Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum Cobalt's Office of Security - Original Silver Age Thread!

Maybe Lad Boy should come here and talk to us about ERISA. That will put everyone to sleep and maybe after a nice nap, everyone will be less homicidal.

Or alternativly I could get all nostalgic for a time when killing people was a bad idea. We could all go and make muffins and have home-made lemonade and all have a jolly good time.

Or I could be nostalgic for when I was an uber-powerful demi-god/demon alternate dimension version of myself and the real version of myself *at the same time* and just, you know, wipe everyone out and start again.

Do either of those sound like a good option?

pool party on the roof!

<splash>

HEY!!

Why are you all fighting and stabbing and trying to kill each other?

Aaaw! That's so sweet...it feels just like home.

Poor Viv. She's still as deluded as Reboot said she was. Believing Jailbait Lass had been stabbed...that was a life-model decoy that I sent to Thora back when we weren't on speaking terms. Of course, using jello instead of blood should have been a clue, but alas...

<scoops up Jailbait's 'blood' and eats it.>

Hm. Rasberry.

Besides, my genitals could practically kick any intruder.

Now move along everyone. The LMBP Spectre ensured that I cannot be harmed in the Security Office, much like Calamity Cricket cannot be harmed in his secret cave on Greg Evignan Island. My safety is ensured, although, no need to let go of me Crujeckie

Er, I guess Viv lost her job with all this villainous behavior, but there's a pool party on the roof, so head on up there!

<throws Jailbait Lass in, then does a cannonball>

*SPLASH!*

don't mind the floating bits of carcass ...

MARCO!

<pushes carcass aside>

POLO!

<pushes larger carcass towards Sharky...times it so the big splash should hit the audience...no matter whats in the water...>

<quickly devours the carcass>

hmmmm ... funny, I don't remember killing her ...

hey! who peed?!?

Hm...the latest interrogation techniques didn't produce the best results, but sure were fun. I guess Legion World racketeers really don't like being thrown into Shark Lad's tank!

Hmmmm... note to self: have automatic skimmers installed in pool to tidy up after Sharky... ummmm... interrogates?

ATTENTION: All Security Officers

Well now, with things changing a bit for the LMB, this may be the time to open up the all new 3rd Security Office thread, which will probably happen following the election.

Come to think of it, this could be the time to lay down some concrete ideas on the nature of the Security Office I've long had. Enough of that now though.

In the meantime, I'd like to alert all active security officers that we are to be helpful and watchful during the next two weeks of the LMB leadership elections. Gone are the days of old, when the Security Office was akin to the Praetorian Guard of Roman times, and believed it could use itself to influence the outcome of an election. Now we must be vigilant and a source of reliability to the general Legion World public, as the LMB awaits a confirmation on its newest leader, for the first time in nearly (2) years.

That means no fighting in the streets Hrun and Stoopid Cat.

-Cobalt Kid
Chief of Security

Hmmmm... if I had known dating me would make you go all responsible, Cobie dear, I would have hooked up with you ages ago. Just think of all the money that could have been saved in reconstruction fees alone

But think of how the galactic economy has profited in news media alone since then . We did it for the good of the economy!

At least, thats what my old publicist used to say...

Well, it's done wonders for the engineering and construction industries, but the insurance companies aren't too impressed with having to add "House of Cobalt" clauses to all of their policies

It's good to know that the Security Office stands on guard for thee. Even if we do all have to pay extra insurance for the privilege of stability.

some of us swim ...

<splash>

Perhaps a Security Officer should run for leader? Arachne? Deddy? Hrun? *choke* Everday Girl? I don't think Jailbait Lass could bear it if you left the Security Office to pursue such larger goals!

I'm not so certain that Legion World could bear it if Everyday Girl left to pursue such larger goals

Ohmygod! Me run for LMBP Leader? Not a chance! Nope I'm like not gonna do it!

But if we were to give the Leader the power to like choose who gets to be the King and Queen at like next years Legion World High Senior Prom, then I might like consider running...

The Office of Security fully supports the campaign of Everyday Girl for Prom Queen!

or at least Ms. Congeniality ...

We certainly can't let Everyday Girl run without a partner!

Which is why I volunteer myself to campaign for Prom King!

If elected leader, I will decree that EG and IB are Prom Queen and King!

OH.MY.GOD!

<BLUSH> <GIGGLE> <BLUSH>

LIKE, YESSSSSSS!!!!

ohmygod, Ohmygod!, OHMYGOD!!!!

Yeesh! Dominators and their dictatorships---is that what we really want? Next thing you know, he'll be "decreeing" what kind of cell phone network we have to use or proclaiming that we can only eat cherry cobbler because he doesn't care for peach cobbler! Is this how democracy dies?

EG, I, for one, think you won't need some dictator to fix the vote for you--with those big, sweet eyes and shy, adorable smile, you're a shoo-in, sweetness!