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Kill This Thread LI - Already???
by Ann Hebistand - 05/04/24 12:22 PM
not just another Pantha's dismembered head thread...
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/04/24 11:54 AM
Who's Who in Raz's Legion? *added RED CROW 3 May*
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/04/24 02:31 AM
Would Kid Psycho be cooler...
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/04/24 02:29 AM
Wheel of Fortune / Hangman Season 3
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/04/24 02:28 AM
Legionnaire Mastermind
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/04/24 02:28 AM
I'm Thinking of a DCU character Part 6!
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/04/24 02:27 AM
The Non-Legion Comics Trivia Thread Pt 5
by Invisible Brainiac - 05/04/24 02:24 AM
Omnicom
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Re: Limericks
#385572 10/03/05 11:47 AM
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611
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Be quiet for I have work to do
Your loud breathing's a distraction, too.
When I hear you sigh
I think,"Oh my, my!"
Work'll wait; so I come visit you.

NEXT:

There one was a welder named Lance.

Re: Limericks
#385573 10/03/05 11:48 AM
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
strange but not a stranger
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strange but not a stranger
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Posts: 57,030
Be quiet for I have work to do
Don't bother me! Shoo! Shoo!
I must be quick
with a limerick,
Because my boss is tapping her shoe!

NEXT:

My boss comes in very late


Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
Re: Limericks
#385574 10/03/05 11:50 AM
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
strange but not a stranger
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strange but not a stranger
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Posts: 57,030
There once was a welder named Lance
After work he would skip and prance
I think he may
be very gay
I met him at the Tea Dance.

NEXT:

My boss comes in very late


Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
Re: Limericks
#385575 10/03/05 12:00 PM
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My boss comes in very late.
Her name is Promiscuous Kate.
She's known for her morals,
Dictations and orals,
And some things I shouldn't relate.

Next:

This here is a "family" board...


Something Filthy!
Re: Limericks
#385576 10/03/05 12:05 PM
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611
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This here is a "family" board...
Uncle Billy Bob said when he scored
another hot date
with his cousin Kate
in the back seat of my Mom's old Ford.

NEXT:

You're disgusting, wretched, and sick.

Re: Limericks
#385577 10/03/05 12:18 PM
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You're disgusting, wretched, and sick.
Came out of Shady's mouth quick.
But no one could harm her
Thanks to her crotch armor,
And the darkness around her was thick.

Next:

A Legion recruit named Canus...


Something Filthy!
Re: Limericks
#385578 10/03/05 12:23 PM
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A Legion recruit named Canus
Had a power that was quite heinous
When that hound was around
We all hit the ground
For he shot lightning bolts from his anus.

NEXT

I can't believe I just said that

Re: Limericks
#385579 10/03/05 12:29 PM
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I can't believe I just said that
or that people came here and read that
This thread has gone bad
but frankly I'm glad
though I rather be with you in bed, Matt.

NEXT:

There's nothing impure in my mind.

Re: Limericks
#385580 10/03/05 12:48 PM
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There's nothing impure in my mind.
But then "impure" should be redefined.
For your view is askew,
From all that I knew.
But then somethings "impure" are just fine.

Next:

There once was a mason from Denver.


Something Filthy!
Re: Limericks
#385581 10/04/05 06:59 AM
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
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strange but not a stranger
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There once was a mason from Denver
Who embarked on an ambitious endeavor
He started inspired
But soon got tired
To inquiries, he responds "Whatever!"


NEXT:

Dude wanted to surf to Japan


Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
Re: Limericks
#385582 10/04/05 07:39 AM
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Dude wanted to surf to Japan.
If he did, he would be, "Da Man".
But said the Dude,
"Hey, What about food?"
And he wiped out on his two cans.

Next:

A man really needs a hobby...


Something Filthy!
Re: Limericks
#385583 10/04/05 11:16 AM
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A man really needs a hobby
Said my young nephew Bobby
So I took pains
To play with my trains
In the Baxter Building lobby.

NEXT:

I like to build model ships

Re: Limericks
#385584 10/04/05 11:59 AM
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I like to build model ships
Pay close attention to the sailors' hips
they're all set in motion
out on the ocean
when the surface rises and dips.

NEXT:

Come sit down beside me; let's talk.

Re: Limericks
#385585 10/04/05 12:11 PM
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
strange but not a stranger
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strange but not a stranger
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Come sit down beside me; let's talk.
Ask any question. I won't balk
I'll let slip
a little gossip
And as the boys pass by, we'll gawk.

NEXT:

A young man preparing for a date


Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
Re: Limericks
#385586 10/04/05 12:20 PM
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A young man preparing for a date,
He hopes that he won't have to wait.
Who is the date with?
Any nice young Miss?
He's hoping it's Promiscuous Kate.

Next:

"I want romance!", she said to her man...


Something Filthy!
Re: Limericks
#385587 10/04/05 12:28 PM
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"I want romance!", she said to her man...
"I can do that, yes I can."
Quislet walked by
I gave him a try
And we walked off together hand in hand.

NEXT:

He stood there alone in Wal-Mart.

Re: Limericks
#385588 10/04/05 12:33 PM
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"I want romance!", she said to her man
And I want to get it as fast as I can
My lips are ready
So put it there, Freddy
But wait, let's get in the back of your van.

NEXT:

The windows were wet and covered with steam

Re: Limericks
#385589 10/04/05 12:37 PM
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He stood there alone in Wal-Mart
Looking at goodies in his cart
There were hand guns
And stockings with runs
Gifts for the gal who stole his heart.


NEXT:

The windows were wet and covered with steam

Re: Limericks
#385590 10/04/05 12:53 PM
Joined: Aug 2003
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strange but not a stranger
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The windows were wet and covered with steam
Things appeared vague like in a dream
The inuendo
Reach a crescendo
And double entendres were the theme

NEXT:

Is Lad Boy trying to get me in bed?


Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
Re: Limericks
#385591 10/04/05 01:22 PM
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Posts: 3,611
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Is Lad Boy trying to get me in bed?
Or thinking of something else instead?
Maybe he's itchin'
to cook in the kitchen.
What's between all his lines that I've read?

NEXT:

If I looked as good as you do

Re: Limericks
#385592 10/04/05 01:37 PM
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If I looked as good as you do
I'd go out and roll in some poo
To keep all the girls
From messing my curls
And pinching my rosy cheeks too.

NEXT:

I locked my self out of my house

Re: Limericks
#385593 10/04/05 01:59 PM
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I locked myself out of the house.
I'd like to get in before my spouse
gets home from France,
cause I'm wearing no pants,
and I don't want her to start to grouse.

NEXT:

My what big...eyes...you have

Re: Limericks
#385594 10/04/05 01:59 PM
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I locked myself out of my house.
I'm just something short of a louse.
But when she's not there,
to defend herself fair.
I blame everything on my spouse.

Next:

I hope my wife never reads that...


Something Filthy!
Re: Limericks
#385595 10/04/05 02:06 PM
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I hope my wife never reads that...
For if she does I am in deep fat
Fried til I'm crispy
Hair no longer wispy
And set out on the front door mat.

NEXT:

My what big...eyes...you have

Re: Limericks
#385596 10/05/05 08:03 AM
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Not "have" again... you know how hard that word was to rhyme the first time?

Oh well... here goes...

My what big... eyes... you have.
I said from the front seat of my Rav.
It's a five speed stick
That I named "Maverick"
That sometimes I shorten to Mav.

Next:

There once was a bar named Shakes...


Something Filthy!
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