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Very nice Dean! You really told a cool story with a lot of interesting twists. Well done! Let's see some more!
From: San Diego, CA | Registered: Jul 2003
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quote:Originally posted by Eryk Davis Ester: Hmm... what's nice is that although Dawny and Drake separated in order for their respective physical healings to take place, it's implied that they still have a lot of spiritual healing left to do, and that they will achieve together.
Exactly! What's fun is that we don't yet know how many bumps will occur along the road. Drake's situation is similar to what many families live with today. He's the father of a child, who's mother he doesn't love or want to be with. How will they arrange all this?
I'm pleased with my idea that there is incredible power on Manna-5, but under the control of a couple of flakes. That was meant to echo real life, too.
Dawnstar has to search her soul to see if she can be with Drake in Dirk's body. Can she kiss Dirk's lips even though Drake is the one bringing them to her?
I really enjoyed working on this. I wish I could spend more time on finished art instead of just rough breakdowns.
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Thanks for sharing -- it's always great to see someone contribute with an obvious enthusiasm for the characters. I'm definitely interested to see where this goes. Wildfire with a real body though?? I dunno ... I just love the faceplate too much I think.
I'd still love to one day see what finished work from you would look like.
From: New York, NY | Registered: Jul 2003
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posted
I fully enjoyed this latest 16-page story. Many arcs of emotion got across to us in a minimal positioning of several characters. That Dawny swooped in at the end to rescue Drake and his child was elegant, appropriate, and exciting, all at once.
It did have one touch, though, of its being abrupt to me: Dawny wouldn't have reacted to such a sudden reversal of their status quo over many years with a mere "Nice body." Even with being more recently emotionally estranged, even with its being a healed version of a body once used by Dirk, she would have been quite joyous for him about that change.
Sixteen pages can't tell everything, I admit, and that's still only a minor point against your creativity here, Dean.
I can appreciate your storytelling impulse, and I'm glad to see it ... yet I'd still be excited by seeing a more finished version of some of these panels, some day. Such as Dawny staggering at last into the air with full wings and aching grin (and that was a nice transition to the mother's labor). Or Dawny's pulling father and son so adeptly out of harm's way.
From: Starhaven Consulate, City of Angels | Registered: Jul 2003
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Interesting story, Dean; it shows how life can get a little messy sometimes - but ends with hope. I'd like to see the post-rescue conversation between Dawnstar & Wildfire expanded upon - or continued! They've both changed, but they both care for each other. I could see her saying something curt to Drake - her taciturn way of dealing with many mixed emotions when she first sees him and his son.
Loved the little details you add in - her star on the chain, the burnt Dirk figure as he was in 5YL, the Wildfire symbols reflected in Dawnstar's eyes.
posted
I always seem to be late in getting these in! It's especially hard to follow Dean's amazing story and all the other great poems, pictures, and entries!
A simple pen drawing I did at work. Given a sad background in Paint to make me feel happier.
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I had the center and right Grell watercolor scans, but not the one on the left. Thanks for posting them! Did you buy any of these as original art? He clearly still relishes drawing her.
(Oh, and thanks for reading my story in Elfwood ... nice to see "wow wow wow"!)
From: Starhaven Consulate, City of Angels | Registered: Jul 2003
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