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#930859 - 06/05/17 05:41 AM Re: PostZH Legion: Mystical Mountains [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
Joined: Aug 2006
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Set Offline
I swore I'd die for you, I never meant like this.
Set  Offline
I swore I'd die for you, I never meant like this.

Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 8,109
Originally Posted by Invisible Brainiac
Glad you are enjoying my writing, Set! That inspires me to write more! smile


Yay!

I've been trying to write, but the story, while finished in my head, needs a ton of work and development of the middle parts, and I'm just too un-disciplined in my dotage.


Wrapped Around Your Finger now complete in BITS!
#930874 - 06/05/17 07:28 AM Re: PostZH Legion: Mystical Mountains [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Invisible Brainiac Offline
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Wouldn't you like to know?
I can relate. I plotted my Volume 2 and Volume 3 (broad strokes anyway, many details such as Monstress or the Monitor or the inclusions of Mentalla, Insect Queen, Tenzil and Dragonmage came later!) while I was still writing Volume 1. So the whole idea took nearly 5 years to materialize! There were times I had to force myself to write... although as I neared the end I became more and more inspired smile

You can do it!

Last edited by Invisible Brainiac; 06/05/17 07:28 AM.
#939731 - 10/29/17 08:53 AM Re: PostZH Legion: Mystical Mountains [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Invisible Brainiac Offline
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Wouldn't you like to know?
Feel daunted by the length of this thread? You can also check out the Recap Thread to catch up!

VOLUME 4: MOVING FORWARD

The Cordillera Mountains, Philippines, Earth

Blizzard, Brek Bannin of Tharr; cold projection
Kinetix, Zoe Saugin of Aleph; advanced telekinesis and animation of objects
Violet, Salu Digby of Imsk; shrinks and grows own body

Matter-Eater Lad, Tenzil Kem of Bismoll; consume and digest all forms of matter. Skilled chef and Legion support staff member. (Reservist)

************************************************************

Blizzard was silently thankful. The temperatures in the caves were low enough that he didn't have to worry about using his powers. That meant he could concentrate on placing his right foot just so...

"Come on, Brekky boy!" Papa Jack's loud laugh echoed through the caverns. "Papa Jack's leg is strong enough to hold you!"

Brek grit his teeth, but maintained his focus. What kind of Legionnaire would he be if he let Papa Jack distract him? That's what Wildfire had taught in Combat 101 - you distract the enemy with your quips, and don't let them get to you!

"You're sure, right?" He said as he carefully placed his foot on Papa Jack's thigh, exactly where the older man had indicated. Papa Jack grinned as he did, portly belly shaking with laughter. "I've lifted guys much taller and bigger than you, my little friend!" Before Brek could retort, Papa Jack had lifted his leg up, giving Brek the boost he needed to reach the rope hanging above. Brek used his arms to pull himself up, grunting as his weight left their guide's leg. He fumed to himself as he climbed up to where Tenzil and the girls were waiting. Kinetix was frowning; she never was very good at hiding her annoyance when she felt someone was being rude. Brek decided not to mention their guide's "little friend" crack; he would be generous and assume Papa Jack wasn't talking about his lack of height.

Besides, Tenzil had been a trooper this whole time, despite having tripped and fallen in the ice cold water they were wading through. Brek didn't want to appear whiny in front of the girls.

He drew breath as he reached the end of the rope. "Wow. That was quite a workout."

"Indeed," Violet muttered. "Not as strenuous as my usual but certainly very tiring considering we're not in a gym."

"I'm just a bit disappointed that we passed the area with all the remains," Zoe said. "I could feel the magic strongest there..."

"Not this again, Zoe," Violet chided. "We're here on vacation, not on an expedition. Besides..."

Zoe raised her hands. "I know, I know. Believe me, I've learned my lesson. I don't want to find another Star of Akkos."*

"I know you know," Violet said. "I'm also happy that there aren't any human bones that might fall on us."

"It was pretty odd, having skulls peeking out at us," Brek shivered, and not because of the cold.

"Yeah, dealing with the dark, cold wet is bad enough," Tenzil said with a laugh. "I..."

"Okay, kids!" Papa Jack's voice boomed as he climbed up the rope. "You all had a good rest?"

"Yes," Tenzil said quickly. Brek and Tenzil exchanged looks. They had both seen firsthand how snappy Zoe could get when she was annoyed. Violet already had a hand on Zoe's shoulder. "So, we go this way, Papa Jack?"

"Yes indeed!" The quartet of Legionnaires quickly fell in line, single file, as they followed Papa Jack through the caverns. The way forward was relatively flat, and Brek used the time to admire how smooth the cave walls were. Their guide happily explained how the action of water kept the cave walls so smooth.

"These caves used to be under the ocean, billions of years ago," he continued. "And that's why we have places like this!" He turned around with a grin as he swept his hand out dramatically, light-globe held high. Brek heard himself gasp as he walked forward. A large open area stretched before them, full of stalactites and rock formations from floor to ceiling. He craned his neck; he could make out the floor below. It was at least as high as the Legion's main meeting room!

"How high is.. hey!" Zoe cut off in surprise, as Papa Jack took off his flip-flops and tossed them over the edge. Her hands glowed green as she extended her telekinetic field to them. "What gives?"

Papa Jack laughed as he shook a finger at Zoe. "We're climbing down the old-fashioned way, little missy! That's why we're losing the footwear. Your toes will get a much better grip without them!"

"You've got to be kidding!" Tenzil said as looked over the edge. "We're way too high up!"

"No..." Zoe quickly crouched down and scooted over towards the edge. She carefully slipped one foot over the edge. "He's right."

"How can you tell?" Tenzil asked.

"It's your archaeological training, isn't it?" Brek quickly slipped in, heart pounding. "I mean, you went on all those digs with your mom before you got your powers..." He was rewarded with a warm smile. "Oh Brek, you remember! Yes, I know I levitate all the time, but every once in a while I go on a climb the old-fashioned way, just to keep in shape."

Brek tried to keep from grinning too much as Zoe continued down. Papa Jack laughed as he watched her go. "Well, she's a fast one!" He started over the edge. "The rest of you, watch where I put my hands, and follow!"

"I think she has the right idea," Tenzil said as he began clambering down after Zoe. "I'm getting hungry, and I don't want to eat any of the rock formations here..."

"Smart, Tenzil," Violet said. "We don't know how delicate some of these structures could be."

"Yeah. And besides, I don't really like the taste of limestone," Tenzil quipped. Brek noticed that Tenzil slyly licked his finger, though, when Violet wasn't looking. Tenzil caught his eye and put a finger to his lips, opening them in a "sssh"ing motion. Brek winked to show he understood. With a furtive glance towards Violet, Tenzil continued downwards.

Brek suppressed a shiver as he followed. He didn't really like heights, though he took comfort that he could activate his flight ring in case of an emergency. Besides, he did need to improve his physicality... You never knew when you would run into an opponent immune to your power, as Chameleon reminded regularly during their training sessions...

Brek forced himself to concentrate as he clambered down, carefully putting his hands and feet in the exact places Papa Jack was directing him. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, he made it to the bottom.

He raised his water bottle to take a sip, but yelped in surprise as Papa Jack punched him in the shoulder. "See, that wasn't so hard, little guy?" Brek made a face before downing some water. If Gates or Umbra had tagged along...

"We're not alone," Violet said. Following her gaze, Brek saw another group of younger sentients. Probably around 15 or 16 years old; old enough to be Legionnaires, but they seemed younger. Most of their peers did; Legionnaires tended to be emotionally mature for their age group. Brek was glad he wasn't wearing anything that marked him as a Legionnaire; although, they seemed so engrossed in their surroundings that he doubted any of them would have noticed their quartet. The others were just as careful; Violet had already hidden the flower on her headband, and Zoe had stopped her hair from floating, allowing gravity to make it settle on her shoulders. She still looked great, though.

Tenzil gently brushed against him, and Brek tore his eyes away from Zoe. He raised his left eyebrow in subtle thanks. He didn't want to seem like a goof for staring!

"So, we are in the zoo," Papa Jack started. "Lots of limestone formations here. This over here is the jellyfish..." Brek listened attentively as their guide pointed out various structures; some of them did look vaguely animalistic, but he had to struggle with others. When Papa Jack said one looked like a turtle, which one? Even standard Earth sea turtles were so varied, especially after Earthgov had imported some Naltorian and Aarokian species to control the invasive populations of G'ildan jellyfish that had been playing havoc with the Pacific reef systems' balance in the 26th century...

"And if you squint just right, that one looks like a... hey! Hey, missy!"

Brek turned to look at where Papa Jack was pointing. Zoe had began wondering down a side path hidden behind one of the larger structures. "Come back," Papa Jack called, waving his arms. "There are a lot of confusing paths here!"

"Zoe, what's going on?" Violet said.

"There's something here...!" Zoe called back. "I can feel it. And... Hey!" A brilliant green glow surrounded Zoe as she ran forward.

Violet quickly propelled herself into the air. "She must have seen something, if she's using her powers to light the way..." Shrinking to make herself move faster, she darted after Zoe. Tenzil and Brek looked at each other, and shrugged. They both flew as well, ignoring Papa Jack's sputtering.

"I hope she hasn't found another magical artifact..." Tenzil muttered as they darted forward.

"If she does, I'm sure she'll be more careful..." Brek returned. "At least, I hope so...Hey! There is someone there!" Brek gaped as what seemed to be a pale-skinned humanoid face emerged from the rock wall. "Is it someone phasing?"

"Hold it right there!" Zoe yelled as she extended her field towards the figure. "Stop sneaking around there!"

The figure quickly dove into the wall. Zoe cursed as she withdrew her field; her hair was floating again, as it did normally. "Damn! I don't want to clear away the wall, I don't know what's behind there."

"I'll follow," Violet's voice was grim as she began to shrink. "Activate your flight rings, everyone... oh!"

Their conversation was cut off as a brilliant white light filled the chamber. Brek grunted, despite himself. He could hear the other tourists screaming, more in surprise and fear than in pain. Instinctively, he threw up an ice shield to protect himself; then cursed himself for this move. If his shield shattered...

It didn't matter, though. The light became brighter and brighter, and he felt the world explode.


***********************************************************************************************************

IB's notes:

1) The Star of Akkos was the artifact that caused Kinetix to lose her powers in LSH v4 Annual 6.

#939966 - 11/03/17 06:43 AM Re: PostZH Legion: Mystical Mountains [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Omni Offline
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Omni  Offline
Active

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Boston
a white exploding light can mean many things....here's hoping its nothing to do with Zoe losing her powers. we just got her back. but you've thrown in her lust for power a bit...so i'm a little scared tbh.

This mini team continues to work well and i like how Berk is just so enamored with Zoe and its cute.

Papa Jack may end up getting a wallop from Zoe if he's not careful.

Hmmm who is this mysterious phantom i need to know!!!!

Good characterization of all. i like that Vi stands up to Zoe now and tries to keep her in check but i could see that going south if she harps on Zoe too much.

Can't wait for more.


read the adventures of the Reboot Legion!

http://www.legionworld.net/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=2;t=001232
#940019 - 11/05/17 02:56 AM Re: PostZH Legion: Mystical Mountains [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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I thought I commented on this a while ago, sorry IB! I have been enjoying Zoe and pals' time off and I agree with Omni that it's cute seeing how Brek is so enamored of her...looking forward to seeing where this bright light is going now though!


Read the alternate adventures of the Legion after Legion of Three Worlds!
postlo3w
#940037 - 11/05/17 07:07 AM Re: PostZH Legion: Mystical Mountains [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
Joined: Oct 2003
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Invisible Brainiac Offline
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Invisible Brainiac  Offline
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 58,440
Wouldn't you like to know?
Thank you guys! especially glad you like Brekís little crush!

Omni, glad you like this quartet. They have amazing chemistry I agree. Vi has been able to chide Zoe for a while (memorably in L*37 and even as far back as LSH Annual 6), but I agree they are more equal now. and yes, a delicate balance indeed as Zoe wonít take things lying down if Vi does go too far

Papa Jack, is, sadly, like quite a few guys I know, some from back home. he means well but he just has trouble figuring out boundaries

Donít worry, I love Zoe too much to have anything bad happen to her without better set up and higher stakes, especially after all the trouble I took to bring her back lol! but white lights arenít always good...

more to come soon I hope!

#942497 - 01/03/18 08:05 PM Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 58,440
Invisible Brainiac Offline
Unseen, not unheard
Invisible Brainiac  Offline
Unseen, not unheard

Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 58,440
Wouldn't you like to know?
Feel daunted by the length of this thread? You can also check out the Recap Thread to catch up!

VOLUME 4: MOVING FORWARD

The Cordillera Mountains, Philippines, Earth

Blizzard, Brek Bannin of Tharr; cold projection
Kinetix, Zoe Saugin of Aleph; advanced telekinesis and animation of objects
Violet, Salu Digby of Imsk; shrinks and grows own body

Matter-Eater Lad, Tenzil Kem of Bismoll; consume and digest all forms of matter. Skilled chef and Legion support staff member. (Reservist)

************************************************************

Kinetix glowed brighter than the green star Floran as she used her telekinesis to clear dust and debris from her field of vision. "You're not getting away, you thief!" She snarled as she searched for the figure she had seen earlier. It was obvious that there had been an artifact of great magical power embedded in the walls of the cave, and it seemed evident that the thief's attempted retrieval of that object had unleashed a burst of magical energy. She wouldn't let anyone desecrate this beautiful place!

She paid no heed to the bits of limestone rained down on her, bouncing harmlessly off the shield she had woven without thinking. She kept looking for the humanoid form she had seen clothed in dark brown, paying no attention to even the buzzing in her ears...

She almost jerked back as violet filled her vision. "Zoe! If I had yelled any louder I could have damaged your eardrums," Violet snapped as she grew to normal size in front of Zoe. "What are you doing?"

"I need to catch the thief, Vi!" Zoe waved away another batch of debris with her hand. "Whoever we saw stole a powerful artifact..."

"Never mind that," Vi shook her head. "I think the thief vanished. I was close to whomever it was when I shrank, but after the white light I couldn't see the figure anymore. RIght now, though, we need to make sure everyone's okay."

"You and the boys can handle it," Zoe retorted. "I can try to sense the magic and..."

"Zoe, listen to yourself!" Vi raised her voice ever so slightly; for her, that was akin to screaming. "Are you trying to say that this magical object is more important than the lives of the tourists trapped in this cave?"

Zoe faltered. Memories of the time Violet had dragged her out of the ruins they had found the Star of Akkos in flashed through her mind.* So did memories of her dream not more than an hour before that had happened - of searching for power, so she could use it to help others. She shuddered involuntarily. Helping others made her feel good, but so did wielding power... but she had resolved never to let her love for power overcome her duty to others. "I... grife, Vi. No, no, I'm not. I'm sorry, I got carried away. You're right. We save the people first, and try to track the thief after."

Violet nodded. "Good. You go on back and make sure everyone's safe. I'll..."

"Get out of the cave and call for help," Zoe finished. "See you in a bit."

Before Violet finished shrinking again, Zoe had already turned back into the corridor from where she had come. Groans and cries filled the cave. Brek was moaning as he lay on the floor. "Are you okay?" she asked with concern. He waved her off. "Fine... managed to turn my ice wall into a flurry of snow when everything blew up, but not in time to stop some of it from smashing into my ribs..." He winced. "Wish I had thought of it a bit earlier... Usually better at judging the consistency of ice needed to withstand a blast..."

"Magic can be unpredictable," Zoe muttered. "You stay here, and I'll gather everyone and bring them here."

"Way ahead of you." Tenzil was floating towards them, helping an injured man along. The man was groaning while holding his leg; his dark skin and features marked him as a local. About a dozen frightened sentients followed behind, each as diverse as the Legion's own membership. "Mister Cruz here is one of the other guides. Besides us and Papa Jack, says there were a total of three guides and thirty-two tourists in the chamber."

"Any other groups before or after us?" Zoe asked. Having booked the tour, she knew that all groups started at about roughly the same time in the morning or in the afternoon, but groups could start from either end of the cave connections. Tenzil shook his head. "None from the end we started at; there were two groups starting from the opposite end, but they would still be half an hour away from this chamber."

"Good job, Tenz. Violet's heading out, so she can check on them. We should prioritize the sentients here, with us." After ushering the tourists to a spot near Brek and checking if anyone knew where the others were, Zoe and Tenzil started off in opposite directions.

Moving quickly, Tenzil had already found and sent a handful of tourists back to where Brek and the others were gathered when he heard a shrill whistle. "What have we here?" Tenzil followed its sound. He bent down beside the remains of what had been rather long stalactites. The sound was coming from here. "Oh, thank grife! Please, please get us out!" Tenzil shone a light near the hole, careful not to have the beam blind anyone under. "Are you injured? Can you move all your limbs?" After the trapped tourists replied in the affirmative, Tenzil stepped back and studied the pile quickly. "Okay, it shouldn't take long to eat a way for you out of here. Just relax, and I'll have you out in a bit."

Over on the other side of the cavern, Zoe had already rescued a few more tourists, using her telekinesis to gently get them back on their feet. She flew along through the pathway, carefully checking under any piles of debris to make sure no sentients were buried, unconscious, under any rubble. She flew around a curve in the path and stopped.

Papa Jack was kneeling, his back to her, while chanting something under his breath.

"What's going on?" She said quietly as she flew beside him. "We should get out of here."

Papa Jack flashed her a sharp glance, one which made Zoe start simply because it was so at odds with the jolly and somewhat buffoonish man who had guided them down here. He shook his head and continued chanting. Zoe hesitated; she had been around magic users long enough to see that Papa Jack was probably doing something. Maybe keeping a spell going? She turned to face the wall he was facing, and tried to see if she could sense anything. She wished she still had her sensitivity to magic,** but Mysa had told her it was gone. She was no more sensitive to magical objects or energy than the typical sentient. But she could still tell if anything was in that wall - or had been. She concentrated, and sensed a small spherical hole - possibly where something had once been. And there was... something more...

"Oh!" she gasped as images flooded her mind. Sacred burial caves. Drawing on the energies of the dead. An artifact in the shape of a crescent moon. Sealed in the wall. Using the energies to keep the community above the caves flourishing. Keeping the caves intact. Imbuing selected members of the community with minor magical abilities for protection - covert, defensive. Hiding themselves in plain sight. Keeping the mountains whole.

Whole.

"Oh no," she whispered. She shook her head to clear it of the images; they must have been revealed to her by the residual magic in the place. Someone must have stolen that artifact - perhaps for power, perhaps for riches. But that wasn't important now. She swiftly knelt beside Papa Jack. "You can't keep this cavern from collapsing in on itself alone!"

Sweat beaded on Papa Jack's forehead as he ignored her, all the while chanting. Zoe bit her lip as she considered; the images she had seen clearly showed that the artifact was what kept this particular cavern from standing. Its removal had caused the explosion, and the loss of the artifact explained why debris continued to rain down even after the explosion. But could Papa Jack hold it up? Her own powers could supplement his efforts in a particular area, but she could hardly substitute for the magic that protected an entire cavern. She hated to admit it, but she simply was not pwoerful enough.

She glanced once more at the determination on Papa Jack's face. Then she brought her flight ring up to her lips. "Tenzil, we have to gather everyone together, now. Please give me a count of how many we have already. Brek, I think you should form an ice shield around you just in case. Make it nice and thick above - there's a chance the cavern will come crumbling down on all of us. I can help you reinforce it later." Barely waiting for her two teammates to respond, and for Tenzil to say they had the two other guides and twenty-two of the thirty-two tourists, she knelt down beside Papa Jack. "I'll be back." She gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder, then dashed off, conscious of the bits of rock that kept raining down from the cave ceiling.

In minutes, she found a group of six tourists - two injured enough that she had to telekinetically carry them back to where Brek was. Tenzil met her, leading the remaining four. "What's going on, Zoe?" he asked as he gently laid one tourist down on the ground.

"I'll explain later," she said quickly. "Keep everyone together here. I'm fetching Papa Jack. And be ready, because the ceiling MAY come down."

She darted off amidst gasps from the tourists. She knew Tenzil would soothe everyone with his humor while Brek would keep working on his ice dome. Coming to a stop beside Papa Jack, she knelt beside him. "You can't keep this up forever. Everyone in the cavern is safe. We have to go now!"

He shook his head as he kept chanting.

"Papa Jack, listen to me!"

He ignored her.

"I know how important this place must be to you. But we can restore it after. Believe me, you shouldn't risk your life if it won't do any good. The artifact your people prize is gone - it must be. And you can only sustain its magical effects for so long."

She could see tears begin to form in his eyes, and she felt all the worse for being so annoyed with him earlier. "I should know about being stubborn. But a tactical retreat will enable you to fight another day. There is no point in losing your life over this." She paused, then knelt in front of him, staring into his eyes. "Please."

Tears began streaming down his face. Then he stopped.

She smiled at him as she pulled him up. "You did keep the cavern whole long enough for us to find everybody."

He shook his head. "I wasn't even thinking. This place is sacred to us, and..."

His words were drowned out as a loud crack sounded above them. Without looking, Zoe extended her telekinetic field around Papa Jack, grabbed his shoulders, and flew forward just seconds before a large piece of rock crashed into where they had been standing.

"Zoe...!" Tenzil's worried voice sounded over the flight ring array.

"Coming, Tenz! Just hang on...!"

She flew into Brek's ice dome and set Papa Jack down, then extended her field around the inner surface of the dome. Brek quickly sealed off the entrance she had flown through, and Zoe extended her field around that area as well. They could hear the cracking of ice as rock hit on from the outside.

Tenzil looked at her. "Now what do we do?"

She sat down with a sigh. "Now we wait. I'm sure Violet will be back with help soon."

Brek grunted. Zoe looked down to see he had a small cube of ice where his ribs were. "It's a good thing nobdoy here has any life-threatening injuries."

Zoe nodded as she took his other hand in hers. "And I'm also glad this is towards the end of our trip." She sighed as she checked the time on her Omnicom. "I wonder if we can still get that buffet dinner later."

Tenzil surreptitiously dabbed at his mouth, then settled back, hands on the floor. "Might as well try to make ourselves comfortable." He looked over to where a young sentient was sobbing. "Hey, kid, don't worry. That ice dome and that telekinetic shield is stronger than you think it is. Why, these two once withstood a mystical explosion that leveled a mountain..." As Tenzil continued with his story, the child slowly stopped crying and began to sit up and take interest. So did the other tourists. Soon, everyone except Papa Jack was listening keenly.

Zoe placed a comforting hand on Papa Jack's shoulder. He just stared straight ahead, silently. Brek gripped Zoe's hand tightly as they exchanged glances.

"We're going to catch whoever stole the magic in this place," she said quietly. She knew she was saying it as much for her own benefit as for Papa Jack's.

****************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************

IB's notes:

1) LSH v4 Annual 6, when the Star of Akkos robbed Zoe of her powers

2) Legionnaires 42; an unborn Zoe was caught in the energy from the Scepter of Sybolla, which her mother Azra had given to an injured Mysa to heal herself. Zoe's genetic structure was affected, allowing her to absorb an energy pool on Titan which gave her her telekinetic powers. She has since lost that ability after relinquishing all the magic she absorbed in order to restore this universe (see Volume 2 of this fic).

Last edited by Invisible Brainiac; 01/15/18 05:14 AM.
#942580 - 01/06/18 07:37 AM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Harbinger Offline
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here, more often than not
Hey IB, this is really good.

I really like your team of Tenz, Vi, Zoe and Brek - none of whom would usually interest me all that much but you've crafted this really sweet story with unrequited love, a mystery, action and a stunning (real life) panorama of sites for the team to explore - it's very engaging and draws in the reader without the need for raging space battles with all the blitzkrieg they entail. It's also really noticeable that you've left the larger team behind and are purely focussing on this rather low-key adventure - as we are here because of our love of the large team this is quite brave but pays dividends as we follow your small team into the caves - Well done!

Zoe's lust for power is almost a trope in itself but you give a very kind spin to it by emphasising that she wants it to be able to do more good.

I like how practical and pragmatic you have shown Vi to be without making her into a Rambo-esque cypher *Cough* Levitz!*cough* she seems really sweet and genuine in your story, if she'd been more like this in canon I may have liked her a bit more.

I've always had problems with Brek, and if fact couldn't wait to write him out from my own fic, but here he reads to be as a bit naÔve but good hearted, dealing with things in a puppy dog manner without it being saccharine - that's a good tightrope to walk if done well, and you have.

Tenzil is such a fun character it's impossible not to have him goof around and you've caught that aspect, though if I'm honest I kind of expect more showing off and joking around from him - I guess he's on his best behaviour smile

The Bgtzler thief stealing all these mystic artefacts is a good plot - I love a good mystery and you've certain provided us with that.

Looking forward to seeing where you take it from here IB, will Zoe get her hands on the thief (and the mystical objects) o will this feed into a larger storyline?

More, more, more!


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#942593 - 01/06/18 09:33 AM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Thanks Harbi, glad you are liking it! I was tempted to give this story a much bigger bang, but finally decided it would work better as a more low-key one. Happy it works!

Zoe's power lust has evolved, thank goodness - after all she's been through, she would have to be pretty dense to not have learned anything.

This Violet certainly has a better head on her shoulders than always-angry Levitz Vi! I also grew tired of that version fast!

I liked Brek best when he was well-meaning, if a bit too optimistic smile

Tenzil has always been a bit more low-key in the Reboot than his TMK-era counterpart was. I WAS wondering if I could sneak in some more wisecracks last installment, but I had a hard time thinking of some given the situation smile

It certainly looks like a Bgztler is behind this... wink A clue, this isn't the first artifact that has mysteriously and suddenly disappeared... wink

#942620 - 01/07/18 04:00 AM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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I like the low-key too. There's still plenty of tension as the cave collapses and we learn what Papa Jack is trying to do. They're all heroes, but I can almost see the determination on Zoe's face as she vows to protect/restore the magic of the site.

Papa Jack started out as a bit of a buffoon, but has certainly shown that he's got some deep layers. I hope he stays as part of the story and search for the thief.


Holy Cats of Egypt!
#942644 - 01/07/18 03:04 PM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Thanks for the comments, FC!

Zoe really is a determined person, and sometimes she needs to think twice before committing to an action!

Papa Jack reminds me of someone I used to work with; he would also be goofy and make outlandish statements for attention, because he thought it was funny. But he was very capable at his job.

#942687 - 01/08/18 10:12 AM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Ib, another good installment and sets up a mystery for this quartet to keep looking into.
The part with Vi and Zoe was really well done. it show cased their friendship in such a great way. i love how Vi is the voice of reason and can talk Zoe down. i agree that she's come along way from her over zealous power hunger.

Zoe walks that fine line of power and corruption as she knows just how bad it can get for her to do so even if her intentions are good. But something tells me we could still see a "Dark Kinetix" sort of storyline coming.

I'm glad that white light was just a burst from the magical energy but its sad to see these caves getting destroyed.

Looking forward to see where this goes.


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#942704 - 01/09/18 04:49 AM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Thanks, Omni!

You're right, Zoe is better able to resist temptation now, but she is still susceptible to it smile

I've been to the actual caves, and it is a bit sad. But it's nothing the Legionnaires can't eventually fix smile

#942955 - 01/15/18 11:24 AM Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Feel daunted by the length of this thread? You can also check out the Recap Thread to catch up!

VOLUME 4: MOVING FORWARD

The Cordillera Mountains, Philippines, Earth

Blizzard, Brek Bannin of Tharr; cold projection
Chameleon, Reep Daggle of Durla; shapeshifting
Element Lass, Candi "Princess" Pyponte-LeParc III; transmutation
Kinetix, Zoe Saugin of Aleph; advanced telekinesis and animation of objects
Violet, Salu Digby of Imsk; shrinks and grows own body

Chemical Kid, Condo Arlik of Phlon; controls chemical reactions (probationary pending completion of Legion basic training)
Inferno, Dirk Morgna of Earth (USA and Russia); pyrokinesis (probationary pending completion of Legion basic training)

Impulse, Kent Shakespeare of Earth (United Kingdom: England); enhanced speed, strength, durability and recuperative abilities; medical doctor and Legion support staff member
Matter-Eater Lad, Tenzil Kem of Bismoll; consume and digest all forms of matter. Skilled chef and Legion support staff member. (Reservist)

Amp, Ming Sul of Earth (Korea); amplifies the natural abilities of self and others (Reservist and Cadet)
Calorie Queen, Taryn Loy of Bismoll; consume and digest all forms of matter, conversion of digested matter into super-strength (Reservist and Cadet)
Lamprey, Tayla Skott of Earth (Maldives and Palau); underwater survival; hydrokinesis (Reservist and Cadet)
Tomb, unpronounceable of Sarccus; controls others' bodily functions (Reservist and Cadet)
Vapor, Tal Nahii of Lallor (Hero of Lallor seconded for training); transforms her body into gases (Reservist)
Veilmist of Khundia; teleportation (Reservist and Cadet)

************************************************************

Blizzard stirred, in that manner in which one does when it is about time to wake up. His mind was beginning to fight with itself, as conscious thoughts were beginning to form. He struggled against it; he wanted to rest some more. But there was some outside stimulus, that felt like a loud rumbling... deep, booming... How could that be? If he were in his room on Legion World, it would be full of the ambient sounds of winter - a gentle breeze, the calmness of a light snowfall.

But wait... he was beginning to remember. He was on vacation. Where had they gone? Temples, a cave... A cave!

He jerked up with a start, and came face to face with Element Lass. Behind her, a glowing Inferno waved; he was generating enough flame to light up the cavern.

"Well, it's about time, sleeping beauty!" Her worried smile belied her teasing words. "We were beginning to think you were out of it! Now just you relax, I've transmuted most of the debris to oxygen, and we have a nice pallet here for you..."

"Where's Zoe?" Brek blurted out. Then, as if realizing what he had said, he quickly stammered. "And Tenzil, and the tourists...?"

"Everybody's fine," Candi laughed soothingly as she gently patted him on the shoulder. Her touch was surprisingly light. "Now, you sit back down and rest. Creating that ice dome must have tired you out."

Brek leaned back with a sigh. In seconds, he was asleep again.

The rest of the Legionnaires, Active and Reservist, worked efficiently. Violet was taking charge, giving orders with a calm and quiet confidence. She noted, with some approval, that most of the Cadets were being very professional; many of those here would certainly get her nomination come the tryouts the team was planning. But it was expected; nearly everyone here had volunteered, and it was usually the most serious, dedicated Cadets who volunteered for these routine missions.

This one was seemingly routine, anyway. But a quick glance over to where Kinetix and Chameleon, with Papa Jack in tow, were rummaging around some rubble told Violet all she needed to know about that.

She put that out of her mind now, and concentrated on making sure things were going smoothly. "Good job, you two," she told Amp and Lamprey. The former's hands glowed with her tell-tale red signature as she boosted Lamprey's powers to control water. The result was that stray puddles around the chamber were being collected into a pool off to the side. Violet quietly noted the intensity with which the two were working; they both acknowledged her encouragement cordially, but they kept the banter to a minimum. It was obvious that these two were among the ones who wanted to be Legionnaires the most. In fact, they had volunteered for almost every single mission opened to the Cadets. Word around the cafeteria was that most active Legionnaires were heavily considering voting for them when the time came.

Violet made up her mind to observe them carefully. Lamprey seemed like she would work well with anyone, but lately Amp had been a little too tense... And she seemed to have a chip on her shoulder around some of the newer Actives, like Mentalla, Chemical Kid and Inferno...

************************************************************

In the middle of the cavern, Impulse was seeing to all the injuries. Under his direction, Vapor turned herself into an anesthetic gas to allow one sentient with a broken leg to sleep. She quickly move on to the next patient, a young girl who was shivering. "Easy there, honey," she cooed softly. "I'm turning into fueramium gas; it will just warm you up a little bit." Impulse smiled approvingly at her as he continued setting his patient's leg. Beside him, the silent Tomb waved his hands over a young boy who was crying. Kent made sounds of reassurance. "Tomb won't hurt you," he whispered. "See, your arm is hurt and bleeding. Tomb will make it feel better. Can you be brave for me?" The child bit his lip and nodded. Tomb waved his hands again, and the flow of blood from the boy's arm trickled off, leaving only a small smudge. The child stopped crying and looked at Tomb in wonder; the quiet Cadet gave a small smile back. Kent took careful note; they had been working with Tomb to be more welcoming, and he did make an effort when dealing with the public. He was making some progress, but he lacked the natural flair that Chameleon or Microbe had in acting as ambassadors for their species.

On Kent's other side, Chemical Kid assisted Kent by stailizing the metabolisms of some of the more badly-injured patients, or those who had to be kept sedated. "You've been making a lot of progress in your studies of biology," Kent complimented. Condo grinned back. "I have a good tutor... well, two good tutors. Both you and Lyle have been teaching me so much." He heaved a little sigh. "You're a lot nicer about it than he is, of course," he laughed.

"Oh, am I?" Kent cocked an eyebrow. "Sure," Condo said. "I think most of the team knows that. You know how Lyle is when he feels you're being a little bit too slow. Not that he appreciates being reminded that he can be a little high-and-mighty sometimes..."

"Do tell," Kent said quietly, as he looked down at Condo's firm, strong arms hovering above his next patient. Condo's powers worked their effect, slowing down the patient's metabolism of sugar. He was unconscious and could not eat, so his body's energy needed to be conserved. Kent started to say something, then stopped. It wouldn't be right to comment on how reckless Lyle had been when they had retaken Legion World, that he had taken some chances - justified, of course - with the other hostages besides Condo. And what good would it do?Nothing; Lyle had been cleared as following the Legion playbook during the team post-mortem. Kent gazed again at Condo; he really liked how his relatively dark complexion looked against his dark green costume. Impulse very consciously kept from licking his lips as he allowed himself to admit the possibility that he was very, very jealous of Lyle Norg for landing such a fine specimen of masculinity.


************************************************************

Over to the side, Tenzil and Calorie Queen were eating through rubble to make beams. They very carefully applied just the right amount of saliva to keep the ends smooth. As they finished, Tenzil watched in approval as Calorie Queen carefully took a beam. Consulting his Omnicom, he directed her. "Just slant it five degrees, and... there!" He wiped his forehead as she took the next beam. "Well, I sure am glad you're a living furnace..."

"Luck of the draw, I guess," she laughed. "A happy accident at my mother's lab."

"I assume she couldn't replicate it, or else we would have our own little Legion on Bismoll."

"There was certainly no ethical way to try to recreate it on Bismollians," she said matter-of-factly. She fell silent for a moment, then spoke up quickly. There was no hesitation it her voice, but she blurted out her words as if she had rehearsed them for ages before finally being able to say them. "Say... I was wondering if I could buy you a drink. You've spent so much time with the Legion, and maybe you could give a fellow Bismollian some tips."

"Sure thing," Tenzil laughed. "Why, I already told the team I have no plans of returning to active duty, and your extra abilities would make you a far better Active Legionnaire than I would!"

"Oh!" Taryn froze as she was lifting the next beam. "You did that, for me?"

Tenzil shrugged. "You've been working hard, and you're far more competent than like 90% of our race. You definitely deserve to be seriously considered for a full-time slot on the Mission Monitor Board."

Calorie Queen spent the next thirty seconds effusively thanking Tenzil as he smiled.


************************************************************

Towards the end of the cavern, Element Lass and Inferno were working together to clear the path to the surfance. The explosion had destroyed many of the passages leading to the cavern. Candi was now transmuting many of the larger pieces of rubble into oxygen. Dirk held his arm up, giving her light so she could work. He frowned.

"Are you okay, dear?" Candi arched an eyebrow in concern. "You don't seem too happy."

He inhaled. "No... it's just that I don't feel very useful here. And I feel like... well..."

"Like you have something to prove?"

Dirk's lips clamped into a tight line.

"You can tell me, dear," Candi said gently. "I know you don't like being on probationary status, but this is only because being a Legionnaire is difficult. You need to be trained for it. But it doesn't mean we think you don't have what it takes to be a Legionnaire."

"But a lot of you gained active membership right away," Dirk pointed out a little irritably. "I've been studying the archives."

"I understand the team tightened the rules after we were lost in the Kwai Galaxy," Candi explained gently. "The threats being faced were tougher, and there was a need to be more careful. But when we voted, we all knew that you would pass with flying colors."

Dirk's tongue clicked. "I know, I know... I know it will only be a couple more weeks. I just can't help but feel frustrated, because I'm taking the same classes as the Cadets..."

"There will always be people who seem to take things too seriously," Candi laughed. "Why, when Karate Kid was new, he read every single line of the Legion constitution... Kid Quantum did too, you know. She had such a chip on her shoulder!"

Dirk smiled. "She certainly seems more relaxed now, I..."

They were interrupted as a pinkish figure flashed into view - Veilmist. She cast her eyes around her, and smiled when she saw Dirk. She moved closer to him, wiggling her hips just so. "My, isn't this mission so boring? What say you and I go and... explore."

"We're needed here, Veilmist," Dirk said quietly.

"Mmmm, but just for a little while..."

"I think, dear," Candi cut in, "that you should go see Impulse and ask if any more of his patients are ready to be brought to the surface."

"I think you should," Dirk said calmly.

Veilmist fixed him a stare, then tossed her head back with a sniff. She vanished in a pink glow.

Dirk turned to look at Candi. "I guess some people need to be more serious," he laughed.

Candi chuckled. "As long as she does as she is told, I guess I can't complain. Not everyone in the Cadet program wants to be a Legionnaire - nor should be one."

Dirk nodded in acquiescence.

************************************************************

In the passageway leading out of the cavern, Chameleon crouched beside an almost perfectly round hole. Kinetix shuddered as he turned towards her. "Er, pardon me, Cham. That just looks a little creepy." He cocked his head to the side, then laughed. "Oh, I'm sorry. It's just that the form of the Kathooni Thousand-eyes is useful for spotting things in the dark. Zoe made a face as the multiple small, beady eyes Cham had sprouted blinked in unison. "Well, have you found anything?"

Cham shook his head. "Nothing physical. But I'd like to run some scans. There may be a signature we can trace." He took out his Omnicom and held it over the hole. "Now, you say you saw a figure that seemed to phase through the wall."

Zoe nodded. "I'm pretty sure it was humanoid, but that's all I can swear to."

"Then..." Chameleon made some adjustments to his Omnicom. "Let's see what we can find..."

"Find our treasure," Papa Jack said grumpily.

Zoe put a soothing hand on his shoulder. "We will do our best, you know that."

Papa Jack remained silent, sullen face staring longingly at the former receptacle of their treasure. Zoe hesitated. This man was so different now, his obnoxiousness gone. Perhaps it had been an act for the tourists. She felt a sudden, complete sense of sympathy for him. "Maybe you can tell us more about the artifact that was stolen?"

Papa Jack turned and fixed his eyes on her. "Promise me you won't broadcast it. We hid it for a reason - we did not want to be exploited! A millenium ago, my country was colonized by those who treated us as lesser people, just because of the color of our skin. My people were among those who resisted, because we were up here in the mountains. And we hid that artifact so it could not be used by those who wanted to profit from us!"

Zoe wanted to argue, that the United Planets was different from the colonists of old. But one look at Papa Jack's face told her it would do no good. "You have my word," she said quietly.

Papa Jack breathed deeply, then began to speak in the manner of one used to telling stories. "The White Stone of the Adranika holds the essence of the ancient Adranika race. When swallowed by one pure of heart, she gains the abilities of enhanced strength and speed, flight, invulnerability, and a limited form of telepathy. In fact, she transforms into the magical Darna. But, the stone can only be used by one pure of heart, one who is selfless, who knows nothing of hatred or vengeance. It is very powerful; so powerful that attempts to use it wrongly are disastrous."

"What do you mean, attempts to use it wrongly?" Zoe furrowed her brow. "I thought it could only be ones by those who are pure?"

"It only grants powers directly to those who are pure," Papa Jack nodded in clarification. "But, over a millenium ago, during the Spanish-American War, Spanish soldiers and American soldiers had heard of the stone. They were both competing to get it. A squad of Spanish soldiers finally found it, and many of our people fell to try and stop them. They were unsuccessful, and the stone was taken."

"I..." Zoe wanted to ask why the stone wasn't used, but fell silent. The poor man was so troubled by the stone's disappearance, it didn't seem right. But Papa Jack met her eyes. "I know what you want to ask. Nobody in our village could use the stone because... we were all too vengeful. We were too angry at our treatment before and during the war. The Spanish had exploited us for centuries, while the Americans lied about helping us win our independence. We ended up trading one colonial power for another because we trusted them at the start of the war!"

Zoe kept silent, though she mad a mental note to look up the history later on. "And the Spanish tried to use the stone?"

"Yes. None of them could use it, so they tried to force it to give up its power. They conducted some experiments on it... and they caused an explosion that wiped out their camp." He shook his head. "History is quiet about it, because they didn't want to admit they lost the war because of that. But that's what must have happened."

"And I guess after their camp blew up, you were able to get the stone back..."

"Yes, we recovered it before the Americans could. And because we could not use it, we kept it here." Papa Jack sighed as he looked again, longingly, at the wall. "But the stone had a natural affinity for this sacred place, and... we think it tried to protect itself, by helping form the cave system."

"That is probably what did happen," Zoe said quietly. "It knew it would be away from bad hands here."

Papa Jack nodded. "That is why we must find it."

"We will do our best," Zoe replied. She looked him in the eyes.

He looked back. Then without a word, he turned and walked away.

Chameleon straightened up from his kneeling position, and stood beside Zoe. "A magical artifact goes missing. Sound familiar?"

Zoe whirled on him. "You can't mean Mordru..!"

"Thankfully, no." Reep held up his Omnicom. "Already asked Gear to check. But I do recall him gathering various magical artifacts when he woke again.*"

"So you think this was stolen by someone who wanted magical power?"

"It's one possibility," Reep acknowledged. "I've already asked Mysa to come take a look, and I've had Lyle quietly check on Dragonmage..."

"You've thought of everything, haven't you? I'm impressed - just like a detective on Crime Scene Investigation: Ventura."

"As long as it's not the Rimbor series," Reep laughed. "I hate the lead actor there." His tone hardened as he rubbed his chin. "We can't afford to jump to conclusions, though." He held up his Omnicom. "It is not commonly known, but Bgztlians leave a faint energy signature shortly after they phase. It doesn't last long, but Bgztl has taught the Science Police and us the methods for detecting it. It was used when we caught the famous Phantom Lad thief a while back."

"And I take it you have just tested for that?"

"I have, and I've asked both Tinya and Lyle to look at the results." Cham met Zoe's eyes. "Whoever was phasing, wasn't a Bgztlian."

Zoe considered. "Any other suspects, then?"

"On an off-chance I checked Radion - he can phase. But he's definitely on Xanthu." Cham's voice dropped. "But there is one another phaser that we know off. A Sklarian named Kono."

Zoe's breath caught in her throat. "That's the thief who was stealing ancient artifacts for Viktor Rhysson, right?**"

"The very same one."

"And if she stole this because it was magical, not because it was valuable... Mordru destroyed Sklar. Could it be some twisted revenge plot?"

"The Sklarians have never quite forgiven the United Planets for not doing more to help them resettle," Cham said quietly. "And we have heard rumblings from within the Affiliated Planets too. I think this bears looking into."

"And there's a possibility something was stolen in Cambodia, too..." Despite her transuit and her telekinetic field keeping her warm, Zoe shivered. The team had nearly been wiped out against Mordru. If the Sklarians should try to waken him...

She suddenly felt very, very cold.

***********************************************************************************************************************

IB's notes:

1) Mordru was revived in Legionnaires 44. He collected mystical artifacts and absorbed power from beings such as his grandson, a powerful magician in his own right (Legionnaires 45-50).

2) Kono was hired by rich businessman Viktor Rhysson to steal various treasures, such as the Mona Lisa, some crystals from the Crystal Caverns on Earth, and a batarang.

Last edited by Invisible Brainiac; 01/16/18 12:55 AM.
#943121 - 01/17/18 04:09 PM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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I am glad to see Calorie Queen getting some love, she is one of my favourite obscure Legion characters smile

And nice to see that the never-ending CSI franchise will continue on long after television has become an obselete technology hahaha laugh


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#943167 - 01/18/18 05:52 PM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Wouldn't you like to know?
I love Cal as well,I always had a soft spot for her as the "super" Bismollian. I can imagine how frustrated she must have been, being barred from being a Legionnaire despite having more impressive abilities than Tenzil did.

Well, you know how we humans are. Some things are just meant to keep running for a long time wink

#944151 - 02/09/18 08:11 PM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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This could be huge! Mordru awakened because of revenge? i'm on board. i hope the team can find Kono.

agreed the CSI franchises liked got me laughing.

It was nice to see the rest of the team coming in and helping resettle the caverns and tend to the wounded.

The history lesson from Papa Jack was really good and thank for the link on the stone. Its interesting that the item Kono stole has a negative affect on those who seek vengeance.. i wonder if she has the Black stone from the link or will go after it to take on Mordru?


read the adventures of the Reboot Legion!

http://www.legionworld.net/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=2;t=001232
#944153 - 02/09/18 08:24 PM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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This could be huge! Mordru awakened because of revenge? i'm on board. i hope the team can find Kono.

agreed the CSI franchises liked got me laughing.

It was nice to see the rest of the team coming in and helping resettle the caverns and tend to the wounded.

The history lesson from Papa Jack was really good and thank for the link on the stone. Its interesting that the item Kono stole has a negative affect on those who seek vengeance.. i wonder if she has the Black stone from the link or will go after it to take on Mordru?

Papa Jack mentioned an explosion and then retrieval of the stone.. i wonder if any information was lost in the intervening millennium that might have more clues about the explosion. In the link it talks about Darna and Darna sounds a bit like Zoe... minus having to forgo the love part. Zoe and Berk just got to flirting. i hope she doesn't have to give that up.

I liked the moment with Candi and Dirk and we never got to see them together before and she still gives great advice. Dirk can get through it. But i understand he has been waiting for this for a long time.
Is your Vielmist from Khuadia?

can't wait for more!


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#944183 - 02/10/18 06:54 AM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Thanks, Omni! Kono certainly has a good reason to want to get back at Mordru... and she wonít be easy to find!

There may be ways to manipulate that magical stone smile Interesting that you saw some parallels between Darna and Zoe!

Candi is such a dear, and in many ways is quite wise.

Veilmist here is half-Khundian, which is why the Khunds havenít tried to ďrepossessĒ her yet. Also explains why she is less warlike and why her physique is different. Amilia Crugg, our other female Khund, has a very different look and attitude so I made Veilmist half-Khundian only to account for the differences

#944346 - 02/13/18 01:09 PM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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That was a really nice collection of vignettes within the bigger rescue story IB, some very sweet character moments and great observations.

So am I right in thinking Brek has a blizzard playing as ambient background noise in his apartment? Whatever floats your boat, I guess, though personally I'd go for the sound of waves lapping a warm shoreline.

You take on Candi is really sweet and kind, though I'm having trouble picturing her as anything other than the Monstress so could you put a reminder of how she appears now please - I did scan back a bit ut didn't fing the poat where she returned. It was well written how she caught and reacted to Brek calling out for Zoe, bless him.

Lamprey and Amp being keen and professional was good to see, you've taken those two on an interesting character arc and well done for reminding us that Ming is a little miffed she didn't make it to the main team at the last try out too, hopefully she'll get over that soon.

Characters that change into gasses always confuse me, as I wonder if the anaesthetic gas breathed in by the injured would mean there would be less of Vapor to reform when she resumed her human form? Still, nice scene with her helping Dr Shakespeare. I've no idea who Tomb is - sorry I really don't know much about the reboot characters - but it's a neat ability, and him not being a natural ambassador is a good take on having an alien on the team (I assume he's an alien?).

As Dr Shakespeare appears to be gay in all the fan fics that are being written her can we safely assume that when/if he appears in a comic there'll have been enough fans that will have read our work that DC will have no choice but to have it as canon? The Legion has always been defined and refined by the fans so I think so smile

Possibly my favourite scene was Tenzil and Calorie Queen's as it really highlighted Tenzil's decency and her keenness. And she'd be a really interesting character to work with so well done for bringing her back. I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with her story.

Candi and Dirks scene was really good too - discussing which Legionnaire was the most focussed and how they've mellowed was a nice way of Candi to encourage Dirk without just telling himto calm down. Veilmist is shocking isn't she? Oh well, with that figure and confidence to wear so little I might be too smile Nice of Dirk to knock her back.

The last scene brought it back on track with Papa Jack explaining what was stolen - good of Zoe to realise she needs to research the history, that's a surprisingly mature thought. Chameleon being all over the options is totally on point and it's god to see you're bringing in Kono to the story, I was probably the only person that liked her in the 5YG stories.

Mordru! It's getting real! I'm looking forward to finding out if he really is coming back or if that was a bluff from you to throw us off scent.

Great stuff, thoroughly enjoyed this IB, and of course I'm eager to read more, more, more!


Legion Worlds Five - is it the end of the Retro-boot Legion as they face an increasingly hostile galaxy and a traitor in their ranks? Awesome ongoing adventures, only in the Bits o' Legionnaire Business Forum.
#944354 - 02/13/18 03:10 PM Re: Mystical Mountains (Post-ZH Legion) [Re: Harbinger]  
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Thanks for your usual thorough comments, Harbi! I always enjoy reading about the little bits that you like, as well as ypour overall impressions.

Originally Posted by Harbinger

You take on Candi is really sweet and kind, though I'm having trouble picturing her as anything other than the Monstress so could you put a reminder of how she appears now please - I did scan back a bit ut didn't fing the poat where she returned. It was well written how she caught and reacted to Brek calling out for Zoe, bless him.

Candi is very observant and sensitive smile I have it that she looks just like she did before (her big hulk-like physique), but in a crystalline body. If she could, she would probably make her appearance more svelte, but I have it that her powers are not that advanced (she is like the Element Lad of the early Preboot, simple transmutations). I also thought it would be better in terms of the diversity of body types, considering the majority of Legionnaires still have the traditional superhero builds!


Originally Posted by Harbinger


Lamprey and Amp being keen and professional was good to see, you've taken those two on an interesting character arc and well done for reminding us that Ming is a little miffed she didn't make it to the main team at the last try out too, hopefully she'll get over that soon.


Glad their heroic journey seems natural for you! They will get more chances to shine soon, as will Dirk and Condo!

Originally Posted by Harbinger


Characters that change into gasses always confuse me, as I wonder if the anaesthetic gas breathed in by the injured would mean there would be less of Vapor to reform when she resumed her human form? Still, nice scene with her helping Dr Shakespeare. I've no idea who Tomb is - sorry I really don't know much about the reboot characters - but it's a neat ability, and him not being a natural ambassador is a good take on having an alien on the team (I assume he's an alien?).



You raise a good point about how Gas Girl's powers work. I have an idea on that, which I may expound later on. But basically, I think she can "borrow" matter from other gases not originally part of her body to reform. But I try not to think of it too much.

Tomb appeared only once in the Reboot, but he has such an interesting look and powerset that I have him here again. And yes,he is an alien from the world of Sarccus.

Originally Posted by Harbinger


As Dr Shakespeare appears to be gay in all the fan fics that are being written her can we safely assume that when/if he appears in a comic there'll have been enough fans that will have read our work that DC will have no choice but to have it as canon? The Legion has always been defined and refined by the fans so I think so smile



This is one of the reasons why I am making my Dr. Shakespeare gay! (or maybe he is bi, haven't decided yet haha).

Originally Posted by Harbinger


Possibly my favourite scene was Tenzil and Calorie Queen's as it really highlighted Tenzil's decency and her keenness. And she'd be a really interesting character to work with so well done for bringing her back. I'm looking forward to seeing where you go with her story.

Candi and Dirks scene was really good too - discussing which Legionnaire was the most focussed and how they've mellowed was a nice way of Candi to encourage Dirk without just telling himto calm down. Veilmist is shocking isn't she? Oh well, with that figure and confidence to wear so little I might be too smile Nice of Dirk to knock her back.



One lovely thing about the Legion is how the more minor characters get a chance to shine! I'm happy to further develop these, like Cal and Veilmist,and to use these scenes to develop the more major characters as well!

Originally Posted by Harbinger


The last scene brought it back on track with Papa Jack explaining what was stolen - good of Zoe to realise she needs to research the history, that's a surprisingly mature thought. Chameleon being all over the options is totally on point and it's god to see you're bringing in Kono to the story, I was probably the only person that liked her in the 5YG stories.

Mordru! It's getting real! I'm looking forward to finding out if he really is coming back or if that was a bluff from you to throw us off scent.

Great stuff, thoroughly enjoyed this IB, and of course I'm eager to read more, more, more!


I also think Kono is too good a character to not use, and as she has appeared before in the Reboot, she is ripe for the picking!

Zoe has definitely matured a lot since the early days, while Cham is so intelligent and observant that it is easy to give him something to do even when he doesn't use his powers much.

Heehee, more on the Mordru mystery soon!

Last edited by Invisible Brainiac; 02/13/18 04:05 PM.
#944355 - 02/13/18 03:11 PM Buried Hope (Post ZH Legion) [Re: Invisible Brainiac]  
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Feel daunted by the length of this thread? You can also check out the Recap Thread to catch up!

VOLUME 4: MOVING FORWARD

Enwa

Ferro, Andrew Nolan of 20th century Earth (USA); previously could turn his body into durable iron, but now stuck in his iron form
Lume, of Silvan; energy being made of light
Nightwind, Berta Skye Harris of Earth (Iceland) and Enwa; wind and air manipulation. Current Legion co-leader.

************************************************************

Ferro stared at the sheets of rain pouring down the windows of Grandma Amihan's little house. He had been told that this was the normal weather here in DIli-Tawi, only kept in abeyance by modern weather control. Yet due to maintenance work, weather control was very much absent at the moment.

He sighed inwardly; time was, he had enjoyed walking barefoot outside under a light rain and feeling like it was washing away all his worries. Now, even he would not feel anything even if he bathed under Niagara Falls.

He shook his head, as if to clear it. There was no sense in dwelling on his condition. Brainiac 5 was already looking into the possibility of having Element Lass transmute him back to flesh and blood, but she would need a lot more proficiency with her powers to do that. He supposed he could wait for the eons it would take; both he and Candi weren't going to age, not in their present conditions.

He sighed and turned back inside. Lume was curiously watching Nightwind and Grandma Amihan play a game that hailed from the far past. There was a two-sided board with two large bowls at the ends, one for each player; and ten little bowls on each side. Each of the little bowls was filled with shells. Players would take turns selecting one bowl, and would drop one shell each into the holes in a clockwise direction. The aim was to get as many shells as possible into the big bowl that belonged to the player. There were, of course, several rules which allowed players to dramaticaly increase the number of shells she could claim, but Ferro paid barely any attention to it.

Instead, he studied Nightwind intently. Several reports had come in recently from Legion World, including an update on the tryouts being planned. The Cadets would be in for quite a surprise... Nightwind had been very quiet about Legion business on this trip, though. The last couple of times Ferro had mentioned one of the updates this evening, she had brushed them off.

He could understand. This was one of their last nights here, and while officially they were on Legion business, it was an opportunity to reconnect. And to think.

He, on the other hand, had too much time to think.

Ferro glanced over at Lume, who was watching the game intently. Although the game could be played on most Omnicoms - Ferro had checked the application store, and it was there - Grandma Amihan insisted on playing with real shells and her antique board, treated so the wood would last. She claimed it helped her think. Ferro believed she just liked the tradition.

He sat there silently for a while. He wasn't lost in the game, but he didn't want to disturb any of the others...

Suddenly, a familiar voice drew his attention. He jerked his head towards the video-screen on the wall. The long-running video-novella (about a pair of twins separated at birth due to some freak accident; Ferro had been enthralled when he saw it, though Nightwind and Lume had made fun of the fact that the plot was so predictable and the acting so dramatic) had been interruped by the voice of Brad Majors, a reporter covering some of the outer worlds.

[i]"Trouble in Enwa! It seems that the maintenance schedule was ill-timed; maintenance is ongoing at a time when large portions of Enwa are being visited by a deadly typhoon bearing heavy rains. Flooding is reported in many outlying towns near the capital..."

Ferro met eyes with Nightwind and Lume. There wasn't any question about their next move.

"I'm sorry, grandma," Nightwind kissed Grandma Amihan on the cheek. "I have to go."

"Of course, of course," Grandma Amihan waved them off with a small smile. "You Legionnaires have your responsibilities."

Scant minutes later, the trio were flying above the streets. Nightwind's face was grim. "The drainage systems have improved recently, but it seems like the local government has not been giving them enough priority..."

Lume shook its head. "Don't blame them too much, Nightwind. You carbonforms have so many physical needs, so I understand the need for your governments to prioritize. And this kind of maintenance is infrequent..."

Nightwind sighed. "I know, Lume. Its just that my mother told me many stories of her youth, when Enwa was still a very poor world. How she would have to wade to school in flood waters waist-deep, and how many lives were lost because... Oh!" Instantly, her voice changed to the sharp commanding tone that she often used in the field. "Ferro, shore up the soil on that cliffside. We must prevent a landslide. Lume, search-and-rescue. Give plenty of light while you're at it. I will coordinate with the authorities."

As soon as Ferro and Lume flew in different directions, so did she. She was confident they would do what is needed. In not much time, she found the local emergency services standing on a tall dump truck. The chief was bellowing into a megaphone, for all the good it could do.

"Let me help," she said. Without waiting for more than a nod, she used her powers to make his words carry far into the night.

Not far from her, Lume had shifted into its normal form - a small glowing firefly. It glew to its limits as it zipped around the area, looking for sentients in trouble. It relied on its eyes, as light was much faster than the sound which would carry to it anyway. Lume went as fast as it could while still being able to register the shapes and figures below it. It stopped upon seeing a pair of small children struggling in the water; Lume quickly shifted into its humanoid form and swooped down. It thanked its lucky star - one that all Silvans had - that it had learned to solidify its limbs without channeling heat and light through them.

"Shinings, carbonforms," it said gently as it hovered in front of the children. "I am Lume of the Legion of Super-Heroes. I am here to help."

"Our mama..." whimpered the older of the two.

"Take my hand," Lume said gently. "And I will help you find her." It fired a beam of light into the sky, the prearranged signal agreed with local services. They would be here in seconds, to take the children that Lume was carrying into the night sky.

Over by the cliff overlooking the town, Ferro had grabbed a scrap of metal from a nearby pile of junk. He had fashioned it into a very crude shovel; easy doings for someone as artistically inclined as him. He quickly programmed his Omnicom to instruct him on how to dig a trench just so in order to stop the landslide. Concentrating on his task, he trusted his teammates to do their part. Heaven only knows how many sentients needed immediate help; but if he did nothing, the whole town would be in even more danger.

It was hours later when the Legionnaires finally paused for more than a few minutes each. Well, for Nightwind, anyway; Lume and Ferro did not need rest, something all three were thankful for. Their speedy action had ensured that the area had no casualties.

After checking that the local services needed nothing more, the three flew home.

"It was good to be in action and help the locals," Ferro said quietly.

"Yes, yes it was," Nightwind whispered. Ferro glanced at her, but her face was expressionless. He supposed she was still feeling guilty about the hostage situation earlier on Legion World.

"Listen, Nightwind..." he began. "You're a great leader and..."

He was interrupted by an intake of breath from Berta. She was staring in horror ahead of her. Ferro followed her gaze, and felt his heart leap.

Where Grandma Amihan's house had been, now stood a big mound of dirt and soil.


************************************
IB's notes:

1) I am describing the traditional Filipino game called Sunka.

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