posted
OK, no surprize that I am a big liberal Democrat. However, the more religious members of my family are Republicans and I have seen several of them liking Mitt Romney on Facebook.
But then I read about this letter written by a gay son to his Republican father on the Huffington Post.
Though your public support for Romney doesn’t surprise me, given how open you’ve been about your dislike of President Obama, it does bother me. Since coming out to you and mom nineteen years ago, I’ve watched you vote for the Republican candidates in every major race. Save for the occasional mealtime argument or sarcastic Fox News barb, I’ve held my tongue, despite the hurt and anger that came from watching you vote for a party that has made a sport out of demonizing gay and lesbian people, like me, for political gain. I did so because I never had a solid enough argument that the Democratic Party was wholly different. They often stopped short of institutionalizing discrimination of gays, but were sadly lax on standing on principle and advocating for its eradication. Until now.
...
In any other election, given any other choice, I’d stay quiet. If you, and others like you, wanted to believe the worst about Obama – a good man, trying to do good work – and vote against your interests (Romney’s tax and Medicare plans won’t help you), I’d shake my head in wonder and watch you do it anyway. But this isn’t any other election. This election presents a clear choice between two people whose policy beliefs directly affect the course of my life. Let me be clear: A vote for Mitt Romney is a vote against me. There is no argument to counter that fact.
You might want to argue that you’re not a single-issue voter, but when the single-issue is your own son’s equality under the law, I wouldn’t recommend that argument.
Obviously this letter struck a chord with me. But do I post it on my Facebook wall? My biggest fear is not that my family members will ignore it, but that they will respond and the response will be "sorry no can do". Which will kind of destroy the "don't ask, don't tell" paradigm in the family. And as another part of the letter states because it (voting for Romney) means you believe that I am "less than".
And as I said, these family members are very religious and don't support marriage equality.
So, should I post it on Facebook or not? I know ultimately I have to make the decision myself, but I would appreciate your thoughts on the subject.
-------------------- Five billion years from now the Sun will go nova and obliterate the Earth. Don't sweat the small stuff!
From: Boston | Registered: Aug 2003
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posted
This is a pretty big dilemma, Quis. If your purpose is to get them to change their political loyalties and vote Obama, it may not be the best way (they may not notice it, as you say) plus Facebook postings (in my experience) are most effective with people who already share the same beliefs espoused in the post. A face to face discussion might be more effective here.
Besides your family members' negative response and the dsiruption of "don't ask don't tell", is there anything else you're concerned about?
posted
I understand the temptation, but see the potential for more harm than good coming out of it. I've settled for posting a clip of Gabby Giffords' Pledge of Allegiance on my Facebook, and wearing my Obama pin to family functions.
[ September 08, 2012, 09:08 PM: Message edited by: Jerry ]
-------------------- No regrets, Coyote.
From: Missouri | Registered: Oct 2003
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posted
Quis, I can't honestly say what to do. It's no secret that I'm fiscally slightly conservative and socially slightly liberal.
Sounds like you've reached a break point in your life. You could post it and nothing comes of it. You could post it, there's discussion, and nothing changes. or, everything changes. Or, there is a heartbreaking complete break with family.
I... doubt I will vote. There isn't really a choice for me... dumb and dumber, and they are interchangeable as far as I can tell.
I guess it comes down to how much you want to retain family in your life. I'm a bit coldhearted, I can cut out members that are hurtful to other members of my family with no problem. You...don't seem to be so much. wish I could help.
-------------------- Damn you, you kids! Get off my lawn or I'm callin' tha cops!
cleome46
or you can do the confusion 'til your head falls off
posted
My guess is that your family will ignore it, so you have little to lose by posting. It's your space, so post what you want. Or not.
I write this as somebody who isn't on Facebook. Still, I went way too far Left for my liberal family's taste years ago. Same with most of my friends and my husband. We have occasional skirmishes, but usually everyone avoids politics by mutual consent.
Besides, I've noticed that in every single election in my adult life there's somebody (usually many, many somebodies) asserting that this time it's more super-mega important than ever before which side you choose. At the end of the day, though, it's still the individual's choice who he or she votes for. Or whether they choose to vote at all.
(I also tell myself, for the sake of my own sanity and out of sheer cynicism, that Presidents are basically figureheads who work on behalf of people whose interests in general have screw-all to do with me personally. So it's ridiculous for me to break with a friend or relative over a damn figurehead.)
Also, a vote isn't the sole measure of a person's goodness. I've known people with political views that looked great on paper, but IRL they did some amazingly awful things or were just plain impossible to get along with. The reverse is also not unusual. Life kind of sucks that way. It's just not as well-delineated between good and evil as you'd see in those superhero comics that the kids seem to love.
-------------------- Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on flickr. Drop by and tell me that I sent you.
From: Vanity, OR | Registered: Dec 2008
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posted
I am also a liberal Democrat and I support the President for re-election. Having said that, I have a lot of friends who are Republicans. I firmly believe that friends can disagree.
I try to avoid political posts on Facebook. I know some of my Republican friends post things that offend me and I'm sure that they would be offended by some of the things that I like. Keeping what Eryk posted above in mind, I don't think they do any good anyway.
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
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posted
I ignore people's political posts these days. I can't remember the last time I read something political as said by someone I know and felt better after.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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posted
Quis. The older I get the more liberal I have become. The thing is, a lot of people retreat further into what they "know."
The thing you have to ask yourself is this, are you willing to potentially create a rift between yourself and several members of your family? It might not happen, but if you post something like this, you run that 'risk.'
Nobody can really tell you what to do in the end...it is up to you. Just know that your 'family' here always has your back.
From: Turn around... | Registered: Jul 2003
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posted
I can't see ANYTHING in that letter that would endear me to the "son's" concerns. There is nothing in that letter that would intrigue me to want to share space with that person. It seems to me, emotional blackmail simply because his parents were open about something THEY didn't have to be open about, who they vote for.
Anyhow, if they are that open about who they vote for I can't imagine they care what anyone says, even a "son" but if he really feels who they vote for is THE indicator of their love for him, he and/or they got bigger issues, seems to me.
I know nothing about Facebook but can't you just write your own letter?
From: East Toledo | Registered: Jul 2003
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posted
BB, why do you put the words "son's" and "son" in quotes? It seems to imply that the writer isn't a true son. I don't believe that the letter would be effective. But let's be clear here, right wing politicians have a very long and real history of demonizing and scapegoating gay Americans. Their platform clearly promotes discrimination. Watching our families and people we consider friends endorse candidates who promote this discrimination is a difficult thing. Struggling to figure out how to handle that experience doesn't mean that we aren't true sons and daughters.
-------------------- No regrets, Coyote.
From: Missouri | Registered: Oct 2003
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quote:Originally posted by Jerry: BB, 1) why do you put the words "son's" and "son" in quotes? It seems to imply that the writer isn't a true son. I don't believe that the letter would be effective. 2) But let's be clear here, right wing politicians have a very long and real history of demonizing and scapegoating gay Americans. Their platform clearly promotes discrimination. Watching our families and people we consider friends endorse candidates who promote this discrimination is a difficult thing. Struggling to figure out how to handle that experience doesn't mean that we aren't true sons and daughters.
1) Because it doesn't seem very "son-like" to me.
2) I was generally avoiding politics because it wasn't what I found important about the post but yes, let's be clear.
"Politicians." What is their goal? To get votes. They don't really care who from or how or what they'll say to get them. So now let's deal with "right" and "left." I live in what is generally considered a "left-wing" and "liberal" culture. There is no difference in their feelings on diversity than conservative cultures I've been in. What is said and what is believed are two different things.
I can only react to my thin slice of life and in that thin slice of life I've not found the words "compassion," "open-mindedness" or even "tolerance" to have anything to do with someone's claim to be "left," "right," "liberal," or "conservative."
I've met self described "liberals" who are as intolerant as any and more specific to your concern, would kill someone for being gay without a thought if they could get away with it and I've met self described "conservatives" who believe government has no business in someone's private life. Which would you rather share a planet with?
My thin slice of life says a person's politics has little to do with your concerns.
Kind of off topic but since you want me to "be clear." What is MY opinion on Marriage? That's what you really want to know?
"Marriage" I don't really feel the government should be performing marriages so most of the rest of that debate is moot to me. Government cannot stop people from performing a religious rite. The remainder of the debate is more about the business aspect of marriage, not the love aspect. I don't feel government should have a role in that either, beyond contract law. I don't believe government should be forcing businesses to provide services to someone just because they are "married." I don't believe "married" people should be treated as anything other than two individuals, from a government POV.
Quiz asked opinions about whether he should support that letter. I can't answer for his slice of life so I answered for mine.
I wouldn't want to be associated with that person. Wouldn't matter if I agreed with their position on marriage or not. If it were me that felt a need to make a decision, then I'd just write my own letter.
From: East Toledo | Registered: Jul 2003
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