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 Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723 |
I once had a crush on a clam,
A bearded one, named Sam
He kept to himself
On a rocky shelf
Deep in the sea of Siam.
NEXT:
What is the meaning of life?
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 16,670
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 16,670 |
What is the meaning of life?
Is it sweet or just horrible strife?
A question one asks
After too many flasks
When you aren't quite as sharp as a knife
NEXT: Once I went surfing in Utah
Legion World's Badwill Ambassador
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723 |
Once I went surfing in Utah
With an Andalusian putah
She had quite a bod
But her accent was odd
When she asked where was the wutah?
NEXT:
Outdoor Miner made that one too hard
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 891
Active
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Active
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 891 |
Miner made that one too hard
But Semi's a modern-day bard
With razor-sharp wit
You know he won't quit
'Til he burns out his memory card.
NEXT:
Went shopping with baby today...
There's room for all God's creatures...right next to the mashed potatoes!
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
strange but not a stranger
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OP
strange but not a stranger
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030 |
Went shopping with baby today
She makes me pay and pay and pay
But it's worthwhile
to see her smile
Much to my accountant's dismay.
NEXT:
My accountant called with bad news
Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 5,452
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 5,452 |
My accountant called with bad news
So I had a case of the blues
I went out one day
To buy a scratchie, you say
I'm a millionaire with really bad shoes
NEXT: Money cures the blues
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
strange but not a stranger
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OP
strange but not a stranger
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030 |
Money cures the blues
But then so does booze
I've been fired
which makes me tired
I think I'll take a snooze.
NEXT:
There was a fly in my clam chowder
Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611 |
"There was a fly in my clam chowder!"
I exclaimed this louder and louder.
It turns out, you see,
there a delicacy.
The Talokian chef could not have been prouder.
NEXT:
Today I feel quite hebetudinous.
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723 |
Hebetudinous - according to word-a-day, is pronounced "heb-i-TOOD-n-uhs" (Just so you'd know where my rhymes come from)
Today I feel quite hebetudinous,
I think I'll forgo all rudeness
Instead I might
Let my mind take flight
Into the sordid realm of lewdness.
NEXT:
The mayor decreed we all must go
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
The mayor decreed we all must go
to see Semi's new art show
t'was quite the bash
Even when Lash
showed up wearing naught but a 'fro
Next:
I really need a new job
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611 |
I really need a new job
with lots of time to hob-nob
With a Semi-transparent Fellow
and a Kid who is Yellow
and a bawdy bike-rider named Rob.
NEXT:
Moday's a great holiday
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611 |
I really need a new job
with lots of time to hob-nob
With a Semi-transparent Fellow
and a Kid who is Yellow
and a bawdy bike-rider named Rob.
NEXT:
Monday's a great holiday
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611
Legionnaire!
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Legionnaire!
Joined: Oct 2004
Posts: 3,611 |
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 891
Active
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Active
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 891 |
Monday's a great holiday
We celebrate President's Day
By luck or by quirk
I don't have to work
So I'm missing the overtime pay.
NEXT: Ol' Dick is a pretty good shot...
There's room for all God's creatures...right next to the mashed potatoes!
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 5,452
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 5,452 |
Ol' Dick is a pretty good shot
His aim was well and true
Twas a pity
He wasn't Walter Mitty
Listening to Bush's gems of wisdom - not
NEXT: Rockhopper's lair is groovy
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
Rockhopper's lair is groovy
I filmed it once for a movie
a sequel was planned
but Bush had it banned
so I had to shoot in Peruvi'
(shortened from the Italian city of Peruvia)
NEXT:
When Brainiac Five plays guitar
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723 |
When Brainiac Five plays guitar
He reminds me of Ravi Shankar
With his Hindu demeanor
He couldn't be keener
If he actually played the sitar.
NEXT:
A siren lured me to her lair
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 16,853
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 16,853 |
A siren lured me to her lair
She had some seaweed in her hair
She spoke in Greek
And said, "You geek!
I really wanted an au pair!"
NEXT: Whatever became of Quislet, Esquire?
Holy Cats of Egypt!
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723 |
Whatever became of Quislet, Esquire?
I tell you my friend, that man was on fire
He ruled the courts
With his knowledge of torts,
What a sad day if he decides to retire.
NEXT:
Lady Cramer slipped out the back door
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
Lady Cramer slipped out the back door
She wanted to jet to Azores
Or maybe Aruba
T'was time to scuba
And winter was becoming a bore
Next:
Semi sued Quislet you know
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723 |
Semi sued Quislet you know
For stealing his blond afro
I can't go out
He said with a pout,
How could Quis have sunk so low?
NEXT
Kent concocted a powerful brew
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 16,853
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 16,853 |
Kent concoted a powerful brew
That made the girls (and not a few)
Run after him
But on a whim
He pursued just one, named Sue.
NEXT: On Friday nights in Idaho
Holy Cats of Egypt!
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030
strange but not a stranger
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OP
strange but not a stranger
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 57,030 |
On Friday nights in Idaho
everyone likes to see a show
it'll do
if not new
As long as it doesn't snow
NEXT:
A sailor with a bum leg
Big Dog! Big Dog! Bow Wow Wow!
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723
Wanderer
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Wanderer
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 7,723 |
A sailor with a bum leg
Go it stuck in a whiskey keg
Gangreen set in
To his chagrin
So now he has a wooden peg.
NEXT:
A parrot walked into a bar
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Re: Limericks
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461
Time Trapper
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Time Trapper
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 29,461 |
A parrot walked into a bar
Turning heads near and far
A woman named Molly
sneered "Nice feathers, Polly!"
The birds replied, "Get lost, crackar"
NEXT:
I got'cher bird right here
The childhood friend Exnihil never had.
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