Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum SHAKES Archives II

Okay, but I owe you one! Enjoy the suite.

STUey, if I make out with you, will your body parts fall off?

Finally it has quieted down in here. I'll clean up for Babette so she can go to the holo-plex. That shall also give me time to contemplate the forbidden dance. This human interaction protocol is quite perplexing. Perhaps I should just work out and concentrate on the physical experience.

Well Troy, as your sometimes, part-time employer, I take the well being of our employees very seriously. I'd be more than happy to help you pratice human interaction and join you in your work out so you can concentrate on that physical experience.

I'd like to match Vee's generous offer, Troy. Between Vee and myself, your aBIlity will by unmatched! *tee hee*

Hi, Mr. Varalent. I would be quite honored if you would work out with me. I hope this will not activate the "fraternization inhibitor" that Mr. Transparent Fellow installed while I am learning appropriate human interaction. My diagnostics tell me that the inhibitor is irrevocably activated for 90 earth revolutions.

Aside from that, how much can you bench?

Miss T, how are you faring this morning? Have the effects of the Future Fizzes diminished? May I offer you an alka-seltzer. "Plop-plop fizz fizz, what a relief it is." Pardon me for an inappropriate attempt at word-associative humor.

I'm as fresh as a daisy, Troy. (Pressing closely against his hot droid form.)

Would you like to take a work break? I'd like to inspect your nethers. *tee hee*

Miss T, you do move quickly. Moments ago, I lamost stumbled across you and Mr. Cobalt engaging in advanced human interaction in the woods. And now you are here. How can that be?

I am off-duty now and on my way to the holo-gymnasium to work-out. I will concentrate on my pectorals, biceps and triceps today. Perhaps I could flex for you afterwards.

(Was that an inappropriate comment?)

I think I've got some mutant Cargggite in my bloodline, Troy. How sweet of you to notice. *flutters eyelashes provocatively*

And, you darling boy toy - slash toy boy - could never be deemed inappropriate. You're merely curious.

I would love accompany you to the holo-gym and enjoy some Fizzes (through SHAKES Tesseract Service System) while I watch you produce artificial perspirant.

Maybe after I watch you flex, I can help you practice some squats.

I am going to be a real boy one day - and now I am sure of it. Just like real boys, I hate squats. Even though I have only a limited pain protocol, they still hurt.

(Pushes Troy down behind the bar and begins kissing him passionately.)

Process this, man-candy!

(As Troy feels Miss T's tongue press between his lips, he experiences substantially heightened activity in his Novo-nueral™ net. Suddenly the fraternization inhibitor kicks in.)

Gasp, golly, gee-wizz Miss T. I am compelled, albiet reluctantly, to comport myself, for at least 89.5 earth revolutions. My fraternization inhibitor prevents advanced human interaction during phase I of the protocol activation. (Roughly translated, I am only allowed to get my kicks with other droids). Maybe when I'm a real boy ...

Troy, I thought you were off to the holo-gym. Please help Miss T. up before you go. She appears to have lost her footing.

Miss T., are you unwell? Perhaps a little rum and cola would help. Shall I send Babette over to discuss pre-Minoan architectural influences in neo-classical design?

Well, I guess I'll never be Troy's Helen. *heavy sigh*

Every LW male eventually breaks my heart, Troy. So I guess that makes you a real boy, after all.

Maybe I'll pop in with a droid alt, later.

I'll take that Future Fizz to go. It just hurts too much *sob!*

Don't be sad, sweetheart. You're much too pretty to cry. I have to let Troy learn about advanced human interaction at a measured pace. Not only could it damage his protocol, he could be a danger to any human he interacted with in an advanced manner. Droids are legendary for their prowess and stamina. Medicus One records have far too many entries for humans who were injured while interacting with a droid in an advanced manner. It's for your own good, Miss T. I know that no human quite measures up to Troy in the perfection of his form and visage, but there is something to be said for "slumming it" once in a while.

Oh, thank you, Semi. *hugs him tightly*

I've just been burned by so many Legion Lotharios, don't you know.

Why, I hear that the boys in the locker room call my heart "tender vittles," now.

At least, I think they're talking about my heart.

Legion Lotharios are legend. Some advice? Hold out. Be a tease. Make them beg. Lead them on and at the last minute - have a nail appointment.

Golly! I have been neglecting my fingernails, lately.

Sound advice from my favorite advisor!

Oh, that reminds me, I need to go have my virtue cleaned after that scoundrel, Cobalt Kid, stained it again. The Sisters are going to be so miffed!

Miss T, don't give up on your search for the perfect LW guy! He has to be out there somewhere!

..and if not, he can always be built!

(Grabs Future and kisses him passionately.)

I'm going to fry her if she keeps getting it on with my man!

(Frisks Future for ownership papers. Frisks him thoroughly.)

(pulls out the ownership papers for Future)

Looking for these.

(stuffs them in her robes)

Frisk him all you want, but in the end, he's all mine.

(walks out of Shakes, and continues her search for Opal, then comes back, get's a drink, and leaves, holding on too the papers)

Those papers weren't notorized, Future, honey, so they won't stand up in court.

(Continues to frisk, Future.)