Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Why I couldn't be the hero...

404. As Saccharin Lad, I was told I was sweet but my powers were artificial.

405. I was rescuing people from
a burning plane, and I forgot to give them parachutes...

406. Mayo Man and Kumquat Lass were already taken.

407. My mentor told me to use my mathematical magic powers to aid the world in a way their systems would appreciate. - Miss Money Launderer.

408. I didn't know how to prioritize my people-saving. I mean, surely saving a cat from a tree is more important than visiting a child in the hospital?

I think so

409. It was an election promise! How was I to know that Alec Holland was one with the entire area? - The Swamp Drainer

410. Omniphobia. Just sayin'.

411. After the cancer deaths caused by Radiation Roy, I just turned around at the try outs and went home - Plutonium Pete.

412. Pete was my ride.--Uranium Ulrich

413. I showed up and called myself the Krypton Kid, which seemed to impress people, but when they discovered that all I did was generate the element krypton, they all seemed disappointed in me.

414. I closed my eyes whenever I used my powers, because I was afraid of watching things get hit. Big mistake...

415. Because I've channeled all my living duplicate selves into a very lucrative online scalping biz. Sold a few of my teammates some slightly marked-up tickets online to an Eagles concert and then they found out. [rolleyes] Why does everyone hate free enterprise so much? That elaborate corsetry I only bought to satisfy the sexist, ageist, body-shaming dress code they put into place over my objections... it ain't exactly cheap. (Also, HELLO it's The Eagles and you deserve whatever you get.)

416. I thought part of being a hero, was giving others the opportunity to sacrifice themselves for me. Who knew it didn't work that way?

417. When I defeated Slugman, with chemical compounds and electrical power, I was charged with A Salt and Battery. Screw'em, I'll take my baseball and bat and go somwhere's else!

418. As The Dancer, I lost my left big toe to The Slingshot Kid in a Flamenco danceoff and completely lost my balance.

*Contributed by my son, Sam.

419. I'm never sure if I'm joining a team or leaving it. - The Brexiteer.

420. I aim for the Lowest Common Denominator, then defuse my critics by claiming to do it ironically. - Any random British comics writer born between 1960 and 1971.

421. 'Cor Blimey Gov! Those Jerries would've won if me fish supper powered footy skills hadn't kicked that grenade into their trench! Thanks to the class system for keepin' me in me place: enlistin' an' eatin' fish 'n chips. - Lowest Common Denominator Man (The Victor 1970 Annual)

LOL

422. Me skills at playin' the keys on the Old Joanna made even Chico Marx sound good. The neighbours beat me to a pulp with their brass instruments, they did.

423. "Where There's Muck, There's Brass!" really didn't take off as a catchphrase outside of Yorkshire. - The Brass Monkey

423. I like getting revenge on people who cross me a little too much...

424. I kept getting crossed - Tic Tac Toe Tom

425. I’m the worst coward ever. Turns out, little children, the elderly and the infirm can’t run away from the bad guy if I don’t carry them...

426. My joints have been on fire.

Kappa, is that a coded reference to Dr. Mayavale?

Just kidding, just kidding.

427. My soul is permanently tainted, because of my demonic family elders.