Today I (Imaginary version 2)

... arranged and paid for a Meet-up of all Legion Worlders at this years San Diego Comic Con.

... brought dried mangoes and fresh coconut and roast pig from the Philippines for everyone

...was praised by all Ibby's pals for how I rocked my sexy two-piece on the beach!

... Saw Philippine social media explode with the hashtag #cleomeHottie

this is the "imaginary" version.

[sings]

"Imagine all the swimsuits,
Fitting perfectlyyyy
You may say I'm a dreamer,
But I'm not the only one..."

... Hosted a mega ball to introduce cleome to Philippine society

Originally Posted by Invisible Brainiac

... Saw Philippine social media explode with the hashtag #cleomeHottie

Originally Posted by Blockade Boy

this is the "imaginary" version.

It COULD happen if cleome were ever to visit. It would take a while for me to be able to sponsor her visit here though, hence making this imaginary.

... left in the TARDIS

... returned in after spending 5 years traveling in the TARDIS.

... Booked a vacation that will take me to every single country in the world over 2 years

With nearly 200 countries in the world, I imagined IB could fit a week's work of activities and sight seeing into a day.

All that "moving at the speed of light" really helps

But I would like to take my time on vacation.

... made my debut at the Metropolitan Opera House.

...brought a dozen roses to Quislet, Esq.'s dressing room.

... became Quislet's No. 1 fan and attended all his shows!

Removed a hidden microchip from underneath my fingernails

...met my identical twin

...can't wait to throw my buckets of cash at the Black Friday machine! In fact, I'm so excited that I'm not even bothering with sleep for the next three days!

... ate a tomato and liked it.

... Had to regrow my eyes

... danced my way out of a fight.

... gave birth.

... initiated a hostile takeover of my company.

.... used my dog as a pillow

...won a drinking contest

... was not at all annoyed to have the dog in the other room wake me up with her loud barking, while the dog in my room was a perfect angel and let me sleep peacefully

...retrained The Sid to be a sweet, cuddly lap cat who never claws, bites, steals food off the counter or bullies his roommate.

... turned down 5 offers by handsome millionaires to sleep with them.

... had the best, long, restful sleep ever

... became the sole heir of a rich relative I never heard of.

... destroyed the Islamic State

... started my new hobby of building model ships in a bottle. I finally found a big enough bottle to fit me.

... invented a new means of communication: reflecting sunlight even at night using giant spectacles

... I saw Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump making out.

...learned to grill a steak.

... got over my bacterial infection

...ate my weight in cheeseburgers.

... learned to speak Spanish, French, Russian, German, Japanese and Telugu.

... seceded from the United States and started my own country of Quislandia

...moved to Quislandia

... gives Kappa Kid the guest bedroom and puts a cap on immigrants.

planned an invasion.

... learned to fly

... took a vote on whether Quislandia should rejoin the US. The vote was inconclusive.

... formed my own modern-day Legion of Super-Heroes with the blessings of the United Nations, and gained citizenship to every U.N. member and then some.

I also came out as gay publicly, single-handedly changing world opinion and making the LGBT community accepted by heterosexuals everywhere.

My wedding to Blaze will be televised and everyone on Legion World is invited, free lodging and plane fare.

... ate a tomato.

... learned to fly

...got my own TV show

... mastered my seventh language

... achieved godhood.

... usurped Quis' position

... took the first steps to become a historian.

... sprouted wings

Kung fu chopped Hong Kong Phooey

Became a model

... engineered a fake alien invasion to get all of humanity to finally work together, damn it!

...accepted House Beautiful's invitation to have my place featured in their special "Hippies In The Sticks & Their Funny Little Dwellings-- How Quaint!" issue.

... was named "Sexiest Asian Man Alive!"

... watched the live action Legion movie. It was awesome!

... delivered ravens to the Queen

... swam for my university team

.... have a hot date with my university swim team

... will film Myg's hot date

...understand it all.

.... starred as Quislet in the Live Action sequel to the Legion movie.

... had a private party with six hot Europeans

... filmed Ibby's private party

... started a movie studio with Myg.

... worked on distribution deals for the movie studio Ibby and I have

... signed a merchandising contract for Myg and Ibby and Blaze action figures

...wrote something brilliant in this thread.

... cloned myself on the boards.

...hired Ibby's clones out as tech support for wealthy but computer-illiterate old people.

... formed a labor union to resist Kent's unsavory labor practices

...wrote this whole labor dispute up in Counterpunch for the princely sum of 50 cents a page.

... signed a contract to play myself in a movie about my union exploits

... revealed on Legion World that I am really Paul Levitz

... met my future self, and had a nice long discussion about keeping my my priorities in life

... cleared out my storage space.

.... caught a leprechaun and got a pot of gold

...skipped showering because showering is bourgeois.

... caught a leprechaun and got his lucky charms.

... gained super powers by eating lucky charms

....nipped over to Boston to borrow Quislet, Esq.'s shower because mine isn't working.

... took a nice, long, three-hour bath

Originally Posted by cleome50

....nipped over to Boston to borrow Quislet, Esq.'s shower because mine isn't working.

Did you have to take it back to Portland?

... designed a portable shower for easy lending

... went to Portland to see what the fuss was about

...got beaten up, arrested and removed trying to take my seat on a United flight to Portland.

... became a household name for yelling at the security people who were beating Kent up on the United flight

... posted the video I took of Ibby and Kent to youtube

...was too scared of the rain and mud to go outside at all.

... decided to become a movie director

... got ready for my audition for Ibby's next movie

...am tackling the dishes first thing in the A.M., instead of sulking and stalling like I usually do.

... free over to spend a week visiting with cleome and helping her with chores

... founded my own country

... quit school and went to work for a fashion magazine

...logged on before feeding the cat.

... decided to drop out of school

... really wanted to avoid going to the gym

... changed the world

... dreamed a lot

... exposed the alien lizards that have infiltrated the world governments.

...am wide awake and rarin' to go on all my chores.

... solved global hunger.

... went on a mission of vengeance against corrupt politicians

... figured out how to operate with only 4 hours of sleep

... used an old lamp and broken laptop to make myself a cyborg

...have decided to just lounge in the hot tub 'til noon, sipping Pina Coladas and planning my next jaunt to The Bahamas.

... emerged for cleomo's subconscious into reality

... popped fully formed out of Quis's forehead

... was relieved of a splitting headache

... continued to annoy Quis by tapping on his shoulder for the rest of the day

... published my best-selling novel

...got my 2 millionth Like on YouTube for that vid where I was dressed like Supergirl & bouncing a quarter off my abs.

... decided to become a vegan

... finished reading every book in the Boston Public Library

... starred in my very first porn video. I must say, that camera does add 10 pounds. Good thing I've been working out... "admires lean muscly body"

... married the richest man in the world

... killed a dragon

...ate a whole pound of bacon by myself. [burrrrp!!]

... worked out so hard I threw up

...learned the complete works of Queen Ida on my new accordion. Bon Ton Roulet!

... twirled around until there was a blast of thunder and a bright flash of light. I then made sure my tiara was on right and my hair was in place.

... went to Taiwan to get gay-married!

... discovered coffee, which I am willing to share with the world so that we can get to our next step on the evolutionary ladder

...blew off my necessary trip to the DMV so I could chat with Myg "Coffee Emperor" Andy S at Ibby's wedding reception.

(Coffee with Dim Sum? A bit unorthodox, but I'll cope. Hope my gift passes muster with the grooms.)

... was so happy with Cleome's gift that I invited her and mr cleome to meet up with us for the part of our honeymoon. How do you fancy visiting Iceland?

...get my passport readied for my pending trip to Iceland. Woo!

(I just need to find a neighbor who'll tend to The Sid and the plants while we're gone.)

... volunteered to tend The Sid and the plants while the cleomes venture with the Ibby/Blaze contingent

... sent Myg a nice gift for helping make sure that cleome could join us!

... completed my Bachelors of Boston collection. Gotta catch them all!

... published my best-selling novel, saw my first movie premiere, had my first shirtless magazine cover come out, and got asked to host the next Oscars.

...am back from my whirlwind tour of the Tropics, boasting a superb tan & a lucrative new job modeling swimsuits for the 50+ set.

... discovered that superheroes are real. They are! They are!

... laughed about the superheroes are real prank I just pulled.

...am waiting for 4 o'clock to come so I can go home.

... bought a new car

... experienced Nirvana

... came out publicly by posting a picture of myself at Gay Pride on Facebook

... finished all our group work for the term

Originally Posted by Invisible Brainiac

... came out publicly by posting a picture of myself at Gay Pride on Facebook

In the Russell Crowe movie "The Sum of Us", a character does come out when his parents see him on television dancing on a float in the Sydney Gay Mardi Gras

... saw the jar holding my brain

... put Quislet's brain in the body of a beautiful actress

...took Quislet's old body out for snacks and a matinee'. That other brain informs me that it loves marinara sauce on its cheese sticks AND that Tom Cruise is a real pain the butt to work with.

... had dinner with the 93 BFFs I made at my MBA program

...paid the bill for IB's dinner party, complete with the 25% gratuity. It's the least I could do.

... secretly hid $1,000,000.00 in cleome's house.

... thanked cleome and Quis for being so generous!

... wrote a Pulitzer Prize winning novel.

... made an army of gay zombies

... solved the mystery of Jack the Ripper.

... turned into a ghost and haunted this asshole that I dislike

... had to hire an exorcist to get rid of this ghost haunting me.

... realized I went and haunted the wrong house...

... became king of the world. Then the ship I was on sunk.

... figured out the best way to make an omelette. Oh, I'm going to be world-famous!

Originally Posted by Invisible Brainiac

... figured out the best way to make an omelette. Oh, I'm going to be world-famous!

How many eggs did you break?

One phoenix egg and one golden goose egg

... rode my pet elephant to work.

... won the lottery and left on a journey around the world

... moved to Tibet to become the next Sorceror Supreme

Received ten job offers.

... ate all the leftover cake from the Royal wedding

... was voted Sexiest Bachelor Alive

... walked naked through the town to protest taxes.

... switched lives with my cat.

... grew a second head

...got caught up on all my reading.

... sent Fat Cramer a trunk load of new books

... qualified for the next Olympic games

...am no longer unable to see the forest for the trees.

... Made it to the finals of Eurovision, representing my adopted countries France AND Spain!

... had my album go platinum!

... adopted ten little dogs

... met the men of my dreams. We're entering a three-way marriage next week

...got paid to not work.

... stole a painting from the Rijksmuseum

... made a 1/5th scale of the Eiffel Tower out of cheddar cheese.

... published my own cookbook

...met one of Santa's elves

...got a bunch of important stuff done instead of blowing it all off until tomorrow.

... earned enough money to retire early

... yelled "I object!" at a wedding and ran off with the groom.

... made off with the groom’s younger twin brothers

... sunk a battleship

... found a new boyfriend

... provided the smocking gun

... used the smocking gun to paint

... flew to Mauritius for a friend's wedding, then hopped over to Chile for another - stopping in Peru on the way to see my best friend from school (who was also invited to both Mauritius and Chile weddings).

At least, that's the plan after the world becomes normal again

...broke into the Art Museum and helped myself to that one gorgeous bronze nude I always wanted.

Sure, my back hurts like you wouldn't believe, but hey my living room's never looked classier.

... sunbathed nude in the sun, although with social distancing I had to do it in my apartment building's garden. Luckily, many of the neighbors are also gay men, so they appreciated it... not like the rest...

...published the novel I've been writing

... shaved off all my body hair

...drank some Miracle-Gro so my whole body would be covered with a lush green grassy pelt.

... gave away all my possessions and started hiking to Tibet to hide out from the coronavirus pandemic

...grew to 100 feet tall.

... finished the boring work thing that I have been putting off

... jumped into the canal outside my living room window

Originally Posted by Invisible Brainiac

... gave away all my possessions and started hiking to Tibet to hide out from the coronavirus pandemic

...really missed Ibby, so I used my magic powers to wipe out the virus and all its mutations.

... thanked cleome by inviting her on an around-the-world-trip to see all the places that opened up again!

...filled out and mailed 10,000 cool postcards, which will probably arrive at their destinations after I return home.

(Even in the future, some things don't ever change.)

... bought three houses in my three favorite cities!

...finally got that DIY discotheque set up in the living room! I'm excited! (Now I just have to wait for the arrival of that rhythm I ordered online.)

... jumped from the roof onto a passing boat!

Went to work in a bridal gown, and brought along a bouquet of flowers for the bus driver.

... was adopted by two 50-year old gay men

...did not grow feverishly impatient waiting on a to-go plate of vegetarian nachos.

... had to storm into the offices of my Internet provider to get them to turn the signal to my house on

...didn't indulge in any delicious cookies OR adorable cat videos. Nope. That kind of thing is all in the past now.

... cloned myself and transferred my consciousness into the new body, the current body is beginning to show its age

...opted to sleep normal hours instead of posting my usual heap of nonsense.

... enjoyed a snow day outside, naked. I've lost a few appendages, but it was worth it!

...look forward to a doctors' follow-up test/visit next week. No really. I sense only good things in my future.

X_X

... gave cleome a real hug, instead of just a virtual one

...got all the doctor bills paid AND all the utilities too, so it's cracked crab and chilled champagne for EVERYBODY!!

... brought some Singaporean chili crab and Japanese sake to cleome's party!

...found a patch of sun and a pile of pillows, and will laze in them belly-up until dinnertime, just like the cat.

... went swimming in the freezing cold waters of the Amsterdam canals

... went skating on the freezing cold ice of the Amsterdam canals

... walked my polar bear on the freezing cold ice of the Amsterdam canals

...tamed a coyote I met on an evening stroll through the park.

... got into a flame war on the Internet, reached through my screen, and punched the guy who would not leave me alone after being asked twice politely.

...hid Ibby from the Internet Gendarmes

... became a master of disguise with cleome's help

...got my 100 millionth *like* on YouTube for my series of how-to-master-disguises-the-quick-and-easy-way videos.

... exfoliated my face. I look 10n years younger!

...found out that orthopedic shoes are not only hip and sexy now, but also super-affordable! Now I can be all excited about my fitting for them next week yee-hawwww!!!

... invented something to magically cure cavities

...hung out with Uncle Roger on YouTube learning how to cook Chinese food like a pro!

... started my own cooking channel and did a collab with Uncle Roger!

...signed a contract to do a comic book collab with Roger Stern.

... read every book in the public "library" in my building!

...skipped work so I could finish my monthly art output on schedule. Everyone is very understanding about my priorities in life.

... bought a new wardrobe, as I got too fat for my old clothes

...successfully negotiated with Netflix to do the unfinished, unaired 4th season of GLOW as a graphic novel.

... actually enjoyed ironing clothes!

...have met all my deadlines and can face next month in perfect contentment.

... woke up bright and early at 5am!

...will fix myself an elaborate dinner rather than just another bowl of peaches with yogurt.

... will go fetch the family dogs from across the Pacific and bring them here to live with me

...continue last night's precedent and enjoy a complex and lovingly curated lunch... as opposed to just being bleary-eyed at quarter to seven this morning and throwing random crap in a bag that will spoil by Saturday A.M. if I don't shove it in my face-hole today.

... slept exceedingly well, yes sir and yes ma'am! I am not the least bit tired!

...did not hear my neighbors next door getting lucky (and sounding a lot like asthmatic water buffalos) while I tried to enjoy my damn coffee.

... did not check to see that we weren't making such loud noises when we're getting lucky...

...actually got my pre-sliced breakfast bagel to come apart evenly, without it crumbling to pieces!

... got promoted and took over the company

...sold my start-up for millions and retired to the tropics.

... passed out on the couch all night (I only passed out for like half an hour!)

...have already done so much important stuff! I'm blowing my OWN mind!!

... headlined a fashion show. Yes! I know! During COVID! we livestreamed it and had individual runways for every model!

...grew an extra pair of hands. This will be very helpful when I go back to the office. Even if my clothes don't fit quite as well.

... got COVID. (thankfully, I've been tested twice and it's not, so I assume I just have a bad cold!)

...shipped Ibby some of Mom's delicious homemade chicken and Matzo ball soup.

... thanks cleome by sending her a year's supply of art materials

...drew mustaches on all the downtown billboards and statues while "Woo hoo" ing like Daffy Duck.

Thank you, Ibby for your patronage. I'm gonna' be even bigger than Banksy!

(Uh, once my lawyer gets here with the bail money.)

...finally wrote that book about the life and career of my favorite Golden Age animation director, Art Davis (1905-2000)

Originally Posted by cleome55

...drew mustaches on all the downtown billboards and statues while "Woo hoo" ing like Daffy Duck.

Thank you, Ibby for your patronage. I'm gonna' be even bigger than Banksy!

(Uh, once my lawyer gets here with the bail money.)

LOL Watch out for Police Officer Porky Pig!

... Dressed a pig up as a police officer, but my pig didn't wear it as well as Porky would!

...Became a minor deity in an obscure pantheon.

... deleted my Facebook...

hah! made you look!