Legion World Forums LEGION COMPANION Spaceopoly Limericks

If kids would eat their broccoli
They wouldn't get so colicky
It is know
and has been shown
That kids think it is very icky.

NEXT:

Three guests will visit my house

Three guests will visit my house
One of whom will bring a mouse
To liven up the proceedings
Against my abject heedings
Coz it might frighten the spouse

NEXT: What to do on a weekend

What to do on a weekend?
What about doing some drinkin?
Drinks of barley and hopps,
Hard grains, or just Schnapps.
Until my nose is a red blinkin beacon.

NEXT:

I can't think of a topic...

I can't think of a topic,
But to be philisophic,
To end a line
With a word hard to rhyme
Is a tiny bit misanthropic.

Next:
Legion World is lots of fun...

Legion World is lots of fun.
Even when I've got to run.
Interesting chats,
Nellies with hats,
And new slang learned by the ton.


NEXT:
I rowed the river in a boat.

I rowed the river in a boat
Which i was told would probably float
After a while it was a hell of a bore
Rowing with just one oar
Who knew what i was wearing under my coat?

NEXT: Saturday morning cartoons

Saturday morning cartoons
I haven't seen in many moons
Some bad, some good
A part of childhood
Now I watch soaps most afternoons.

NEXT:

A young lad with a clever mind

A young lad with a clever mind
one who's firm, yet gentle and kind
would find in a minute
my bed with him in it
and that soon he'd be in quite a bind.

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The best thing I did today

The best thing I did today
Was go and sit down by the bay
And watch the birds
Release their turds
On trophy wives out to play.

NEXT:

She left him for another man

She left him for another man
At least that was the plan
She picked a guy
who was bi
and to her ex he ran.

NEXT:

The gay young couple at the beach

The gay young couple at the beach
were barely within my reach.
As they rolled in the sand
I offered a hand
though much more was accepted by each.

NEXT:

While wearing my lycra shorts,

While wearing my lycra shorts,
I like to play outdoor sports
But when I'm indoors
I take off my drawers
And play games of other sorts.

NEXT:

I fixed my hair with a fine bristle brush

While wearing my lycra shorts,
I was going to play some sports
But something did grow
and started to show
As recorded in the arrest reports.

NEXT:


At Aunt Millie's tea party

I fixed my hair with a fine bristle brush
and dressed in a velvet suit - very plush
I was in a spot
my pants I forgot
Because I was in such a very big rush.

NEXT:
At Aunt Millie's tea party

At Aunt Millie's tea party,
The biscuits were delicious, yet hearty.
I heard someone utter,
"They're better with butter!"
These words came from James Moriarty.

Next:

The game is a foot.

edit: The more I thought about the line, the more I had to shorten it. It just wasn't starting out rhythm-wise to be a limerick.

The game is a foot,
Is how it was put.
When the chase had began,
Holmes' pipe in his hand,
Full of tobacco and soot.

Next:

Rachel read about The Vicker.

(edit)
Sorry about answering my own limerick, but the more I thought about trying to rhyme "foot" two times and make sense, the harder it got, and when I finally got something that fit, I couldn't pass it up.

Rachel read about The Vicker
After drinking lots of liquor
She's a punk
when drunk
And got into a fight with her vicar.

NEXT:

On a sunny day in June

On a sunny day in June.
A witch was cleaning her room.
Her time she did bide,
then wound up outside,
flying around on her broom.

Next:

The Cubs stink again.

Sorry about this, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity to be a self abusing Cub fan.

The Cubs stink again.
But you knew that would happen my friend.
Each Spring they start fresh.
Then they lose more than less.
And it's "Wait 'til next year" again.

Next,

My wife has the pertiest face.

My wife has the prettiest face
Full of wisdom and grace
If I ponder
to let my eye wander
She will put me in my place.

NEXT:

A Cubs fan vents his rage

A Cubs fan vents his rage.
Nothing new in this day and age.
But year after year,
In the Bleachers with beer,
To win they require a Mage.

Next:

Not another email from my sister

Not another email from my sister
Though since she's gone, I've really missed her
She's in Tibet
With a monk she met
When she left her hubby who never kissed her.

NEXT:

The life of a dog is really sweet

Ohmygod, I can do this...

The life of a dog is really sweet
being loved and cuddled is neat
and trotting round the track
blue ribbon on my back
means I get a better cut of meat!


NEXT:
My kid sister is such a brat

My kid sister is such a brat
She sat on my favorite hat
So when wearing my tweeds
I can't dress like EDEs
Where's my baseball bat?!?

NEXT:
Rub-a-dub-dub, three men in a tub

Rub-a-dub-dub, three men in a tub
One asked "My back will you scrub?"
Jerry Falwell fainted
said they were tainted
I asked "What's all the hubbub?"

NEXT:

One day I went to the zoo