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Drabbles about our favorite oddball heroes, the Doom Patrol.
1. Paintings
A man walking down the street noticed a rather queer collection of paintings being sold by a woman who looked like Charlie Chaplin’s long lost sister, only a tad… touched. He didn’t realize she was the schizophrenic super heroine Crazy Jane, with 87 amazing alternate personalities. The paintings in question were created by the Hangman’s Beautiful Daughter. Each one was signed HBD.
The man took in a closer look at the paintings for sale. He stopped at one which had a collection of barnyard animals playing poker.
“Hmm, what’s this supposed to be?” The man asked Jane.
“You know that painting of dogs playing poker? Well instead it’s the animals from the Nativity scene.” She cheerily, and somewhat detached, explained. He touched the painting to get a better feel of it.
“Really? Well it’s-”
He moved his hand away when the painting started to quiver, like ripples in a pond, until, slowly, Technicolor animals began pouring out and started swarming the man.
“What the?!” He screamed. The animals started nudging at him, until the llamas began biting his clothes off.
“Oh yeah, my paintings do that sometimes.” Jane said in a voice which had no surprise.
“You mean MY paintings.” The Hangman’s Beautiful Daughter said.
“Sorry.” Jane corrected.
“H-hey! Make them stop, I-Ah!” He started screaming as the tore off all his clothes and started carrying him away. “Ahhhh! AAAAHHHHHHH!!”
Jane watched as the painting animals carried the now naked man down the street to do unspeakable things to him.
“Ooh.”
She took the price tag on the painting, scribbled something on it, and stuck it back on.
NOW HALF-OFF!
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
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