posted
Lardy can cause water to become as hard as wood and form it into a long rectangular shape. This can then be used in construction.
Next: Coffee Break
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
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cleome46
or you can do the confusion 'til your head falls off
posted
Lardy's specially roasted blend of beans makes a home brew so potent that it can crack any mug on impact. However, the reserved grounds can also be used to seal the fissures back up again.
-------------------- Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on flickr. Drop by and tell me that I sent you.
From: Vanity, OR | Registered: Dec 2008
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Arm Fall Off Boy
Now starring in his own DC Comic, September 2011!
posted
Much like Superman, Lardy's solar powered. However, he must absorb the sunlight directly thru his solar plexus muscles (they're under there), which act as solar panels.
Next: Fleet Enema
-------------------- Long Live all them Legions!
From: North Carolina | Registered: Feb 2008
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posted
Lardy can cause an entire navy to--er--evacuate simultaneously.
Next: Rumor Mill
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
| IP: Logged |
cleome46
or you can do the confusion 'til your head falls off
posted
Lardy can fix any mill wheel to turn continuously on the power of gossip alone! This comes in very handy during the dry season when the river tends to be a bit on the low side.
Next: Five Card Stud
-------------------- Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on flickr. Drop by and tell me that I sent you.
From: Vanity, OR | Registered: Dec 2008
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posted
This is the power Lardy uses to hang pictures and shelves. When he throws playing cards at a wall, every fifth card will stick to the wall wherever there is a stud. Thus Lardy knows where to drill (or hammer)
Next: Bark at the Moon
From: Fort McMurray | Registered: Nov 2004
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Arm Fall Off Boy
Now starring in his own DC Comic, September 2011!
posted
Used to scar particularly superstitious villains into thinking there's a wolf/ werewolf after them. Lardy uses this only on nights with a full moon.
Next: Fire in the Hole
-------------------- Long Live all them Legions!
From: North Carolina | Registered: Feb 2008
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cleome46
or you can do the confusion 'til your head falls off
posted
Like the legendary British delicacy Toad-In-The-Hole, but much, much spicier. Lardy's version contains a clever distillation of grain alcohol and ground-up Habanero peppers.
Unfortunately, the one in a thousand villains it doesn't kill tend to become stronger after ingesting a faceful of it. (See entry on "Superboy Prime.")
Next: Ambient Sound
-------------------- Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on flickr. Drop by and tell me that I sent you.
From: Vanity, OR | Registered: Dec 2008
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posted
Lardy has the power to produce low-level, background noise, which is perfect for distracting evil-doers into thinking nothing is going on.
Next: Music of the Spheres
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
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posted
Lardy can make music utilizing two spherical parts of his anatomy.
Next: boobies
-------------------- Five billion years from now the Sun will go nova and obliterate the Earth. Don't sweat the small stuff!
From: Boston | Registered: Aug 2003
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posted
Because Lard Lad really really likes boobies, he has developed the ability to correctly guess any villainess' cup size just by feeling up her evil bazoombas.
Next: Mutton chops
Registered: Dec 2006
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posted
Lardy has the uncanny ability to teach sheep karate. Cobie beware!!
Next: Call Forwarding
From: Fort McMurray | Registered: Nov 2004
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cleome46
or you can do the confusion 'til your head falls off
posted
Lardy can distract the opposing team's forward during a tough soccer game, merely by shouting the word, "Notlob" once from any spot inside the stadium. The goalie for his team then acquires a valuable additional five seconds to keep the ball from the net!
Next: Parrot Sketch
-------------------- Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on flickr. Drop by and tell me that I sent you.
From: Vanity, OR | Registered: Dec 2008
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posted
Lardy can sketch a parrot, which will then come to life to do his bidding for exactly the amount of time it takes to quote a certain "Monty Python" sketch, at which time the parrot rings down the curtain and joins the Choir Invisible.
Next: In the Wink of an Eye
-------------------- The only character in all of literature who has been described as "badnass" while using the phrase "vile miscreant."
From: The Pyngwyn Colonies of Planet Hyustyn | Registered: Aug 2005
| IP: Logged |
cleome46
or you can do the confusion 'til your head falls off
posted
While hitchhiking on a starry night through the legendary citrus groves of Texas, Lardy refused a mysterious sprite's insistence that he "Go ahead and just take those grapefruits, Bub. No one's looking." Turns out the sprite was none other than Rio Star, Guardian Spirit of Domestic Citrus. In reward for his goodness and honesty, Rio Star bestowed Lardy with the power to spit grapefruit juice into the eye of his enemies at will;as well as immunity to any citrus-related attacks from his enemies, of course.
Next: Weekend Pass
-------------------- Hey, Kids! My "Cranky and Kitschy" collage art is now viewable on flickr. Drop by and tell me that I sent you.
From: Vanity, OR | Registered: Dec 2008
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![[Fruit Boy]](graemlins/FruitBoy.gif)
