I hope it hurts!!!

<looks to the sky>

Time to start assembling the troops...

My fleets will destroy you!

THIS IS WAR!!!

<joins fleets>

I care not who I join, as long as Legion World burns in the process!

Burn it shall!

Hello, Viviane!

War Planet, Sweet, War Planet.

Those little pipsqueaks are going to learn a lesson they'll never forget!

Once I descend upon them our mighty weapon, they'll be begging for their salvation!

Don't count on it!

We're terrible at begging. Really...and we just remodeled my suite at the Clubhouse, I don't think I want it destroyed just yet.

I hope you nefarious types realize that LegionWorld once had another name. A simple command word and you'll be facing one of the deadliest galactic war machines ever built.
Mongul may have been a thick witted brute but he sure had an eye for magnificent weapons.


Can we talk?

**Purr**

<Silent Cat Laughter>

HPV, Contact me, Soon...

<Silent Cat Laughter>

**Purr**

HPV is dead, I'm DPV friend of the DMV (Dark Motor Vehicles).

<Semi slips in to Avalon under cloak of invisibility. Secretly he empties a vial of de-evilizer into Viv's cup of boiling blood. Hope this works, he mutters under his breath.>

Look, boiling blood!

Smells good and smells like...Braalian blood, I never use Braalian blood on a Tuesday.

I guess we'll need some new blood. Now, where could I get some new blood, I know I could, OH, COOKIES!

IGRAINE, MORGAINE!

Cobalt has contacted the Triumvirate!

Did you hear what he said to them?

Why are you calling on your evil relatives, Migraine and M'orgasm? Can't you fight your own battles?

We heard.

HAHAHAHAHA!

No one told me that he did stand-up.

These people think they are so powerful, the little whimps, it's nothing but hot air. Some chick in green and a yellow dude come and threaten us, I'm shaking in my knickers.

Ok, Partly Invisible Weiner-Head! I'm going to hurt you.

IMPROPERMARTINIUS

(bad martinis are mystically hurled at Semi)

And they splash harmlessly against my moisture resistant bar-apron.

Well done!

Now where was I, oh yes.

(runs at Semi and pulls his hair)

Ouch!

(slaps Semi wildly)

Now this is getting silly. I hate it when I have to be a gentleman. I'll just turn invisible and depart from this wrteched planet in the PMS Quadrant.

Teach him to poison my blood.

(focuses her powers to block Semi for entering the black mist covered War Planet)

Viv's attempt to block me doesn't work and I bid an un-fond farewell to the misty covered hell-hole of Avalon.

Damn, it didn't work!

Wait (closes eyes) there, it's up.

(the planet fades aways into the power of the black mists)

i've been looking for a new vacation spot.

Are you going to be a general of mine?

Cobalt Kid is a typical speciman. He lashes out at Viviane, not because she has attacked Legion World, but because he aches, his little heart is broken.

He can't help what his poor emotions lead him to believe, it's one of his many downfalls.

very well. evil it is. i have chosen to announce my surrender to the dark side on this most unholiest of war planets.

maybe it was dark viv's wooing, the fact that the next star wars is coming out and anniken turns evil, or that i've always had a dark phoenix complex....who knows! besides good will always take me back. bwahahahahaha

Yeah, it's their "nature." HAHAHAHAHA!

Welcome, disaster boy, you'll feel right at home here.

i already do...it's so slinky in here....grrrRR!

Ohh...who let the tiger out!

when do i get my weapons, "soldiers", skin tight black leather uniform, and of course i will need a riding crop!

My Lady,

As Amabassador for Legion World, I have been asked to approach you to ascertain your position and intentions towards Legion World and its citizens. I hope we can enter into meaningful negotiations to reach a mutually beneficial and positive outcome to this current situation.

Faraway Lad,

I just want to conquer your land and have my hordes show me your viscera.

After you take the oath.

I think you all need to take a bath before that oath. Might wash off some of the evil. And you girls could stand to moisturize a bit. Brains and cunning are one thing, but to really succeed in this world, there's nothing like a glowing complexion.

I could say the same thing about you, you mean ole' bartender!

I'm just trying to be helpful. Now get yourself down to Neiman Marcus for a free glamour beauty makeover. You'll feel better and stop hurting people.

I feel great, and I would kill you!

Hey, look at me, I'm a huge nerd like you fellas.

That's not very nice.

No, no...I'm just goofing, I thought everyone was hip to this site; I just wanted to quote. I love this thread.


http://www.jaypinkerton.com/blog/archives/001334.html

Hmmm...My Cobalt Clones eats boys named Pete.

Cobie's my bud. It's a funny, funny article about "Sin City". Just diggin' the satire.

http://www.jaypinkerton.com/blog/archives/001334.html

[quote]Originally posted by Probability Pete:
[b]It's a funny, funny article about "Sin City". Just diggin' the satire.

[/quote]]http://www.jaypinkerton.com/blog/archives/001334.html[/qb][/QUOTE]

You do realize I'm just messing with you, not angry, I'm just evil.

Forgive me Lake Lady. Just having a good day after lots of bad days; forgive my silliness.

Oh, don't worry, the clones only eat brains, it only hurts a lot, but if you want you can join my army of evil.

But I'm GOOD! How can I join?

By turning utterly evil.

But true.

Let us bask in our nerdness!

Or... feast on the Blood of the Ancients. Whichever comes first.

Kent, get evil or get bent.

We got viscera?

You sure do!

Viscera: a synonym for entrails, internal organs

and who's head on a platter should accompany this oath?

whatever, evil by it's nature is hotter than good.

neiman marcus is an evil hang out. ever been there during a sale? good guys get....NOTHING.

That'll be good enough for the oath.

Here's your whip, the assortment of black clothes and the weapons closet in a special area, which I'll send you to.

at last, i am finally evil

Great, isn't it?

i feel so liberated.

Ahh, why don't you have a little fun and launch an attack on Legion World.

i'll begin by shooting their pets. puppy stew!!!!

Start with Cobalt, he's their sweetiest pup.

i'll teach that pup to roll over and beg for scraps.

Now evil planet killers are one thing - but I draw the line at puppy killers. Trust me, you don't really want to see me mad.

when i said i went evil, i meant it.

But I kind of like puppies...

But I won't stop you, disaster boy, that's something a "good" person would do.

Evil... bah! That is sooooo '00s!

...but then again, it still is the 00s...

...ah for the innocence of the gothic, nihilistic 90s...

You are so L7!

He's an all-girl punk band?

Sure, why not, but I was refering to being "square."

I know.

But I prefer to think of him as an all-girl punk band.

They're your fantasies.

Not a particularly talented all-girl punk band, mind you. Maybe more like the Runaways then the Donnas.

But he's certainly no Jem & The Holograms.

i wanna be an all girl punk band....or at least le tigre, or hole

Oh, don't sweet talk me!

ha ha ha ha ha ha

i too have an evil new avatar!

New evil avitar?

Bah!

Well, evil in a Keith Giffen "Nyah-hah-hah" sense, anyway.

SHUT-UP!

Or I'll give you my evil-sandy thong!

(Went to the beach yesterday, never wrestle with your girl friends in the sand, especially when your not wearing any pants)

This is where the "Seperated by a common language" thing starts to kick in

Anyone take video?

that's the best kind....

<eyes island from below>

Did we decide on whether to make this a floating island casino or a floating island of Cobalt Kid statues?

I thought we was going to conrete it all over and turn it into a super overflow car park ... of space. For those long nights at shakes when we need to leave the cars safe and get a taxi back.

If viv is nice she can have a job as a car park attendant for us.

As long as I can us your bones as the cement mix, I'll be all nice!

ohhh please allow ME to park your cars....in HADES!!!!!

guess what, it's monday and i'm evil again.

I say casino.

Otherwise we'd just spend too much time blowing everything up.

You guys are such a pain, you all drove me EVIL!

Thank you just park Miners Cruiser over there please and don't scratch the paintwork.

(points at car and blows it up, points at Faraway Lad)

You'd better make use of that power of yours!

try speeding away in an earthquake or hurricane....

(looks at wreckage)

Funny, it wasn't a compact when I drove it here.

too bad your valet slip says we are not liable for "acts of dark priestesses or their gogo boys"

don't worry miner i'll give you a lift back to shakes.

That's very kind of you db, but the car was just for stylin' and profilin' really.

(teleports)

DISASTER BOY! Your mission is to destroy Faraway Lad! And make it snappy!

kung fu it is!

haiiiiiii yahhhhhhhh

HAHAHAHA!

Take that Mr. Faraway!

awwwwwww now there's noboday to beat up.

db sad now.

how do you like my new not as hot as my old avatar viv?

Well welcome back db. sorry but when you attacked me like that the faraway force kicked in and sent you faraway from me. How was the walk back from shakes.

Now I need to investigate this island and see if I can find the secret of why Viv has turned evil.

<points finger at db and sends his trousers faraway, then points again and send db faraway to Vee's Variable Villa>

At least I hope thats where he ends up.

<flies up via hip-hop robot sidekic 'Bot-fizzle', given to Cobalt by Actor Lad>

Thanks Bo-Fiz! I need to plant this device to start part one of our plan to secure this island. I better be quick and get back down to rejoin the others...considering I'm without my magnetic powers!

so let me get this straight, first you teleport me to a bar, where of course i have a few (8) drinks before returing to the unholy war planet. then you teleport me to a villa without any pants....way to keep me preoccupied. assuming this vee character is male i may have some trouble returning to avalon.

you are a vicious combatant faraway, vicious!

Oh Vee is 100% male I can assure you

The attractions of the Villa are many and delightful but you must be on best behaviour (of course pants are optional in the Villa as elsewhere on LegionWorld) or you may have to deal with the dozen or so blond haired tautly muscled members of my Varangian Guard that that I seconded to guard the Villa and Vee.

Oh Vee is 100% male I can assure you

The attractions of the Villa are many and delightful but you must be on best behaviour (of course pants are optional in the Villa as elsewhere on LegionWorld) or you may have to deal with the dozen or so blond haired tautly muscled members of my Varangian Guard that that I seconded to guard the Villa and Vee.

(Teleports disaster boy by her side, then DETONATES THE WAR PLANET WITH ALL OF THEM ON IT)

(stands in the middle of the carnage as the flames steals the powers of those not under her protection, and only hers)

HAHAHAHA!

It's splendid. Let's watch the heroes burn, look they're gasping for air!

HAHAHAHA!

Um, hate to interrupt the gloating and stuff, but the guys and I bailed for the kegger a few hours back.

But you sure did do a number on all those Bizarro Cobies, not to mention that robot chihuahua Reboot keeps calling "Miner".

buzzkill

Well, youhave been needing an arch-nemesis for quite some time now.
Why not the Anti-Miner Chihuahua of Doom?

Technically that would be me. Please allow me to refer you to our customer service department - outsourced to BGZTL

Don't worry, this is just a ploy, as were the clones, besides there is still a few hundred billion more.

Now, to the War Planet!

(she enters the shadows and leaves this Universe, beyond the reach of magic, science and any other form of transportation known to you people)

i will kill you slowly. you'll be violet by the time i'm through with you.

{throws phone at yellow king}

ha ha ha you can't get into the war planet. you can't get into teh war planet.

oh wow, it's so nice in here viv, and everyone here is so much fun, and so beautiful. and this food's so good. mmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmm mmmmmmm


nyah nyah nyah nyah nah

yeah.

But the soil, air, food, the light, the darkness, atmosphere, all of it is poison and destructive unless you're evil!

then by all means get those invitations out.

first class tickets for everyone to the war planet!

oh i mean we want to talk "peace" yeah that's it...come to the war planet and we can discuss the terms of our truce.

give peace a chance.

No need to trick them, pet, they're blinded by the "pursuit of justice." The fools will come on they're own.

Wait a minute, is the floating war planet destroyed?

Or was that the hallucinagins talking?

The black & white feline wanders into the inner sanctum of the Dark Priestess. Sniffing out the wardrobe that houses the Evil One's favorite clothing, the regal cat works the drawers open with her claws and hops inside. Using her claws once again she begins shredding the finery into little slivers of soft cloth. Satisfied with her effort, she hovers over the pile and relieves herself, purring happily the entire time.

There that should do the trick!

Done, she exits the way she came. No human has ever discovered a way of keeping a cat out of someplace where the cat wanted to go, much to the humans' chargrin

Once more I'm reminded why I am a long-time friend to all LW felines!

Of course you realize by coming here she has attain rabies.

(throws flames at her clothes and creates a new wardrobe)

Which LMBP have you been fighting?

I was doing just fine without one.

OK, I give. That's a keeper.

Is this the right place?
Looks like somebody forgot to pay the light bill this month.
What's this?
hhmmm...a sign buried under all these shrubs...umm
Pi.k Pa..her Nu..st Cam.
?eh?
Oh "Pink Panther Nudist Camp - abandon cloth all ye who enter here"

Crap. I knew there was going to be trouble with these new GPS thingamies. Somebody hyperpath me the RIGHT directions please?

<flies up via hip-hop robot sidekick>

*Gulp!* I'm here! I might not have my magnetic powers back yet, but my spiritual awareness powers will at least let me know when Viv is approaching so I can get the freg out of there!

(Did I just say 'freg'? *choke* Am I turning into Reboot?)

<pulls out Adam Strange/Captain Comet/Captain Marvel-esque gun>

Since we decided to skip the coordinating session of attack and all just jump on in, I guess I'll, er, just start blasting stuff! That nice botanical garden looks like a good place to start!

feh-
Coordination is highly over-rated. Just point the way to the booze and we'll have a crowd here in no time at all.

Besides, I've authorized deployment of my brand spankin' new Red Army led by one of my niftiest new recuits in quite a while. I'd introduce you but most people only meet the Red Menace once and to tell you the truth here, the less said the better.
I know, I know it sure looks like a private army but technically (and on all the official paperwork) it's a boyband with revolving members.

They sing while they work...it's kind of creepy.

"I say there Cobalt old chap!

Well if diplomacy fails I suppose a good old fashioned bout of fisticuffs may be just as effective, eh? whatho"

"Now who or what shall we send Faraway first?"


Points finger and the bushes disappear.

"HEy could ya not warn me first" Shouted Yellow King hurredly standing up and pulling his zipper up. "that coulda been embarrassing I tell ya"

Well, I'm here! Oops! Sorry about that, must have tripped.

Now, where shall I send my bees to start this assault? Or should I just grit my teeth and prepare to get blasted/beat up/thrown off the island? We second-tier characters never fare well in these things...

You betcha!
See that entrance to the underground labyrinth over there?
Yeah that one. Nobody's ever prepared for a swarm of bees.
Have at'em!

err...you have complete control over the swarm right? I'd rather not have to use my transuit if I don't have to, I still haven't had it fumigated after the "I farted" thread.

Viviane! Disaster Boy! C'mon out with your hands up!!! Give up your evil ways and come back into the light.

.

.

.

.

Well, that didn't work... Fire at will!!!! Bees away!!!

Oh, and I brought some blue kryptonite in case there's still any more Bizarro Cobies around. And I found some gray kryptonite in stores; I'm not really sure what it does but I thought it might come in handy.

Disaster Boy isn't evil, I took his powers like two days ago.

Look, it's time for earthquakes and acid rain!!!

Acid rain? Oh that IS evil. Totally ruined the paint on my Porsche.
As for the earthquakes...weren't you issued an LMB Walking Ring? You should have already known they won't affect us in the least bit. You should have had a handbook with the full explanation of the ring, the secret handshake and insider trading stock options.

Ah well, maybe if we get rebooted again this will end better next time.

"Remember the Main!!"
*YK spins and forms a column of tightly focused whirling air. Lightning cracks and thunder screams, the wind roars under the stresses of the 150 mile an hour winds. Yellow Kid then steps outside the newly birthed tornado and sends it speeding toward the Priestess*

<Meanwhile, Outdoor Miner kicks back on a dilapidated sofa in a chamber of a Huge, Pulsating, Ever-Expanding Chicken Heart and observes>

Well, it was either this or another Gilmore Girls rerun...

*snaps her fingers and the winds head back at Yellow Kid and his friends at ten times the force

This is my War Planet, I control everything, including him.

*points to the giant with, bad breath, laser beaming eyes, and a big mallet!

A big wallet? My kind of giant.

tsk< that only appears to be weather my dear. It's a physical effect of my power, not the power itself.

*the air pressure equalizes suddenly as the tornado breaks apart. Everybody's ears feel the pressure from the sudden shift.
The raw force of YK's spin power begins to tear out huge chunks of earth. Stones fly in all directions at tremendous speed. The sky darkens with the sheer volume of dust.*

*casts an invulnerability spell on giant

You really don't want to mess with Bill, now!

Get the yellow one!

Oop.

Got a giant of my own, my dear. Faraway would you mind bringing in the Gay Green Giant? Bob doesn't like it much when supervillians try to screw up his cash cow.

*teleports in, Rebooted into Intangibility Mode*

1) I have never typed the word you used (I'm not going to type it now, which would lead to an inevitable "You just did" )
2) As you well know, I have no love for head-chipping traitors, and if you start that sort of thing, I will have no particular compunction about handing you over to Vivianne and, when your chopped up remains are found, telling everyone you walked over a very sharp cattle grid in an extremely heavy hat

<font size="1">Reboot.</font s> *Reboots into invisible/intangible Ghost Mode and Observes....*

Well spit and stomp glass, I thought Reboot was going to join the assault for a minute.

You know though...if you're going to hang around would you mind dropping a few supplies? We're abominably low on ice and warm beer just doesn't motivate the troops.

Battling the minions of chaos is thirsty work.

i'll take that warm beer thank you.

Hey, here's one of those minions now.
Sure thing db. We'll just knock a few of these bad boys back and watch my power siphon wreck havoc.

What about this giant guy, is he as smart as he looks?

i am no longer a minion i was fired. i'm sure there was a memo.

i know am allied with the forces of good, (and i use the term loosley.) at least until i get my revenge.

I thought it was Jim we don't want to mess with?

<shoots random isle workers>

Put your hands in the air and surrender, or become another victim of the legend that is Cobalt Kid!

(Outright arrogance usually gets the enemies riled up, after all)

<kicks flower pot>

OK, where's that little trollop? It's time to settle this thing. Viviane, honey...I'm hoooooooooooooome!

"3G!! You alright buddy?"

From over behind a pile of mortar and stone, "Ah heck yeah. That's sweet Billy, thanks for asking."

Cobalt looks at Yellow and cocks an eyebrow to denote curiosity.
Yellow Kid says, "Bob's got four black belts in the martial arts. Fashion is his passion but he loves the way he looks in a karate gi. Go figure."

Cobie chuckles at this, "heh heh - and here I thought he was huge and menacing before. Who knew he was hundred foot tall Bruce Lee?"

"Go ahead Cobie. We've got war Planet and her army neutralized. You ought to resolve this before the next issue or the fans are going to think this story arc is going to go on forever."

Do you honestly think I can be defeated, my relatives are the very Universe and reality you live in?

Release the dragons, it's time for the weapon!

IGRAINE! MORGAINE!

It's time to show them what power is all about!

It's about time!

Let's form a circle!

Morgaine, present the elixir!

(pours the elixir on the ground)

Let's begin!

Endless night fall
Blanket the world in your dark wall

Bring the fears of people come alive,
Make them so scared they can only die

Take my force into a new arc,
Cover their world in an endless dark

Now go! And do me well!

SURROUND LEGIONWORLD AND CAST MY SPELL!

(a thick black cloud envelopes Legion World, no light can shine through, screams of people being force to see their worst fears come alive fill the planet)

Yes! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

While they're up here, fighting me, the shadow is kill their people! And if they fight, it will strip them of their own shadows, which we all know is connected to their souls and if that goes, then they can't live!

HAHAHA!

Legionnaires!

I know you do not trust me, but Legion World is being covered in shadow, people are dying, you need to return to your planet, leave this place before their is nothing left, when you return, to your planet I will tell you all you need to know about the shadow!

a simple solar flare will take care of your whole planet!

See this is why, I fired you, you don't GET IT!

Everything started from a Fires of Creation, life, emotions, magic, science, all of it! My soul was created by the Fires, and Fires was created by the Mother Goddess, to whom I am the High Priestess of!

I could spit in the Time Trapper's face and he would just have to like it because my daddy one ups him!

You "flare" is nothing compared to the me, for after all, I was created to bring magic into the Universe.

Now that I've gone off on a tangent, your home is covered in a killing shadow, HA!

i'm what the shadows are afraid of.

Then maybe you should go down to your little planet with your friends, because THEE shadow is tearing your world apart, and as afraid you may make shadows, this one doesn't back down, it can't, only I can control it!

Umm...
We're called a Legion for good reason ladies. I'm reasonably sure our team mates are on the job already. Your help would (of course) be most welcome, Queen of Orkney.

*YK moves toward Vivian slowly speaking loudly and centering her attention on himself*

Look above you Priestess, I told you there was far more to my power than you guessed. Your sun grows small and your world will die in darkness. Would you live a day in a minute and a year in a day? I can spin this world so fast it'll tear itself to pieces.

I can steal the breath from your mouth, the blood from your heart, the ground from beneath your feet. You cannot harm me. Your power was a gift from dying deities while I was born to mine in fire and blood. I am the oldest comic character of all and YOU are a myth made real.

Do not test me.

yeah. what he said.

I always find it so...childish, how you must always "heroes" must bragg about your little talents.

Take my breath, I need not breath, take my blood, it justs flows.

Dear, I need not test you, because you have limits, I don't that's why you need a team.

Deities never die, we let you fools sink yourselves in holes!

Tell yourself you have nothing to fear, but will do you no good, I am here and you will have to come to terms that I am unstoppable.

And unlike you OLD MAN, I am immortal, never shall I be a myth, I'm legend in my own time!

your breath is legend.

I hate it when they think I'm bluffing.

(addressing the Legionnaires)

You are all morons!

My sisters and I come from a force you will never BEGIN TO COMPREHEND! None of you have the power to stop her, you can't even aggravate her!

This land isn't like any other, it needs nothing but the Goddess, and it has that, through Viviane, and if she invokes the Goddess, she need only think and this universe could collapse.

None of you should tell me that you can handle it, because you can't, now leave this place and deal with the shadow on your planet it grows in power!

hmmm i'm gonna go finda house to drop on her. or at least some buckets of water.

ok make that two houses.

You really want to die...fine...but I warned you pathetic worm, I fear my sister, and I've had worse periods than you!

that's a great visual.

GET OUT!

This is why I never became good, when you're good, you're an idiot!

Bob? Fastball special!

-A stick the size of a tree (probably was too) suddenly appears and swings toward Morgause-
!*POW*!
The sorceress is struck and knocked away...REALLY knocked away.

Damn! That's out of the park! Nice hit buddy. Faraway, I'm going to need you in a minute, bro.

*YK appears instantly before Vivian and grabs her by the belt. They disappear from view and reappear in deep space. War planet is a distant spinning disk.*

I told you my power has dimensions you've never guessed. We're thousands of miles away from your planet now girl. Your powers are based on the life force of your world, you'll die here if I leave you. You haven't hurt even one of us but you've destroyed your home, poisoned the air and brought ruin on your people. Where is the justice of your goddess?

End this crazy war of yours and we'll help you rebuild. Refuse and suffer the consequences.

I don't wear belts, only poison by touch robe ties, and you touched, the poison seeps through all material.

I don't need the War Planet, you really are a fool.

(waves hands and the stars begin to fall on Legion World)

I already died once, it doesn't happen twice.

Fighting my sister is smart, she's powerful and she'll be out of my hair.

Morgause was right, you are an idiot.

(releases a flesh eating virus on Yellow King and watches his skin immediately start falling off, teleports back to her castle where her people are striving in power and success)

Can't wait to hear how all that is "easily defeatable" and his skin falling off is all an "illusion." Heroes are so predictable, I don't even need magic to defeat them, just a brain, one of many things they lack.

*sigh*

Magic-users. Always so overconfident with their petty little rhymes...

*teleports back to the Mainframe*

Glitch - decloak protocol 36b.

*activates magic-absorbsion protocol at the MF, where the magic is absorbed and reemitted as light*

Give it maybe half an hour to finish, then between the field's loss of magic and the light, everything should be hunky-dory @ LW.

Aaaahhh-CHOO!!
-SNARFFF-
hack-spit!
Man I hate that stuff.

Stars back in place, LW has light again, everything's fine and Third Doctory

You miss the point - magic is nothing special, it's just undefined energy that you can tap because you're a metahuman - your little "rituals" mean nothing. And energy is my domain - nothing you can do can harm me.

Take Cobalt Kid and all fool enough to fight for him, and do as you will with them - I don't care. Continue to attack Legion World and I shall be forced to deal with you.

If Viv and Reboot are going beat on each other and say mean things about us, I'm going to take my kryptonite and ray guns and whiskey and leave. I hear the Inquisitor's been seen around Cramer's and I like it better there anyway. Plus I think I left the coffee pot on back at the Old HQ. It's probably all burned up and gross at the bottom of the pot by now, darn it.

Magic, energy... who needs 'em anyway. If the girls want to sit around in the dark on this dank little hovel and have their little estrogenized pity party, whatever... but I'd go easy on the magic. It's messing up your heads.

Cobie, Red Bee, Yellow King, disaster boy, I say we all go back and do what we're best at: sit around HQ getting drunk and "making plans." Morgause, you seem like a good egg, you're invited too. After we sober up, let's go find the Inquisitor and beat him up or something.

“You know all this new age stuff really makes me smile. Nice to see Reboot has at least some connection to logical reality”.

Activates the Faraway Force to deflect any harmful effects despite anything the so called magic welders cast in his way and walks up to Viv and Morgause

“I normally don’t do this to a lady but this has gone far enough”

Two swift punches to the jaw knock them out.

“quick Yellow Kid, whilst they are unconscious, get them to the cells in the security office, I think Matlock is there to check them in. I’ll just have a quick ermm word , yes that’s it word, with the Gay Green Giant”

<grabs Viv by the shoulders>

Viv, you better snap out of this! Things are getting heated and we don't want this rift to be permanent!

...

No...I see now that you're not yourself. There must be some other force at work here, making you act this way.

Reboot has stopped your stars from hitting LW and the battle is still raging on, but no one is winning anything here. Might be time for a new approach...

I believe, my friends, that Matlock is right! Shall we exit this place?

<heals Yellow Kid with healing powers>

YK, that oughta stop that skin disease. Not sure if you had a plan for that already, but I'm here...

Sure, thing, Cobie! I'm tired of getting beat up by a bunch of girls anyway...

*gets cuffed in the head by Igraine*

Look out, guys!

*crashes into Yellow Kid, Cobalt Kid, Faraway Lad and Matlock, sending them flying off the island*

Foolish, these Legion Worlders, be.

Even now, the darkness continues to spread again. It cannot be stopped.

Let them battle up here on the isle. I shall spill blood down below, as I did once before, and they shall once more shudder at the name of the Inquisitor.

Hello hotties! Am I fashionably late for this battle? Better than never!

*tee hee*

*grabs YK, Red Bee and Matlock, pulling them back up to the isle*

Hang on, lover, I'll grab you in a sec!

*titter of amusement*

On viewing the back pages of this thread,
it amused me greatly to see,
the High Priestess's weak attempts at poetry,
the old crone is so blah...*tee hee*

*picks up Faraway and Cobie*

Hm...have you been working out, Faraway? Your behind is tighter than usual!

Thanks Spacey!

<hangs on to her in very suspect places>

Bring us on down to the old HQ! It's time to exit this place!

Hmmm... I must have missed that. I can't recall ever shuddering at the name of the Inquisitor. I do remember being appalled by your table manners, though...

Oooo-kayyy...Timestamp 04.22.05
I can hold them in a kind of time stasis for just a little while (another nifty side effect of the super-spin) but it costs me tremendously, I can't hold them long. Believe me it's far easier to send someone spinning loose through the timestream than it is to hold them stationary.

Someone get one of the Dox's to prepare the power dampers!
Far! Space Tart! Transport us all to LW please?

I think I remember shuddering at the knowledge that the Inquisitor was a eunuch...

YK, I wonder where Mearl Dox is? She might be able to help!

On to LW ! See you there!

I can see where that sort of thing would bother you. It's one of your favorite parts

I act superior, because I am!

~wink~

Your powers no longer work on the shadow, and the shadow has been repaired!

I HAVE ENOUGH OF THE INSULTS, SCREW YOURSELVES!

Don't count on it, Mearl can only rule the universe, not control it.

See, here's the thing. Magic is energy, "stem cell energy" if you will, since it's characterised only by it's lack of inherent characteristics. You must expend SCE to maintain SCE in the state you want it in - an unattended SCE field (or "spell") will collapse into raw SCE again quickly.

Ergo, a "your powers don't work on it" is impossible. Unless you drop the SCE field completely, you'll be expending SCE constantly as part of the spell.

Ergo, I first drain the "maintainance SCE" of the "powers don't work" field like so...

Now I drain the mSCE of the shadow SCE field... like so.

Now I just set my machines on the spell as before to accelerate the field decay. And there's nothing you can do but pour more SCE in to try and maintain it, which just drains and distracts you.

And don't even bother trying any "spells" on me, eh. I can absorb the SCE before anything actually happens, and all you're doing is making me annoyed. And you wouldn't like me when I'm annoyed. And I have SCE absorption fields around the Mainframe and any vaguely important stuff.

Science is superior to "magic"

To interrupt for a second, you don't mess around with Jim and you don't mess with Bill.

According to Jim Croce and Martha & The Vandellas, respectively. (Or was it the Marvellettes? Motown girl groups get me confused.)

Anyway, back to the mayhem....

You people are idiot, one invites me in, one tries to punch me, you insult my sister.

Reboot, you nitwit, our people master magic, we also master, reality, the mind, science, time, energy, so you, SHUT UP! You'll make her made, she is over a few milleniums old you cluck!

Ag, put a Reboot in it

*throws RB hologram at you, and thus reboots you into a overweight turtle, before teleporting you back to your godforsaken planet*

Should take your sister a couple of minutes to fix that. Oh, and..

*teleports note after you*



Forksaken Viviane,

You may have noticed that I turned your sister into an overweight turtle recently. Now, I don't expect that to last, as I'm sure even a witch can reverse that, given a little effort. Take it more as a symbol of my intent than of a meaningful gesture in it's own right.

Cobalt Kid was not the only one I prepared protocols on how to defeat recently. You are beings of Stem Cell Energy, and thus ripe for reprogramming as I desire. If you do not cease to irritate me forwith, I shall turn you all into Cobalt Kid's mindless slaves, a fate which I'm sure you will agree would be worse than death.

You have 24 hours to comply (I have locked timestream access for the next 48). I advise you to concede, and cease to irritate the deniziens of this planet not named, or loyal to, Cobalt Kid.

Yours never

Reboot.

allright.

it's time to get dirty.

being late to a battle really does annoy me.

Personally, "Late" is my favorite time to arrive at a battle.

Reboot, I nor is anyone I am related to, a witch.

I'm not going to bother trying to explain myself or my superiorty over you, because your tiny mind couldn't began to understand the reality.

You can continue to dream.

Morgause! I hate you! I thought Reboot turned you into a turtle! Oh, it was a rock, I thought Reboot was blind.

Can someone get rid of all these empty posts, sorry?

And neither can you. You're not "thousands of years old," you're not "High Priestess" of anything.

Several months ago, your (and your sisters') metahuman power to channel SCE activated. Unable to deal with it, you snapped *clicks fingers* and dreamed up this "Mother Goddess" malarky. Then Cobalt used his chip the other week and made things worse.

Snap out of it and stand down. Or else.

i think it's time "reboot" certian characters...don't you agree Reboot?

Indeed

*tosses you in an unreality bubble*

I hate being disturbed by minions...

i hope you were talking about viv

Aren't Minions a snack chip?

If not, they should be.

Good minions are hard to find in any age. If only Disaster Boy would choose a color.

It looks like the War Planet adventure is wrapped up. All that's left is to authorize a team of Science Police to take over and see if there's enough left here to rebuild.

So...Legion Cruiser or Transmat? Personally I like the Cruiser, if I remember right there's still a file on the computer with the specs to build a new Supergirl Robot.

don't you people know that minions have sensitive egos?


sheesh.

Currently I have all the minions I need but we're always watching for new colors out there in super hero/villian land y'know. There's even a Secondary Color Squad out there somewhere but last I heard they were off tackling some problem of their own.
...if by chance you should decide to give it a shot feel free to drop by 3G's shop at the mall in Brightonopolis and I'm sure he'll be happy to give you a tryout. The pay IS pretty good, medical, dental, a 401k, and fatalities are rare.

Nothing is over!

You can't defeat me!

(teleports the War Planet out of this exsistence, leaving the "goodies" behind)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Reboot eats poop.

(that was a glitched post.)

umm yk, before i get my feathers in a ruffle what exactly is your definition of a "minion"?

by the way i prefer blood red leather or jet black leather.

Told ya.
As soon as the Cruiser gets back to LW we're going to have to look into this Faraway Lad problem. I'm either having withdrawals or I really did see a ghost that looked like Far.
Something else else's up.

A huge ghostly apparition of Faraway appears in front of the cruiser, the hand upright in a warning gesture.

“Hey what the …..” Says a startled Yellow Kid as he viscously swerves the cruiser to avoid the phantasm.

“Now you’ve really done it” snarls Outdoor Miner.

Yellow turns around to see OM standing there soaked in beer as the glasses he was carrying have spilt over him during the emergency turn.

Turning back to the view screen to hide his grin, Yellow says

“Sorry OM but I had to turn to avoid that” pointing at the monitor Yellows grin fades as the monitor and the trip log show no record of the projection of Faraway.

But it was there OM honestly, Hey even I know better to spilt your pint man” says a bewildered Yellow Kid much later as a thorough diagnostic shows nothing wrong with the ships systems

After the near miss with the apparition of Faraway Lad YK is quite shaken. His power nearly exhausted and wounded from the battle he assumed the vision was the work of his imagination...and yet something was still terribly wrong.
Medicus One was near and maybe there he could get some answers he desperately needed. If the medical staff at Med-1 couldn't help then maybe nobody could but "By DAMN!" they were Legionnaires and they'd do whatever it took to save their companion.

Next!-
You know the Legion and you believe in science. Everything you know is wrong! Could this be the doom of the Legionnaires?

The Ghost of Faraway Lad! (in a comic shop near YOU)...unless you happen to be Vivian and there IS no comic shop near you.

Overcome with rage at the demise of his overlord Hrun has used his natural power of invulnerability to magic and magic users to find the way to the war planet, despite the priestesses spells, Once there Hrun uses the heavy black rocks full of bluestone and iron into the magic well, thus cutting Viv off from the source of most of her powers. Hefting his heavy axe he walks across to the steaming caldron that seems to produce most of the mists surrounding this war world and kicks it over, the hot liquid inside swiftly dosing the fire beneath. Losing its power sources the unholy war world crashes into the surface of Legion World, its defences shattered and now lies open to the final assault by the LMBP

*watches below with magic binoculars from Cafe Cramer*

Go get 'em, Hrun! That barbarian sure doesn't sit around.

I guess were approaching a point of progress. The question now is, should I be a backround player for Hrun's assault, or keep defending the Cafe as a backround player?

Cmh, Buh!

Mmmf hhnh hmm hunf hm nn m hmmfhm mppfhm!

(Translation: "C'mon, Bee! This is your chance to be a frontline fighter!")

Aw, what the hell?

*Runs head long into battle*

Bees, attack every Priestess you can!

I have a feeling I'm going to end up getting punched right in the face...

"Good, tis a noble Red shirt"

Shouts Hrun as he moves towards the sacred grove.

Passing another scryving pool He upends the sacrificial altar spilling the grisily remains of an animal augury into the pool turning it a vivid red colour.

"Hurry my freind, use these bees to find these evil sorcerous crones, Tis a mockery of the old religions to use such bloodthirsty mummery"

Hrun bellows with rage, his large muscles staining under the chain mail, his barrel chest pounding with anger, his arms flung out wide.

Unfortunatly in his eagerness to help Red Bee chose just this moment to run forward, as he did so he ran straight into Hruns large powerful arms and was knocked flat.


"OW! dy dose"

>pop<

need help?

KOWABUNGA!!
From the sky falling at terminal velocity a huge green streak smashes powerfully into the ground. Dirt and rock explode in a shower of debris rising a mile into the air. Immediately by a second impact follows, nearly as powerful.
3G stends and roars he battele cry, "Get out here you bitch!"

Blue Mutha stands in place in the impact crater and starts a rhythmic pounding on the ground
Boom!
Boom!
Boom!
Boom!
Boom!(hey it worked against the Trapper)

The ground shudders and buckles under the assault. Waves of power ripple thrugh the ground.
The Giant kicks, stomps and shatters everything in his path. He scatters a handful of devices from his pouch and a wave of explosions runs through the area. Pieces fly in all direction.
The very world groans with pain as a fissure opens and widens along their path of desrtruction.

Boom!
Boom!
Boom!
Boom!
...

(Note to self: Ask if Blue Mutha would like to play drums for Calamity.)

Hrun, heads for a small building and starts to burn the thatched roof.

As the fire takes hold the door bursts open and out runs........

<watches from afar>

The witch has not made a move against the LMBP yet...I wonder what she has in store for them.

This will afford me the perfect opportunity to destroy the residence of my hated enemy, Fat Cramer. My revenge on Blockade Boy and Cobalt Kid was grand, but this shall be glorious.

Perhaps I can snuff out some more of these LMBPers, as I did that helpless reporter, Giant Squid.

There shall be fire on Legion World...

*raids through Viviane's closets*

Is, like, everyTHING in black?

*tee hee*

Between Hrun, Gay Green Giant, Space Tart and Yellow Kid, we're not doing so bad so far!

*trips*

Er...I could always go join Matlock and search for the Royal Inquisitor. Or help solve that mystery.

*ducks away from falling debris*

That actually doesn't sound so bad right now...

um, this place is so negative, time to blow it up!

BOOM!