Ah wont do a damn thang. I'll take Futah kang as mah runnin' mate.

And tha fuhst pahson thet triz ta mak'uz, ahll cut own tha 'lectric fat sucka and waccum out deyah brainzzzzz!

an ah dowhn't wont no votes, needer!

If you don't vote for Rick, it means you hate freedom, democracy and cute puppies.

If you don't vote for Rick, Errorists win.

<is there any way we can block up this door with crates of cigars and old comic books?>

dayum dirtah polyticians alreadah rahzort'n ta dirdy trix.

oh, wait. Fanfie and Tempy are both running? never mind.

I thought errorists was referring to Cobies spelling...

Thar ya go pebble... polyticians dun be thang'in agin.... iz all wrong ah tellz ya.

Nex thang ya knows, they'll be wannin' yer kids ta be studahlyzin' en stuff. Cats'll be sleepin wid dowgz, sky'zl be yaller, and wadder'l be dry'n up evahwhar...

That "studahlyzin'" part scares me....

Is the root "study" or "stud" or....?

And what exactly is "en stuff"? and ehy would anyone want to be "studahlyzin" it?

thar ya go, pebble, polyticians dun whant'ya ta nod queshtun thangs... jess excep whut they'z tellin' ya.

Whal.. ah prahmiz, ya wont have nuttin' ta queshtun wid me an Futuah, we won't do nuddin'

Can we vote rickshaw into Congress?

nawp, uh'm ovahquali...ovahqwal....ah'm too gud fer tha job.

Renember... ah vote fah me iza potetentile targuht onyer back.

Help! I think!??

"Potetentile" is my new favorite word.

Rick is THIS your new Chinese accent that you've been thinking about trying out?
Very nice job bro'! I like it!!!

KEEP IT GOING OK?????

Shirtless photo of Rick holding a can of beer wins my vote.
Make it happen!!

Ah caint's post thet, muh wife'd start goin' uff on how I'Z tryin' ta be flurtin' wit women's and mens fer tah get dey votes.

Howevah, I wuld post'a pic ah hellpuppy drankin' a baer. Drunk dogz, nah' thet's jus' funnah!

This is good. You should work in a Chinese resaurant. Noone would notice the subtle inflections in your honkey voice!

Dangumit, boyah, ah ain't no chines, uh suthun. Go get'ya sum lernin!

Correct that, you sound like drunken Chinaman! Ah-so, ah-so!!!

Uh-oh, I just thought of something (yes, I'm a bit slow folks!) ...
Should I really be dissing my non-running mate during these erectorial candyassies?

Lahkah said. Ged'yu sum larnin'.

Larnin' just sold out at the drug store ... something about a crazyassed cowboy with a pirate accent running in and buying up the rest of the "larnin" off the adult supply shelf.

Raspberry!

Wahl, dangleberrah to ewe two. Dang runnun mate needs ta loin dey plaz. Whar's muh haindlah's... taz'em boyahs.

So THIS is how you treat your faithful running mate, not to mention comic relief/sidekick???

Thizziz a bid fah naw powah... godder toe tha line thar, hossenfeffer!

Hossenfeffer???

Voters, do you think that two running mates who are so obviously besotted with each other will take time to look out for your interests? Beware, I say. This is a love that dare not speak -- I say, cannot even spell -- its name.

Do you want this as a role model for your Super-Pets?

Do you?

[Paid for by the Concerned & Slanderous Citizens of Legion World. George Haussenpheffer, Treasurer.]

Well dang gum, thar, feller, did'nt not ya red mah platfam? Houah intrest's is nought usin' powah.

At least you're passionate about SOMETHING!

Don't try to change the subject, "Hoss."

pplltt!

Also, please explain the use of the word "besotted" in you previous post.

(this outta be good!)

Well, on rare occasions I was sotted with beer, but that was way long years ago.

Oh is THAT all it means! *whew*

be·sot·ted
transitive verb
1: infatuated
2: to make dull or stupid; especially : to muddle with drunkenness

The intent in the previous post was primarily the first definition, but no doubt includes the second.

[Paid for by the Concerned & Slanderous Citizens of Legion World. George Haussenpheffer, Treasurer.]

You know, unless this is in the official thread, I'm not sure you guys are officially running yet!

And for that, you may just have my vote!

"Dadblastit! Didn'tnot it plainlah state uh ain't gonna doo nuttin... wid da orifice!"

Please excuse him everyone, he's missing quite a few of his teeth ..... it makes his speech rather slurred and, well, choppy and hard to understand!

Plus he's usually chewing gum or chewin' tabbacy, so it makes it that much worse.
Forgive.

Ah gon git da gadblame dummit yea'rs widdmablay'e, s'whudamagonnado!

See what I mean?

A free beer at Cobie's lounge if you can translate that.

Time ta make ya bones.

Hmmmmmm..... I give up!

" Ah gon git da gadblame dummit yea'rs widdmablay'e, s'whudamagonnado!"

Translation:

"I'm going to get the dadblamed gum out your ears with my blade, is what I'm going to do about it."

In order for this candidacy to count, you must declare your candidacy in the Election Discussion Thread, headlined at the top of the forum. You have until tomorrow, 12:34 EST.

*takes long drink of thunderbird wine*

"Ewe cayn't teyall me whut'dado. Aaaaah'll... aaaaaah'll ...aaaaah'll piddle onyer fud is whaddall do..."

Rick dear, I can't understand a word you're typing these days...

Unfortunately I think it's catching!

Remember, a vote for Rockhopper Lad is a vote for easy-to-read, properly-spelled posts!

Check out them pearly whites! Were you brushing with baking soda again Rocky?

Ah nevah trust ah grinnin' polytician. They's just distrakin' ya from pickin' yah pocket.


THEF'S ALLADEM!

Just say it out loud, fast. That'll help.

Meh ha git golly, rickshaw1!

Ta'fer harp'fer tang blik'a wup wup!

Ram Boy, how many times do I gotta tell ya to stay the hell out of the Rick's stash of moonshine!?

Especially since I lace it with rat poison for that extra little kick we love so much here in the south.

Rat poison???? I thought that was vermouth!

Here in the south, pretty much the same thing.

You really thought that "XXX" and the skull painted on the jug meant vermouth?

Yes, well I AM Canadian!

Beside "moonshine" is another name for turpintine up here.

And what's wrong with drinking turpentine? Puts hair on yer dangles.

Oh noooo..., there's nothun' roong wit, ahmmm shuuur.
*hic*


P.S. I'm Greek. What the heck do I need more hair on my chest for? It only hides all my gold chains.

So that you can transplant it to yer bald spot, of course.

That's a terrible thing to say to a man who's balding like I truly am!
Now I don't like you anymore ....
Because I'm vain.
And it's all about me.
Always has been, always will be.

So now you're past and future king?

I didn't know Arthur was Italian.... go figure.

Oh good, you truly have a good grasp on your timelines. Excellent!

Greeks, Italians, tomatoe, tommato.... South Carolina, North Carolina.
Educated, uneducated. Hick, Rick ..... it's all relative.

Awright, now. mah vp can't be running our ticket down fer tha votin's over...

You're the greatest!

yes. yes I am.

And also modest, good looking, smart, handsome, funny, punny and intelligent!


Uh-oh ... I hope I'm not contributing to the whole "bro-mance" suspicions that some on here seem to think we're having!

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE OUT THERE!!!

"And also modest, good looking, smart, handsome, funny, punny and intelligent!"

Got him fooled...

Who you callin' fool FOOL?

That was a horrible Mr. T impersonation.

Mr. T? That was supposed to be George Sanford!

Wahll, thet just makes it worse.

Everyone's a critic!

had a tick on mah butt, which seems appropriate. hazards of being a timberman.

Ooops, I think you just shared too much again!