Legion World Forums LEGION OUTPOST Mission Monitor Board Every 10 Years Forum I shouldn’t say this but…

After an hour of internal debate; I’m going to say it anyway, which should not surprise anyone. Considering how often I pop up and post either a Totally Stupid comment as ANK, or a Pompously Arrogant one as SR.

I find lately that I have become hesitant to post things – particularly in back and forth conversation threads – for fear of offending people.

And while I know that that statement has caused a few of you to LOL, it is true.

I also find myself either immediately deleting posts or heavily editing them, for that same reason.

Often something that amuses me or elicits an immediate ‘smart ass’ reaction from me, on later reflection, causes me to wonder if what I intended to say and what I actually said are the same thing?

So I guess what I’m asking is – how many of you go through the same thing?

While I do tend to self-censor my truly over-the-top tendencies , I'm not above posting a knee-jerk, smartass comment against my better judgment ... I've found it's easier to apologize to the truly offended than it is to worry over every little thing that might set someone else off. :rolleyes:

I'd hope any of you would be able to PM or e-mail me if I somehow offended; Sometimes a joke is just a joke, and I don't realize I've struck a nerve.

ANK,

I try not to post "from the hip" as it were.

when I do occassionally post something that on second thought I wish I hadn't, then I am a little more sensitive to my next few postings.

I do think that most of the people here are a bit thick skinned and therefore not so easily offended, able to politely say "Hey your post bothered/offended me", able to accept an apology, and willing to give one if they have offended someone.

P.S.-- Quis, did I offend YOU with my "purposefully obtuse" comment the other day??? If so, I'm sorry...

No I wasn't, although rethinking my response, I was wondering if it could have been read as having been offended.

Me? No, I'm all innocent sweetness and light.

Eh, well everyone knows that I'm not one to hold back. Only usually I do at least leave things a bit before responding. I often have an impulse to say something that might not be wise but I've learnt to leave off for a bit and then if I'm *still* feeling the same way then I'll post. I don't think I've ever deleted any posts or even edited them (apart from for really bad typos, never for actual content though). But I think people'd start to worry if I didn't snap every now and again.

It's a hard judgement call to make sometimes. Some people are definitely easier to offend than others. Usually if I see something that I "could possibly" be offended by, I try to look at it in the spirit that it was posted. Do I think it was meant to be funny, or do I think it was meant to be hurtful.

It's often hard to self-censor yourself, because in all honesty, if a person is prone to taking offense at something, they will find SOMETHING to be mad about. There really is a limit to how carefully you can verbally tread.

It is also important to remember that we have posters here from different countries, different ethnic backgrounds, different sexualities, different general upbringing. A word or a joke that is used freely in one area might be considered highly offensive somewhere else.

Don't assume that just because you find something offensive that it was intended to be offensive. And, in fairness, if you learn that something you consider harmless is highly offensive to someone else, be considerate enough to censor yourself when posting here.

Some things are easier to avoid than others. For instance, ethnic jokes or stereotypes are more than likely gonna offend SOMEONE, whether you mean to or not. Certain words are also likely to be offensive to someone... I won't spell them out, but I'm sure you can figure them out

The bottom line is, although a level of consideration should be involved whenever you are posting, I don't think it's necessary to be over the top about it. I believe that if you ARE offended by something that is said here, then you should be able to calmly mention that here, and I think the rest of us should be considerate enough to respect that and be mindful of that in the future.

Of course, that is my personal view, and may not reflect teh views of anyone else here

Leave it to our beloved Leader to so eloquently express what I wanted to say.


(Although I was slightly offended when she misspelt "the" at the end of her post )

Nicely put Cru!

ANK, don't worry, I feel the same way too sometimes, and my posts are usually very immature in general . Of course, I have offended people before unintentionally, which is a horrifying experience to say the least. In my case though, the poster was such a good guy, he excepted my apology and no harm was done

In general, when I post on this board, I feel like I'm doing so with good friends, so everything I say is usually light-hearted and an attempt at having fun, so I'd never offend anyone, and I usually assume the same of everyone else. I figure we're all here to have fun, and get away from the daily arguements of our regular lives.

Lucien, I'm with you, I've never edited a post. And I never will, even if there's a spelling mistake!

I shall leave that as an example, and shall try to be mindful of that in the future

I find myself relying heavily on graemlins if I think a joke might be misconstrued.

I've never had anyone tell me, publicly or privately, that anything I've said has offended them, although I tend to be forthright in my opinions of comics and certain other things. Sometimes this surprises me, because I've been in other forums where saying "I didn't like such and such story, song, or character" is tantamount to insulting someone's mother. But everyone I've interacted with here seems to be above taking things so personally. It's enabled me to be a bit freer in expressing myself than I normally am.

Still, it is easy to get carried away and say something that, in hindsight, shouldn't have been said. When that happens, all we can do is deliver a heartfelt apology to the offended party, learn from our mistake, and try not to let it cause us undue stress.

[And I edit frequently, ususally for typos. ]

Like us, us, all y???

I've editted a few posts where, in hindsight, I've thought they may be a bit too close to the knuckle. I've PM'ed the people concerned and have yet to receive a "F you" type reply so can only assume that it's cool with them.

Which is nice

And if anyone has been deeply offended by any of my posts all I can offer is a deeply heartfelt "get over yourself already!"

I've read, back in my lurker days, a few storming posts but they don't seem to come up too often here. I wonder if that's because most of the posters here are of a certain age and have enough maturity to read more than the superficial into what's being posted, the posters have enough good manners and grace not to post anything too inflamitory or that as our common bond is a 'silly paper' we have senses of humour fitted as a standard?

While I have been trying to read without comment most of the morning, as I pop in and out of here, (the beauty of 'home schooling' is that breaks are on my schedule) a couple of things strike me.

I should clarify one thing. I have never been personally offended by anything anyone has posted here. Nor am I concerned that someone will post something offensive to me in the future.

I am concerned with being able to get an idea, or more often a joke, written in a way where it is not unintentionally offensive. I know that this concern can't be unique to me, so I asked.

The one thing I cannot control is the person who is looking for a reason to be offended, fortunately that person, and no I am not referring to anyone in particular, does not seem to post here.

Thanks guys, I'll go back to reading. (for now)

I do self-censor, usually the smart-ass stuff when a discussion seems to be getting a bit heated because I don't want to make things worse. But I will disagree with people and don't think that should ever be construed as offense.

Funny, I was thinking about this this morning. If someone means to offend/insult you, why give them the satisfaction of being insulted? If I'm getting obviously flamed, I just walk away; not much point in returning the fire. And if offense is unintended, if something just came out wrong or someone misread the situation (such as making fun of something that's important to me), well, why get offended there? I agree, it's best to mention it, whether publicly or through private message, because most, if not all, of us don't want to step on toes and hurt feelings.

I'm always aware of trying not to offend anyone in the sense that I always strive for clarity on something I post -- it's not a matter of sensoring myself as it is finding the right words to get across what I want to say. I don't think I've had any hard feelings about anything anyone here has said anyway, so it hasn't really come up (the Green Lantern boards on the other hand, oh boy... ).

The closest I come to sensoring myself of editing a joke is when I reread it and realize that the humor is really carried in the "tone" of how it's read (or how I hear it in my head) and that someone reading it with a different tone might misconstrue the meaning (this happens a lot with sarcasm -- graemlins are good to help get that across though).

[Princess Crujectra]
{[...] I try to look at it in the spirit that it was posted. Do I think it was meant to be funny, or do I think it was meant to be hurtful. }

That's very interesting.

{[...] in fairness, if you learn that something you consider harmless is highly offensive to someone else, be considerate enough to censor yourself when posting here. }

That's even more interesting.

I'm glad you find me interesting, Grey, but I fail to see why you chose to quote me. Is there something particular you are trying to say that I'm missing?

I shouldn’t say this but…

in junior high, I had the hugest crush on Debbie Gibson ...

maybe what I meant to say was, "I shouldn't admit this but ..."

Debbie Gibson took your fin?

not, but I just couldn't "Shake her love."

<splash>

Hmmm... Is it safe to post on this thread yet?


Truth and Justice shall Prevail!
(ready to duck and run)

This has got to be the lamest ass thread I have ever seen on this or any other message board. If such things were archived by the Library of Congress, these posts would no doubt make us the laughing stock of the 31st century.

Of course I self-censor! Duh!

Finally, an honest answer!

yeah well, I self-pleasure too, but I don't go announcing to the world!


oh, wait a minute ...

<splash>