His real life one ended up being kind of lame, so we must therefore throw him one 1,000 years in the future!

Tying it all together, I shall dress as Marty McFly!

This is getting pretty heavy!

http://rubypr.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/pretty-in-pink.jpg

Howard Jones has declined to perform because his doctor advised him that if he ever uses hair spray again, his cranium will collapse. However, Howie Mandel said if we supply the rubber gloves, he'll give us 15 minutes.

I'm liquidating my retirement funds just to make sure that we have enough of those little gold spoons!

I'm sure that if we took up a collection for cab fare and tacos, we could hire Duran Duran.

Tommy Lee might actually show up uninvited.

I got him some parachute pants!

I'm going to lead everyone in a chorus of "Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?" when we smash open the piñata.

<span style="font-size: 11px;">(Because my answer to that question has always been, "Yes.")</span>

I'll bring the Purple Rain video tape. VHS or Beta?

Hopefully this party isn't taken over by cocaine and Reagan fanatics!

Keeping with my "metal" theme, I've hit all the thrift stores in town and bought metallic "leather" accessories for everyone to wear.

Jerry, this "bronzed" vinyl snake belt and matching handbag are like totally you!

Is the snake's name Boa George? I swear to God, I had a friend who really had a snake with that name in the 80s. And Boa made it to a lot of the parties.

Matching bronzed vinyl? Hmm. Did someone mention cocaine?

I didn't know anyone who kept a pet snake back then, but our yard did yield the occasional garter snake. That was about it.

Oh, and did you ever spray paint instead of bronze? I swear to God, I had a roommate spray paint her vinyl belt, hat, and pumps red one night in the 80s. No cocaine involved. She looked hot. Really. Very Pointer Sisters.

I'll hit the local Salvation Army to see if I can find Jeans jackets for everyone.

Nah. I clung to my beige LeSportSac until it disintegrated. I was <strike>boring</strike> stubborn like that.

But The Pointer Sisters were one of those rare Eighties things that I actually loved, even before I found out that they started out singing jazz.

I wonder if we can afford to book them...

They're here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h-LbvFckptY

Now, this is the coolest 80s party ever.

The Pointer Sisters were smokin' hot!

"I'm just burnin' doin' the Neutron Dance!!"
"...'cause your friends don't dance, and if they don't dance, they're no friends of mine!"
"Dancehall days, love!"
"Dance, little sister!"
"I'll tumble 4 ya!"
"Don't stop, don't stop the dance!"

I hope it's okay to revive all the lost Ben 'N Jerry's flavors for this party, like Fresh Georgia Peach and Wild Maine Blueberry.

I mean, it's only in our minds, so no weight gain is possible, right?