posted
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The Fortitude of Lian Harper
At night, the city never sleeps. Especially MY city. My black angel. You're down there, I know you are. Just waiting for your chance. You criminal evildoers, dead set in your crusade to cause havoc and chaos. Well, you took something important from me so long ago, and I'll make sure you never do it again. You hear me?
I am vengeance!
I am the night!
I am-
"Going to be in big trouble if you don't go to sleep, young lady."
Lian looked up at her dad, Roy, who was peeved that she was still up past her bedtime, and still running around in that Batman costume she got three days ago.
"The Dark Knight doesn't need sleep!" Lian growled in her best Uncle Bruce impersonation. Roy rolled his eyes.
"Well in this house she does."
"Bah! I am the Grim Avenger of Justice, and I cannot sleep so long as there is criminal scum roaming the streets of my fair city!" Lian held her cape up in the same menacing way as the Bat does when he wants to cast his shadow on the bad guys. Of course, it didn't work in this case, considering she only came up to her dad's knees.
"Okay Grim Avenger, you can stay up as long as you want. You just won't get pancakes for breakfast." Roy threatened.
"Night daddy, love you!" Lian shouted as she scuttled under the covers.
CLICK.
Went the lights as Roy shut them off and left the room.
"I'm gonna kill Short Pants for giving her that costume." He muttered.
posted
Inspired by another story on fanfiction.net.
The Wrath of Booty Man
"Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BOOTY MAN! Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BOOTY MAN! BOOTY MAN! BOOTY MAN!"
Lian had been singing that song nonstop ever since her dad pulled out of the driveway with her surrogate uncle Dick joining them. The song, a very, very, VERY non-helpful reminder of a drunken excursion Dick had taken, had got on his nerves the minute Lian opened her mouth. Now he wanted to kill Roy and string him up like a Christmas tree. Of course, he was enjoying ever second of his daughter's melody.
"I hate you, you know that? I really, really do." Dick growled in a very Bat-esque manner.
"Lighting UP, Short Pants! She's just singing." Roy told his former teammate.
"Yeah, about a certain little you-know-what on my you-know-where." He said. The you-know-what being a tattoo of the Batman symbol, and you-know-where being, well, she was singing "Booty Man".
"Which YOU paid for with your own money and which YOU also got of your own volition." Roy pointed out.
"Ooh, volition, pretty big word coming from you, Speedo."
"BOOTY MAAAAAAN!"
Lian finished. She took a deep breath and began to
"LIAN! Honey, you've been singing that song for over an hour now. Don't you think it's time you tried singing something else?" Dick nonchalantly pleaded.
"But I like this song." The little girl said from the backseat.
"Yeah, well, princess, you know how I feel about that certain little… episode, I had." Dick explained.
"But-"
"Now Lian, if Dick wants you to stop singing that song, you stop singing it." Roy gently, but firmly, told his daughter.
"Okay, daddy." Lian said.
"Thanks, Roy." Dick said with a look of surprise. It was rare he saw Roy ever act THAT serious, even with Lian.
"No prob, that song WAS getting kinda annoying anyway." Roy waved it off.
Dick sighed and took in the peaceful quiet that now pervaded the car's air, until-
"Booty Man! Booty Man!" Roy sang at the top of his lungs to the tune of a certain archanid super-hero's theme song.
"Does whatever a booty can!" Went both father and daughter at the same time.
Dick groaned and started hitting his head on the dashboard, all the while thinking:
I wonder if they have any vacancies at Arkham this time of year?
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
The Outsiders and the Justice League, teaming up to deal with the mutant offspring of Charaxes, formerly Killer Moth, cross-bred with the DNA of some of the worst and deadliest villains ever to scar the face of Earth.
It was now down to Arsenal and Wonder Woman as the two faced off against Charaxes and the new Brainwave, the one commanding the fleet. Roy was trying his best to hold off the mutant insect man when his phone started ringing. At that moment Wonder Woman managed to get the giant bug off him before his digestive juices managed to burn off his soul patch.
"Now is REALLY not a good time, Mia!" Arsenal yelled in his phone.
"Daddy?"
"Lian?"
"Daddy! I, I had a…" Lian's voice trailed off as she started crying on the other end of the phone.
"Lian? Lian?!" Roy yelled.
"Witless fools! You have no possible means to defeat our army!" Brainwave cheered.
"It's going to take everything we've got," Batman stated, "but we have to-"
He was cut off by the sight of two napalm arrows and a taser arrow fired off at the two villains.
"AAAAAHHHHH!!!!" The two screamed as they were singed/electrocuted into submission. The rest of the clones shut down almost immediately.
"Whoa." Nightwing said. "Good job-Arsenal? Where'd he go?"
…
"LIAN!"
"Roy!" Mia yelped in surprise when she saw her surrogate brother charge through the front door. "How'd you-"
"Where's Lian? What's wrong?" He asked as he grabbed Mia by her shoulders.
The sound of crying coming from behind Mia alerted Roy to his angel's presence. She sat on the couch, crying, holding up a bandaged hand. There was blood on the Flash t-shirt her uncle Jay bought her.
"Da, da, daddy…" She hiccupped as she cried.
"I was in the bathroom when she dropped a glass." Mia explained. "She tried to clean it up herself and she cut her hand."
"Does she-?"
"No, she doesn't need stitches. I checked." Mia explained. Roy sighed.
"I'm sorry, I didn't muh-mean to." Lian cried. She'd never got hurt that bad.
"Oh baby, it's okay." Roy said as he held his daughter in his arms and tried to wipe away her tears.
"Roy how did you get here so… oh."
Mia trailed off when she saw the high jacked Batmobile parked across the front lawn of the house.
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
Roy turned on the radio station to classic rock. It was his, and his daughter's favorite. They had similar taste in music.
Not that she could complain, mind you. She wasn't even old enough to talk.
Roy picked up little Lian out of her crib this fine, sunny morning in the City of Angels.
"Morning, princess. You sleep well?" He asked her. She just cooed. Roy smiled, until a certain odor hit his nostrils.
"Whoo." He said. "Come on, let's get you changed, you smell like your uncle Salad Head."
She laughed. Even more proof. They had the same taste in jokes.
He sat her down on the changing table and got ready to clean her up. He disposed of the befouled diaper and got ready to put on a new one when BAM! He got hit by a liquid stream.
"Hey!" He cried out as he got out of the way.
Roy looked down at the Blue Valley Soldiers jersey Wally had lent him. Lian giggled as Roy examined the now soaking Blue Valley Soldier. She'd hit him directly.
"Wow. Perfect shot." He said, impressed.
Yep, she was definitely his kid.
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
"Groove evening, viewers! This is Ulala, reporting to live from the Space Port! I've got a report stating that those nasty aliens are invading and forcing people to dance!"
"All lines are clear, Ulala. Get ready to take them out!"
"Roger! Uh oh! They've got some poor man and they're forcing him to dance!"
"Be sure to be ready to shoot when they aim at you."
"Got it, Fuse! Chu, chu, chu!"
"Whoa, Lian. What does 'chu' mean?"
Roy interrupted the show with that question.
"Chu, daddy! It's what you have to say when you have to shoot the aliens." Lian explained to her dad, still sporting two casts on his legs. She was putting on a pretend theatre to try and keep him from going crazy.
"Well why don't you just say shoot?" Roy asked.
"Because that's not what they say in the game, daddy!" Lian explained.
"Well, I'm sorry, sunshine." Roy apologized. "Go on."
"Ready, Uncle Bruce?" Lian asked to her uncle across from her.
Batman scowled, again, at the fact that Lian had talked him into staying for a little bit. And now he was wearing a pair of alien antennae and had up a fake ray gun.
"Chu." He deadpanned.
"Chu!"
The only thing that cheered Roy up more than his daughter laughing was the excellent amount of blackmail and Christmas card material in front of him.
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
"H'llo?" Lian asked to the person on the other end of the phone. A gravelly voice replied.
"Harper, where are you? We have a League meeting today and you-"
"Hi Uncle Bruce!" Lian happily answered, recognizing her uncle Batman.
"Oh, Lian. I'm sorry. I thought you were your father."
"No, daddy can't come to the phone right now." Lian explained.
"I need to talk to him." Batman stated.
"I'm sorry, it's just, daddy got pretty hammered last night." Lian told him.
"What?" Batman flat out asked.
"Yeah, he came home and he was hammered pretty badly." Lian said. "He can't even get out of bed. I had to bring him breakfast in bed."
"That figures." Batman muttered on the other
"We're eating breakfast in bed. I made him some Captain Crunch and coffee just the way he likes it." Lian explained proudly. "He said I did it perfectly."
"I'm sure you did, angel. Hold on, I'm coming over right now."
He hung up. Two minutes later, via JLA teleporter, the Dark Knight materialized in the Harpers' living room.
"Harper thinks he can get out of a JLA meeting just because he spends the night drinking, not on my wa-"
"UNCLE BRUCE!"
Lian ran into her surrogate great uncle's arms.
"Lian?" Her dad called out from his bedroom.
"Daddy, look who's here!" Lian dragged Batman by his hand to her dad's room.
"Harper. Don't think because you go out all night boozing it up means you can shirk your…" Batman stopped in mid-sentence.
"Yes?" Roy asked, sitting up in his bed and sporting not one, but TWO casts on his legs and a bandage on his forehead.
Lian ran up to her dad and bounced down next to him on his bed, spilling some crunchberries in the bed.
"You were saying…?" Roy asked.
"How did THIS happen?" Batman asked as he recomposed himself mentally.
"You know Solomon Grundy?" Roy asked. "Apparently he doesn't like taser arrows."
"I told you daddy got hammered last night, Uncle Bruce."
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
Lian looked up from the picture book she was reading, "The Very Bestest Picture Book My Mommy Ever Bought Me" by Markie Schwartz,
"Whatcha doing?" She asked.
"Oh, I'm just feeding Slim and Wadsworth before I leave." Her babysitter explained.
"They're very pretty." Lian said.
"Why thank you." Her sitter smiled.
"One time my daddy got me a fish from the carnival, but my uncle Garth didn't like them being inside a glass bowl, so I let him put them in the ocean." Lian said. "Because they should be with their mommy and daddy."
"That's a very nice thing you did, Lian." Her sitter sat down next to her. "Do you like the picture book?"
"Yeah, it was a lot of fun to read." Lian said.
"Well good. I borrowed it from my brother's library, and he's got lots and lots of books. I'll get you some more when I come back, kay?"
"But, when is daddy gonna pick me up?" Lian asked.
"Don't worry, you'll see your daddy soon, until then you just get as comfy as you can. Okay?"
"Okay."
"Good girl." Her sitter kissed her on the cheek. "Now, what kind of books would you like this time?"
"Ones with supaheroes like my daddy." Lian said.
"I think I can manage that. Now don't go anywhere. I'll be right back. You promise?"
"Promise. Cross my heart and hope to die."
That just made the woman laugh and ruffle Lian's hair. Her sitter got up from the couch and walked out the door.
After she left, Lian was trying to remember the name of the pretty necklace her sitter had on. She believed it was called an ankh.
"I really hope I go home soon. I miss daddy." Lian said to the two fishes.
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
Lian sighed. Then she straightened up and walked over to her dad.
He had never lied to her before about anything, and she believed that he wouldn't start now. That was one of the things she loved about her daddy.
This question, this burning question, had been bothering her for days. Plagued her mind like a rat going through a maze and constantly going to dead ends.
She figured she could probably look it up on the computer, but her dad didn't really like her spending time on that thing because he didn't want her to turn into a vegetable. He wanted her to get plenty of exercise and to actually want to go outside of her own free will.
She hoped he would give her the right answer, or that he knew it. But, it was now or never.
She walked up to her dad and tugged at his pant leg.
Roy looked down at his daughter.
"Lian? What is it?" He asked, noting the look on determination on her face.
"Daddy, do ants fart?"
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
Roy did just that. This was the first time any one of Lian's teachers had ever called him in to school.
"So, what exactly did my daughter do?" Roy asked her teacher.
"Look, I apologize for having to call you in, but it was for a good reason." The teacher rubbed her eyes. "It's because, well, Lian's a good girl, very bright, but she has this penchant for making up stories."
"Stories? What kind of stories?" Roy asked.
"Stories about how you run around in a bright costume saving the world and chasing bad guys, and that her mother is some international assassin. Just this morning she was telling the rest of the class about how you apparently stopped someone called the Anti-Monitor from erasing the Justice League of America from existence!"
Roy sighed and rubbed his temples.
"I am so, so sorry, Ms. Robinson, believe me, when I get home I'll have a talk with Lian."
"See that you do."
And that following evening…
"Lian, your teacher talked to me today about you telling stories?" Roy asked.
Lian gulped.
"Lian, how many times do I have to tell you, it wasn't the Anti-Monitor, it was Krona, KRONA, who tried to erase the Justice League from time."
"I'm sorry, daddy." Lian apologized.
"No harm done, just get your facts straight the next time, kay?"
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
"Okay everyone, let's play Teen Titans." Offered Iris West, the daughter of Wally West. She was with a bunch of other little kids at a function for the Teen Titans, young and old.
"I'm Wonder Girl!" Milagro, Blue Beetle's little sister said.
"I'm Aqualad!" Julienne, the daughter of Mirage claimed.
"I'm Kid Flash!" Iris West shouted.
"And I'll be Speedy, just like my dad." Lian said.
"No way! I'm Speedy!" Jai West, Iris' brother said.
"Then who do I get to be?" Lian asked.
"How 'bout you be Robin?" Iris asked.
"Okay! I'll be Robin!" Lian stated.
And somewhere, Roy Harper clutched his chest in pain. As if someone just drove a dagger made out of ice right through his heart.
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
The bloodshed, the carnage, the destruction. All about to end.
The battle of the generation gap. The old vs. the new. Batman vs. Superman. It now become Them Vs. the World.
Dinah, the closest thing she had to a grandma, lay there with a bullet in her skull as Grandpa Ollie cradled her body. Tears ran down his eyes as he was joined by their daughter, the third Black Canary.
She looked at her father, looked at Red Arrow, and then, she looked up in the sky.
It, it looked Captain Marvel, but what was he… no.
A bomb. THE bomb. That’s when she knew.
She didn’t say anything, nothing, all she did as the sky lit up. All she did was reach for her father and hugged him. Hugged him tight. Her eyes shut. She didn’t want to see. He didn’t want to see.
They closed their eyes, and mouthed something to each other. They knew exactly what it was, even if it couldn’t be heard over the deafening…
“SHAZAM!”
That was followed by…
BOOM!
There are many ways to die, but for Lian Harper, the Red Hood, this was the only way that could make it seem right.
-------------------- I want to be hated by lies - Bring Back Lian Harper
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