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CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 81
Substitute
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OP
Substitute
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 81 |
500 Voters were polled for the following questions.
CANDIDATE MOST LIKELY TO HURL HIS/HER FECES IN A FIT OF ANGER
1. LARDLAD 69%
2. Ghost of Numf El 11%
3. Winema Wazzo 8%
4. Kent Shakespeare 6%
5. Actor Lad 5%
6. Calamity Monkey 1%
CANDIDATE WITH THE BEST RACK
1. LARDLAD 80%
2. Winema Wazzo 9%
3. Kent Shakespeare 5%
4. Ghost of Numf El 3%
5. Actor Lad 2%
6. Calamity Monkey 1%
CANDIDATE YOU WOULD EAT FIRST IF YOU WERE TRAPPED WITH ALL ON A BARREN ISLAND
1. LARDLAD 73%
2. Kent Shakespeare 10%
3. Actor Lad 6%
4. Ghost of Numf El 5%
5. Calamity Monkey 4%
6. Winema Wazzo 2%
MOST ARTICULATE CANDIDATE
1. Calamity Monkey 89%
2. Winema Wazzo 5%
3. Kent Shakespeare 3%
4. Actor Lad 2%
5. Ghost of Numf El 1%
6. LARDLAD 0%
Next Poll coming Soon.
Poppa Rotzi, EIC
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 40,350
Trap Timer
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Trap Timer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 40,350 |
Jeepers! This is enlightening, but I hope the next poll includes a question on which candidate is most likely to hurl someone else's feces in a fit of anger!
Given that feces-throwing, edibility, and niceness of rack are all qualities the LMB usually values in a leader, while articulateness isn't, it seems like LARDLAD has a strong initial lead among voters!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634
Bold Flavors
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Bold Flavors
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634 |
I find it very revealing that Winema Wazzo scored lowest among 'most you'd want to eat on a barren island'. Legion World has not forgotten her crimes against it!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 11,186
#deleteFacebook
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#deleteFacebook
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 11,186 |
I suspect a bias towards monkeys and altIDs when choosing who was to be polled...
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634
Bold Flavors
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Bold Flavors
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 34,634 |
The LMB Enquierer? Biased? Why, that's like that time someone accused me of sleeping around!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 40,350
Trap Timer
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Trap Timer
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 40,350 |
Come to think of it... Lardlad's propensity for feces-slinging could be evidence for my longheld theory that he and Poppa Rotzi are, in reality, one and the same!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246 |
Hey! I only sling feces when I'm good and mad! Oh, EDE...accusing me of having an alternate I.D....tssk, tssk
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 33,081 |
Originally posted by Cobalt Kid: I find it very revealing that Winema Wazzo scored lowest among 'most you'd want to eat on a barren island'. Legion World has not forgotten her crimes against it! Heh-- I figured it was 'cause all the straight guys wouldn't want to eat the only chick on the island. Obviously the LMB Enquirer failed to poll a fair amount of gay guys. Although Lardy *DID* come first in the "best rack" category. Perplexing. Perplexing, indeed.
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246 |
Originally posted by MLLASH: Although Lardy *DID* come first in the "best rack" category. By the way, they're REAL and they're FABULOUS!!
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
Originally posted by MLLASH: [QUOTE]]Heh-- I figured it was 'cause all the straight guys wouldn't want to eat the only chick on the island. Well, there's eating and then there's eating!
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,724
Deputy
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Deputy
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,724 |
Originally posted by Kent Shakespeare: Originally posted by MLLASH: [b][QUOTE]]Heh-- I figured it was 'cause all the straight guys wouldn't want to eat the only chick on the island. Well, there's eating and then there's eating! [/b]I like your thinking, Kent. Wait a minute, am I allowed to agree with a fellow candidate? Bugger, I'm confused now.
Hic!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,724
Deputy
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Deputy
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 1,724 |
Originally posted by THE LMB ENQUIRER: 500 Voters were polled for the following questions.
CANDIDATE MOST LIKELY TO HURL HIS/HER FECES IN A FIT OF ANGER
2. Ghost of Numf El 11%
Maybe so, but I've got to be pretty shit-faced first. And why do you think I wear a kilt? And why isn't there a 'Best Ass' category? I'd definitely come first in that - at least since Bevis isn't running.
Hic!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
Numf, I see us as natural allies against the villainy of LardLad. If you back out of the race, I'll name you as Minister of Debauchery after I win.
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
and if you want to be resurrected, I'll plug you into my Dead Superheroes Integrity machine - you'll be back in no time!
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246 |
Originally posted by Kent Shakespeare: Numf, I see us as natural allies against the villainy of LardLad. If you back out of the race, I'll name you as Minister of Debauchery after I win. Villainy? Who's the frickin' Dominator? Whether it was a phase, an alt i.d. or whatever, if it barks like a dog...
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
As Director of External Affairs (tm), it was my duty to try to flush out Dominion spies before the election. If you'd read my confidential executive report like a responsible candidate, you'd know that.
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 103
Substitute
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Substitute
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 103 |
I thought there were supposed to be additional polls? How am I supposed to rebel against the mainstream if I don't have pollsters telling me what the mainstream opinion is?
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
POLL for those who want to rebel and root for the underdog:
LardLad: 35 percent Calamity monkey, Actor, Winema, Numf: 15 each Kent: 5 percent
POLL for those who want to jump on the bandwagon:
Kent: 95 percent Everyone else: 0.3 to 1.5 percent
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246 |
Originally posted by Kent Shakespeare: As Director of External Affairs (tm), it was my duty to try to flush out Dominion spies before the election. If you'd read my confidential executive report like a responsible candidate, you'd know that. Dude. it's all about public perception...kinda why retractions in the papers are always buried on the last page!
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246 |
Originally posted by Kent Shakespeare: POLL for those who want to rebel and root for the underdog:
LardLad: 35 percent Calamity monkey, Actor, Winema, Numf: 15 each Kent: 5 percent
POLL for those who want to jump on the bandwagon:
Kent: 95 percent Everyone else: 0.3 to 1.5 percent So... basically, you're endorsing me for Lucifer Lass?
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
No.
Read it again. Carefully.
LL says she is looking to vote based on rebelling against the polls, so the first poll is for her.
The second poll is for those who want to support the front-runner; so that poll is not for her.
As leader, I pledge to offer remedial reading courses in the near future for those so obviously in need.
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246 |
oh-kaaaaaay.
Hmmm...gotta wonder where you get your info though. I'd say if activity on the campaign threads are a guage, then I've got the edge!
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
Riiiiight..... That's the deciding factor. Go on believing that, amigo.
Or should I say, Deputy Amigo.
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
BTW, "Vote LARD (or if not, just don't vote for Kent)!!" is hardly a slogan a front-runner would come up with.
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: CANDIDATES Summer 2006 BREAKDOWN: Who's Who & What's What
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 29,246 |
Yeah, blame my campaign manager (me). He's not very good at front-runner slogans, I guess.
Still "Lardy" to my friends!
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