Legion World Forums LEGION COMPANION Spaceopoly Limericks

cop-out!

your "Cleaver" leave-line was completed; you gotta write one before you can offer another "Next"

remaining on the docket for lack of completion...

NEXT:
Minesurfer and Quislet crossed posts

Are you trying to say that mine wasn't the epitome of a Post Modern Performance Limerick with a disdain for rhyme?

But for one who was coming down on Quislet and his next lines...

Fine we can do it your way...

Minesurfer and Quislet crossed posts
On the board that Scott and Gary hosts.
How did we do it?
Can we get through it?
"I have no doubts!" so this one boasts.

Next:

There was an Olympian who threw a javelin...

There was an Olympian who threw a javelin
It went so high it hit a de Havilland
Helicopter
Which dropped her
Cargo, on the house of Mary Matalin.

NEXT: Neil Gaiman ate a rhubarb pie

Neil Gaiman ate a rhubarb pie
That's the truth, it's no lie
He shared it with Miss Kitty
On a visit to Dark City
Oh this is so bad, I could just die.

NEXT:

American Gods was a boring book

(Editorial insert of quotes)

"American Gods was a boring book,"
Said a critic, but I still took
A look and oh glory!
What a great story!
That critic was a total schnook!

Next:
There was once a Lad named Rockhopper

There was once a Lad named Rockhopper
He loved a penguin teenybopper
She thought he was nice
But stayed home on the ice
Her dad, you see, was a penguin copper.

NEXT: If I had a million dollars to spend

If I had a million dollars to spend
People would ask me to "lend"
them some money
It's funny
all the people who think they're my friend.


NEXT:

Minesurfer & Kent got into a tizzy

Minesurfer & Kent got into a tizzy.
Happened so fast I got a little dizzy.
I turn around and Kent's gone.
A new page sees it's dawn.
Somewhere the Limerick Police are too busy.

Next...

A train leaves Chicago doing eighty...

A train leaves Chicago doing eighty
But has to stop for Warren Beatty
Who's on his way
To Santa Fe
To meet none other than his lady.

NEXT

The little engine thought he could

The little engine thought he could
travel from the farm to Hollywood
the tractor
would be an actor
But his elocution wasn't very good


NEXT:

The jester sang for the king & queen

The jester sang for the king & queen
Played by Madonna and Ben Vereen
It was just a play
On old Broadway
About the fifties music scene.

NEXT:

Take me out to the old ball game

Take me out to the old ball game
Although it seems a bit tame
transform
the uniform
so, it shows the players' shame


NEXT:

It was late at night in the park

It was late at night in the park.
On a jog I began to embark.
When a man in a coat, ummmm...
Flashed me his scrotum.
Now I don't run in the park after dark.

Next...

I recently went on vacation...

I recently went on vacation
I went with Simone the Haitian
We went to Cancun
in time for monsoon
and took part in the evacuation

NEXT:
Minesurfer is not a bad egg

Normally I wouldn't make up a limerick about myself, but you never know when inspiration will hit... and that's one muse I listen too.

Minesurfer is not a bad egg.
Had my right leg replaced with a peg.
But just between us,
I have a huge p3nus,
Thats harder than my mahogany leg.

Next...

A cute young baker named Tammy...

A cute young baker named Tammy
Got hit with a double whammy
Her buns were spurned
Becasue they were burned
When her lover left her for Sammy.

NEXT

Don't you tread on Superman's cape

Don't you tread on Superman's cape
Don't stand out on the street and gape
Don't eat mud
Don't drink blood
And don't keep watching the ticker tape.

NEXT: Where did all the fishies go?

Where did all the fishies go?
All I hear is "I don't know."
"We've drained the supply"
Is my best reply
But at least I've got my shad roe

NEXT:
It's autumn in New York

It's autumn in New York
And Boston, too, you dork.
It isn't so queer
that this whole hemisphere
tilts due to celestial torque.

NEXT:
Would you please come rake my leaves?

Would you please come rake my leaves?
And feel the chill Autumn breeze.
And when you are done,
You can bag them for fun,
Or sort them by hue if you please.

Next...

A tawdry affair quite sordid...

A tawdry affair quite sordid
Was mistakenly recorded
When uploaded
Kate exploded
To see her thighs reported.

NEXT:

There once was a nasty divorce

There once was a nasty divorce
Both sides argued til hoarse
Could you conceive
or even believe
All this fuss over a rocking horse?

NEXT:

Blue Betty needed cheering up

Blue Betty needed cheering up
So I bought her a collie pup
It was a blue merle
Just right for that girl
And on Purina, they did sup.

(Up is surprisingly limited in rhyming possibilities).

NEXT

I think Quisy needs a dog

I think Quissy needs a dog
to get him out of a blue fog
what if he got
a canine robot
Would it be digital or analog?

NEXT:

Semi was voted most likely to...