asked again. "Is someone there?" He said once more, annoyed.
Then, the voice came on. Raspy, grated, like a hag.
"Naughty or nice?"
CLICK.
He looked at the phone for a minute.
"O-kay…"
And, rather then doing something stupid…
"COMPUTO, trace that call." Garth ordered. He didn't know if it would listen to him.
"Well that figures." Garth said. From what he heard about this universe's version of Esper Lass, she was a real bitch.
"Now, what about dinner?" He mused to himself.
Then, he dialed for pizza.
"Luigi Brothers Pizza…"
…
The rat scampered down the dark hall. It stopped at a pair of black boots. And faded away. In the darkness, hundreds of red eyes opened up. A rat stepped out.
"There, there…"
The rat relaxed in content as it was petted, by a pair of bony, white claws.
"Ho, ho, ho."
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
The snow whipped and howled. In the city and in space Legionnaires fought the brave fight. And so did a lone delivery boy as he drove through the blinding, cruel whiteness.
DING-DONG.
"Pizza!" He said, although one could barely hear it with the howling wind.
The doors burst open, letting in the cold. The red-head who answered the door got covered in snow.
"Two plain pies?" The delivery boy asked as he held up the warm pizza boxes while the red-head shook some of the snow off.
"Thanks man." The red-head handed him the money and took said pizzas.
That's when the pizza boy recognized him.
"Hey! I thought I saw you downtown." The delivery boy recalled. "You shaved."
"Wrong guy." The red-head said.
"No I never forget a face."
The red-head looked around, suspiciously.
"Can you keep a secret?" He asked. The pizza boy leaned in. "Between you and me I'm his counterpart from another Earth and me and my teammates are here to *BLEEEEEEEEP*."
(For reasons that would spoil the story Garth's reason for being on this Earth must be kept confidential to you, the readers. Deal with it)
The pizza guy started to laugh out loud.
"Good one, man."
"You asked." The red-head smirked.
The pizza boy laughed all the way back to his hover-car. It made him forget about the snow. It also kept him from checking the car…
Or seeing the horde of rats hidden in the backseat. A before-dinner snack.
…
"Girls! Dinner's here!" Garth called from the kitchen. The sauce and the pasta on the walls was gone. So was the sauce in his hair. The girls came in, and looked at the pizzas in surprise.
"I thought we were eating pasta." Ebony said.
"What made you think that?" Garth asked as he set the pizza down.
"We could smell the sauce." Ebony explained.
"Pesto sauce, right?" Ayla asked Ebony.
"That's what I thought."
"It went bad. Change of plans." Garth explained. Why bother grossing them out with a dead rat?
"Is that sauce in your hair?" Ebony asked. Garth felt his head. Missed a spot.
"It's a new conditioner. Keeps it nice and silky. The ladies love it." Garth primped his hair as he joked.
"I don't." Ebony mumbled.
"You're too young to appreciate a mature man." Garth retorted it.
"I'll know that when I meet one." She replied.
"What kind did you get?" Ayla asked, breaking the joke war.
"I wasn't sure what you wanted so I got plain…"
Ebony wasn't listening. She zoned out. Something caught her eye. What was that on the floor? Was that blood? A tiny trail of it. And she heard something. She seemed to be lost. A scratching noise.
Skritch skirtch skritch.
Scratch scratch scratch.
Skritch, scratch, skritch.
The rat had found a hitch.
It cut the pup, then slashed him up.
Skritch, scratch, skritch.
"Whoa, where'd that come from?" Ebony said to herself.
"Where'd what come from?"
Back to planet Earth. Garth and Ayla gave her odd looks.
"I'm sorry what?" She asked.
"You were talking to yourself." Ayla informed her.
"You okay? You kinda zoned out there, kid." Garth said, concern in his eyes.
"I guess I'm tired. Hungry I guess." Ebony blushed.
"Well, dinner is served." Garth motioned to the table like a host at a restaurant.
"There's not too much crust, is there?" Ayla asked.
The rats in the walls listened.
…
Dinner went smoothly. Garth ordered extra in case their teammates came back and they would be hungry. Should've ordered more. It was almost gone thanks to the two Ranzzes. Growing up on a farm can give one quite an appetite, surprising for a small girl.
Ebony basically nibbled the pizza, but she ate. Nibbled like a rat.
No, don't think about rat.
She didn't want to think about the poem that zapped in her head. It was hard not to. A vivid imagination tends to run wild. Something was about to shock her back into reality.
*BUUUUURRRP!*
"Excuse me. Sorry about that, girls."
"You're so gross!" Ayla laughed.
"Years of practice." Garth concluded as he put a hand to his chest. Ayla rolled her eyes.
"Boys. You're worse then my brother."
Ebony needed to keep up, no worrying about her from them. That did cheer her up. A little. If not grossing her out.
"I'd be forced to give that an 8 at par." She drolled out.
"An 8? That was a nine at best!" Garth pointed an accusing finger at her.
"Arguing with the judge gets you a 7." Ebony told him.
"Lousy, fixed, stupid…" Garth muttered to himself.
"What can we have for dessert?" Ayla asked.
"Ice cream." Garth said.
"I'll get it." Ayla motioned.
"So, what's after dessert Mr. Homemaker?" Ebony asked as Ayla began to pile vanilla and chocolate ice cream in bowls.
"Well, then you guys clean up," Garth explained, "and-"
"Whoa. Why do we have to clean up?" Ayla asked. "You're the babysitter."
"I don't want you two slacking off. And besides, I made dinner."
Ayla sat the bowls in front of them. Ayla's notably had the most.
"Oh yeah, ordering pizza is so tiring." Ayla joked.
"I slaved all day in front of a hot phone and this is the thanks I get." Garth said as he got up. "No appreciation I tells ya." He started piling more ice cream in his bowl.
"You're not really gonna eat all that. Are you?" Ayla asked.
"Working all day builds an appetite." The tower of ice cream was nearly as tall as Ayla's. Nearly up to the ceiling. "And look who's talking."
"I'm a growing girl. I need my strength."
"Growing into what, exactly?" Ebony muttered to herself. She nursed hers, still thinking about what she saw. "Uh, hey, did you-"
"Betcha I can eat this faster then you." Ayla said, the little sister in her shining.
"That's really a bet you don't want to make." Garth warned her. For an adult, he really acted like such a kid.
"How bout this?" Ayla asked. "Loser cleans up dinner."
"I think that can be arranged." Garth said. "What were you saying?" He turned to the jet-haired seven year old. So did Ayla.
"Don't look at me." She flat out told the two. "I'm playing the Switzerland card." Chickened out, again.
"Fine." Ayla mumbled. "You be the judge."
"And you help the loser." Garth explained.
"Why me?" Ebony moaned to herself.
The red eyes were watching their meals.
…
"Lousy, stinking…"
Ayla stood on a chair, cleaning the dishes in the sink and ignoring the throbbing headache. Ebony was cleaning the table off. Garth had one arm slung over his chair, the other picking at his grinning teeth with a toothpick. Bowl cleaned right off. The beast connected to his esophagus had been satisfied. For now.
"Told ya." He grinned.
"You're a freak, you know that?" Ayla sharply turned.
"Don't mess with the best." He flicked the toothpick away.
"Whatever." Ayla muttered.
Ebony was on the table, on her knees, scrubbing it over, before she turned to Garth.
"You know there ARE child labor laws."
"Not on this planet." Garth said, before he dropped his smirk. "Get your feet off the table, it's bad manners."
"Fine." She balled up the paper towel in her hands and sank back in her chair next to him. Then she put her head down and sighed.
"You okay?" Garth asked.
"Just tired." She sighed.
"That all?"
"I'm fine. Honest. Is it alright if I could have coffee?"
"No!" Garth ruffled her hair. "You're too young to drink that stuff."
"Says you." She turned her gaze over to the spot. Garth's smile dropped, now with concern.
"You really were quiet. Is something bothering you?" Garth asked, everplaying the role of the parent figure.
"No, no. But…"
"You can tell me if you want."
"Yeah?" Ebony asked.
"Not like I'm gonna bite or anything." He laughed. She felt jealous of whoever had this guy and his wife as parents.
"Why was there blood on the floor?" She pointed to the trash can. Garth got confused, then looked at the hand that was bitten. He didn't remember losing THAT much blood.
"You're cut!" Ebony said in surprise, but lowering her voice not to alert Ayla.
"I'm fine. I just got bit by-"
"If you have the decency to wrap bandages around your hands when they're NOT bleeding you should at least clean a bite wound. Blockhead Boy." She muttered as she started to clean the dry cut with a napkin.
"Sorry." He said, grinning bashfully.
"What bit you?"
RRRRIIING!
The phone again.
"You get it?" He asked her. "I'm just gonna congeal here for a minute." He sighed.
"Fine. Make the little kids do all the work. Lard Lad." She muttered as she went to phone.
"Pessimist Princess." He shot back.
CALLER UNKNOWN.
"There's no ID." Ebony said.
"Then don't answer." Garth said. Then he wondered why he didn't take his own advice earlier. Unfortunately, Ayla picked it up.
"Hello? Legion of Super-Heroes."
No one replied.
"Hello?"
Then, the breathing started. Slower, slower, until-
SSSSKKKKKRRRRIIIITTTTCCHH!
"Ahhh!" They covered their ears to block out the noise. Nails on a chalkboard. Scratching, scratching, rending.
"Shut it off!" One of them screamed.
"Ho ho ho!"
"What the-?" Ayla started, wondering if blood was coming out of her ears.
"Have you been good or bad this year?"
"Have I what? Who is this?" Ayla asked.
"Better watch out. Cuz Santa Claws is coming to town."
SKRITCH. SKRITCH. SKRITCH.
Skritch skritch skritch.
The boy had had an itch.
He went to cough, when his lips got torn off.
Skritch skritch skritch.
Ayla gasped as that poem popped in her mind.
CLICK.
They stared at the phone in her hand.
"What the hell was that about?" Ayla asked.
"You're eight, don't talk like that." Garth told her.
…
"Thanks warden."
The screen went black. Garth had just finished speaking with the warden of Takron-Galtos, and the stationed Legion Cadet Mandalla. The call had, once again, been traced back to Takron-Galtos and the caller was, once again, Meta Ulnoor, who fully admitted it if they left her alone. Some thanks and a thumbs-up earned a promise from the blushing Mandalla to make sure the calls would stop. Then, he had to call in his team, and his counterpart's team, to fill them in, and they were still busy. Now, they'd been pulled off-planet.
"So, besides that…" The younger Cosmic Boy asked.
"It's fine. We just had dinner. Don't worry." Garth explained.
"Okay."
"Tell my sis I said hi." Garth's counterpart popped up.
ZZT.
Garth hung his head and went to explain the situation to the two girls in the lounge. Far, far away from the kitchen.
"You find out who that was?" Ayla asked.
"Some joker from Takron-Galtos. Nothing to worry your head off. And your brother says hi." Garth explained.
"When are they getting back? I'm starting to get worried." Ayla said.
"They're still busy. Sorry." He apologized.
"And it's still snowing. What if we get snowed in?" Ayla wondered.
"And then we'll probably have to resort to cannibalism." Ebony thought out loud. "I don't like human flesh."
"Whoa whoa, whoa." Garth put his hands up in a stopping motion. "Don't let your imaginations get carried away. One, we don't have to worry about snowed in. Two, our friends are fine. They can take care of themselves."
"I WANT to worry." Ebony told him. She still thought about that call, the scratching noise like the one she heard. She'll tell him, but what about Ayla? Why should she be scared?
"Would they like it if you did?" Garth asked. Ebony didn't reply. He looked at the bite mark on his hand, now bandaged.
"I dunno."
"I wish they'd get home." Ayla complained.
This was not easy. Garth didn't want these kids to worry. That would make him a bad babysitter.
"Now then. What do you guys want to do?" Garth asked, changing the topic.
"I dunno? Movies?" Ayla said.
"Video games." Ebony said.
"Show of hands for video games?" Garth asked. Only Ebony raised her hand. "Now a show of hands for movies?"
"Don't bother." Ebony replied.
"So. After you two take a bath, how 'bout we just veg out in the living room. Watch some vids. How's that?" Garth smiled.
"Do we have to take a bath?" Ayla asked.
"Yeah. You two are pretty ripe."
"The pot calling the kettle bla-aaack." Ebony whispered in a singsong voice. Yeah, Garth realized, he was pretty ripe himself. Thank God this place had plenty of showers. Course, he was used to not showering all that time on the run. God knows he did miss it though.
"What if we don't want to take a bath?" Ayla asked.
"Well, you can either do it of your own free will, or the kicking and screaming option." Garth explained.
The two stood their ground.
"You try it and I'll kick your butt. You know I can." Ebony threatened.
"You're pretty cocky for a seven-year old."
"And you're pretty fat for a monkey."
"…"
"Fine. Kicking and screaming it is." Garth sighed.
He hoisted the two up by their collars.
"Hey! Put me down!" Ayla yelled.
"Well according to this one, I could use the after-dinner workout." He motioned to Ebony.
"This is child abuse!" Ebony yelled.
"Poor babies. How you suffer so." Garth rolled his eyes.
"Date rape! Date rape!" Ebony screamed.
"Don't joke about that." Garth told her.
"Sorry."
As always, the rat watched, and hissed it fangs at the one who killed him.
Garth felt a chill go up his spine when he thought he heard the scratching noise.
Scratch skritch scratch.
The woman unlocked the latch.
In came the beast, she was his feast.
Scratch skritch scratch.
Garth shook his head and blinked.
I've been hanging out with that morbid Superman clone too long, Garth thought.
…
The rats marched through the snow. Their master waited for them, cooing and scratching behind the ear of one in particular.
"Wonderful."
They left behind a clean, white skeleton.
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
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