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Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term Part III: Anecdotes and Adventures During Princess Crujectra's Term (Part I)
With the LMB firmly planted on Legion World, the ongoing construction of Legion World and the capital city continued with bold strides being made. The political and economic structure was also fleshed out, as other problems were dealt with. Most importantly, a continued large number of people migrated to Legion World, some even with super-powers of their own that wished to join the LMB.
- Danny Blaine journeys to Legion World, where he shows off his new powers to the LMB’s amazement. He is quickly inducted into their ranks.
- Blockade Boy, a hero that once fought alongside the LMB on Earth finally leaves Earth, preferring the company of his friends. He ventures to Legion World and is officially inducted into the ranks of the LMB.
- Many others migrate to Legion World upon hearing of the new home of the LMB. Kid Psychout, a longtime LMBer that had not been with the team in awhile, is one of many that venture to Legion World but elect to not remain on the active roster, much like LardLad, Loser Lad and others who are busy with day to day activities. Mondo Joe X and others do the same, and even Shark Lad is rumored to have entered Legion World.
- The Psyonion Embassy is constructed on “Embassy Row” which inspires the idea to set up a long line of buildings to act as Embassies. Thus, the great city of Legion World begins immediately to become a center for diplomatic peace, much like the Earth was of old. Diplomatic relationships with Earthgov, which ceded from the UP, remain non-existent.
- The street intersecting with Embassy Row, Legion World Way, becomes the other main center of commerce and employment, as does “Legion World Main Street” (which run parallel) becomes more viable. “Kid Prime’s Room” is one of the many buildings that adorn Legion World Way.
“ Lurkers Reveal Yourselves!” The lurking class begins to fill out the majority of Legion World’s population, as many lurkers venture to the planet and interact with the LMB on a limited basis. However, the new energy in the LMB, now that they had a new home, began to push many of these lurkers to come out and join them. Thus, Super Lad Kid, who was once an LMBer long ago, but then died and was only brought back by a glitch in the time stream during a great rift, officially de-lurks and announces his presence to the LMB. Further, another lurker, Semi-Transparent Fellow, officially de-lurks for the first time as well. Both Super Lad Kid and Semi-Transparent Fellow show off their powers and impress the LMB greatly, and become fast members of the LMB, as well as prominent members of the Legion World community.
- Varalent, a previous LMBer who was ‘lost’ during the escape from Earth, finally makes his way to Legion World after a perilous journey. His former allies and friends Kid Prime and Eryk Davis Ester quickly welcome him back into their ranks.
- Lightning Lad and Nightcrawler decide to cut off all diplomatic relations with Earthgov, which receives a hearty round of support from the rest of the LMB.
- The party atmosphere surrounding Legion World quickly takes on a life of its own and everyday flirting and fun become a prominent stay of the LMB lifestyle on Legion World, both day and night. This in turn plants the seeds for many ideas on how to build upon an entertainment industry on Legion World to benefit its citizens.
- While on a mission exploring the edges of Legion World space, Lash Lad spots an attractive young man named Icefyre, who also has a super-power. Icefyre impresses Lash with his control of ice and fire, but moreso for his super-flirting abilities, which suggest that he may be the biggest flirt of all! Lash Lad quickly invites him to Legion World, and Icefyre joins the LMB!
The First Legion World Army Despite the excitement happening planet-side, the dangers of the universe remain a very potent and real fact. The Barbarian Hordes continue to carve out large areas of the universe for themselves, most deadly of all, the Naturals, the anti-matter army with a thirst for revenge on the LMB, continue to hunt for Legion World. In addition, the constant migrations to Legion World create a new problem, as over-population becomes a real issue, something that was previously un-thought. Using the abundance of people to first fill out the need for farmers and everyday workers to give Legion World a solid infrastructure, Nightcrawler and the founders are able to create a solid self-sufficient economy on Legion World. However, the population problem continues, especially the influx of young males. It is Princess Crujectra who suggests that these young males could be good to good work by forming a Legion World Army, since the majority of the LMB were too busy creating Legion World to deal with their enemies. Eryk Davis Ester, the deputy leader is chosen to lead the army, and Faraway Lad, longtime LMBer and former army officer himself, is chosen to be his second in command, to help train the army. Princess Crujectra once more uses her funds to fund the equipping of the army. Note- the more in depth story to this is covered in “This Historical Origins of the Legion World Triumvirate”.
Everybody Comes to SHAKES Quickly becoming a prominent member of the community, Semi-Transparent Fellow opens up the most famous establishment in Legion World history, SHAKES. Known as the best bar in the cosmos, he was inspired by his friends Vararlent and Lash Lad to proceed in doing so, and used his knowledge of bar etiquette to bring a touch of class to SHAKES that has never been matched. Most famously adorned with the triple marine varnished authentic antique swinging saloon doors, SHAKES quickly became a very popular spot. Over the first few weeks of its existence, it would gather a small group of regulars that would become famous mainstays at SHAKES, often tightly muscled super-heroes. SHAKES most famous patron, Outdoor Miner would soon make famous the “three-fer special”, and amaze other SHAKES patrons with his ability to consume mass amounts of alcohol and maintain his famous wit. Varalent a close friend of Semi’s and later lover, would become co-owner of the establishment soon after.
The Starfield Lounge Danny Blaine, also looking to keep the party atmosphere vibrant on Legion World, opens his Starfield Lounge adjacent to SHAKES (which can be entered by a special door), and quickly welcomes all to the “Official Party Place on Legion World” note – the Starfield Lounge would later be known as ‘The Beacon’, although the first 30-40 pages were known as Danny Blaine's 'Starfield Lounge'.
- Some prominent posters from the Early Days of Legion World exit for a time and become focused on their day to day lives outside of the public sphere, such as Caleb, Rokk Steady and Lone Wolf Londo.
- Lash Lad establishes the The Top 5 Posters Club, an elite club on Legion World for the five most active citizens in public life. This club became and remains a part of Legion World life, and the five LMBers who hold those positions often garner respect from others (and vice versa, many do not offer any respect for this largely symbolic position).
- New Kid, a young man named Abin Quank, journeys to Legion World after overhearing a lecture given by Leap Year Lass. He quickly becomes a part of the community and joins the LMB with his powers of super-annoyance. (Note- this is the posters known today as Abin Quank, and how his powers, name and alt IDs evolved will be chronicled when those times arrive on the timeline).
- Sonnie Bloke, an active and prominent LMBer, invites his good friend Harbinger to come to Legion World and join the LMB. She does so, and impresses the LMB so much that they admit her immediately. The effectiveness of Harbinger and the big welcome she receives gives Sonnie the idea to invite his brother Numf-El the next time he contacts him.
Varalent's Varaible Villa Varalent, now officially back in the LMB, quickly becomes a prominent member of the community. He begins construction of his Variable Villa, one of the most prized pieces of land on Legion World, which expands to Varalent’s wishes, and encompasses some of the finest views of the city (as well as numerous beautiful architecture that cause many to try and stay at this establishment). In later months, as the Villa’s (and Varalent’s public persona in government forums) prestige would grow, Varalent and his Villa would often be linked to that of an old Roman Senator.
-Portfolio Boy begins tabulating “the Top 40 Posters” to keep track of the activity of Legion World’s most active public servants, which were all LMBers.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term Part IV: Mega Explosion of Alt IDs
Real History
A few months into the start of Legion World, the old alt IDs of LMBers and members of the DC Board community began to register, as people began to fall comfortably back in old roles without experiencing the hindrance of having no control over the board. Soon, a large amount of alt IDs registered on Legion World, many older ones revisited (i.e. Umber, Mekt Ranzz, etc.).
Soon after, even more alt IDs began registering. This number continued to increase, until it became apparent that there was a virtual explosion of alt IDs. This became so rampant, and such a major influx, that Nightcrawler had to actively ban the use of further alt IDs without special permission, out of fear that this could do damage to the board itself.
The presence of alt IDs was felt enormously on the Mission Monitor Board in particular. Soon, Alt IDs, with fully developed personalities of their own became a mainstay on the MMB and became embroiled in LMB continuity, interacting with various LMBers and each other. Further, many of these alt IDs, in fact the majority, were not ‘new’ members of the community looking to join the LMB, but were in fact antagonists to the community itself, looking to cause trouble and create friction (although this was transparently blatant and totally in jest, obvious to everyone—in other words, this was not an issue). The Alt IDs became so many, that it was hard for some posters to keep track of what was going on.
Although this would die down considerably, Alt IDs have maintained a strong presence on LW and as part of the LMB universe since this period and in the MMB section of LW in particular. It cannot be stressed, however, how potent this was at the time.
In Continuity:
This will be covered in the next section, where a full list of alt IDs that participated during this period will be given.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term Part V: Anecdotes and Adventures during Princess Crujectra’s Term (Part II)
“Conspiracies on Legion World!”
- Eryk Davis Ester brings his cat, Jinx, to Legion World, where she is openly welcomed to the community by various LMBers, like Arachne, Varalent and Fat Cramer, who acts as a mentor to all incoming feline immigrants.
- The Alt IDs, long missing from the LMB, make their journey to Legion World. Umber & the Boyz, Homecoming Queen, Raging Bull, Mekt Ranzz, Mighty Quinn M., Rody the Super Rat, Bucky the Super Beaver, the (3) Triads and other old LMB alts join the community on Legion World. While many elect to spend time regaining some semblance of a personnel life, Umber and Homecoming Queen become active members of the team again.
- Kid Prime, who is joined by Looks that Kill Lad, gives a lecture on the history of transformers and automated mechanics. This proves so popular, that Kid Prime incorporates this as a major part of “Kid Prime’s Room”.
- Many mysterious travelers begin coming to Legion World, which raises the question if there should be some sort of screening process to allow this, or even an office to make sure Legion World is secure.
- Tarik the Mute ventures to Legion World, accompanied by his Android. At first, their presence raises some eyebrows, but nothing comes of it.
- Semi-Transparent Fellow and Varalent begin a relationship on Legion World. Icefyre and Italian Boy also appear to have one, although it appears to be much more open to go along with the legendary flirting ways of both.
- A woman named Evil Queen enters Legion World, and appears to have ill intentions. Other beings, such as a being named Computo also enter.
- The Emerald Empress journeys to Legion World, causing alarms to be raised once again by the LMB, who have heard of her evil reputation for quite a bit. However, she appears to have gone strait, although suspicions are still raised against her.
- Eryk Davis Ester and his army begin fighting back across the universe, conquering Barbarian hordes and liberating lands. At the same time, Cobalt Kid, unknown to the LMB, escapes his imprisonment and murders Dark Conan and the Pious One. Over the next few weeks, he assembles his rag-tag army, which also wanders through the universe conquering barbarian peoples and growing in size. Note- for the full story on both of these, see the Onevisions “The Tale of Dr. Albert Hoffman” and “The Historical Origins of the Legion World Triumvirate”
- Tarik the Mute’s Android becomes more active in public. He announces that his master has opened up a school on Legion World and invites LMBers and LWers to attend the fall semester.
- Icefyre and Semi-Transparent Fellow learn secretly that they are brothers. Semi also discovers that he has an as of yet unrevealed second super-power.
- Mystery Lad sets up his laboratory on Legion World, which most famously has solved mysteries throughout the cosmos. It is once more dubbed "Calling the Roll", which Lightning Lad sponsors the creation of.
- The presence of Tarik, his android, Computo, Evil Queen and Emerald Empress continue to unnerve the community of the Capital City, and some begin to wonder if a conspiracy is afoot. New Kid, sensing that they may need help, writes to his brother Space Ranger to join him on Legion World as a liaison with the Science Police.
- Tarik the Mute and his Android open up their school and to everyone’s surprise have a major number of students enroll. Most shocking of all is some LMBers suddenly enroll in the school as well: Icefyre, who takes the moniker Frostfyre, Fat Cramer, who suddenly becomes Dark Cramer, Super Lad Kid, who becomes Ultra Lad Kid and Blockade Boy. Immediately a city-wide panic ensues and the LMB are left wondering what to do.
- Using the connection between magic and having a 'name', Iron Rat, who is more commonly acknowledged as Stu on Legion World (his traditional moniker among friends), also takes on the alias' PQR and VWX.
- The Emerald Empress offers her help, but is largely rejected because of suspicions. Princess Crujectra speaks to her in private and the two come to an understanding—where the Princess believes the Empress is genuine.
- Ultra Matt and Princess Crujectra’s long-standing admiration for one another is publicly acknowledged as Princess Crujectra adds the title “with Ultra Powers” to the end of her name for a period of time, in honor of her attractive consort.
- Lash Lad strangely undergoes a transformation, and is turned into an android. Android Lash then goes on to his normal business, only to become completely consumed with stalking and then killing Matt Damon.
- Danny Blaine mysteriously disappears from Legion World, only to have his placed swapped with Mantis (who unknowingly is transported from Earth-3). Mantis and Danny Blaine soon learn that they cannot be in the same world at once, and constantly switch back and forth. Further, Mantis becomes aware of a great evil approaching Legion World and begins giving warnings about it. This only increases the feelings of conspiracy and suspicion around Legion World.
The Legion World Triumvirate Throughout all of this, the danger of the Naturals grows ever closer, and a further panic begins to set in on the LMB. Eryk Davis Ester and Faraway Lad, who had beaten a large number of Barbarian Hordes, are called back to Legion World to prepare for the battle with the Naturals, which seems to be destined to failure. At the same time, the army of Cobalt Kid, who is not in the right state of mind after terrible torture and having to commit murder, stumbles across the old LMB Outpost, where Crusader and Maxx find him. They help him regain his senses and send him on his way to Legion World, as he learns his friends still live. The Naturals finally enter Legion World space and attack as Eryk Davis Ester’s army defends it. When things look bleak, they are suddenly joined by a second army, the army of Cobalt Kid, who are only loyal to the famous LMB hero (and not any one planet). Cobalt Kid and Eryk Davis Ester meet for the first time, and in a show of allegiance, exchange second in commands (from this point on called ‘Primus Pilus’ aka ‘First Spear’), as Eryk Davis Ester receives Martyrious and Cobalt Kid receives his old friend Faraway Lad. After a brutal stand at the battle of Thermopolyae, a third army of Starhavenites, led by Grey Birdboy who sought them out and rallied them together, helps give the LMBers the edge, as the finally finish off and decimate the Naturals leaving no man standing. The Naturals are finally defeated, and Cobalt Kid is reunited with his old friends. After Martyrious’ selfless suicide in a show of allegiance to Eryk Davis Ester (in the style of Cobalt Kid’s army), the three armies now pay homage exclusively to the three generals, who then become the Legion World Triumvirate. As the armies march on to conquer the rest of the Barbarian Tribes, the three Triumvirs and Faraway Lad return to Legion World to unite Cobalt Kid with his old allies.
- The Triumvirs return and Cobalt Kid is reunited with his long-lost LMB family. However, he is quickly told by Android Lash and Princess Crujectra that his long lost love and wife, Space Tart, has died. He goes into a quick depression and disappears.
- Eryk Davis Ester becomes aware of the Tarik the Mute’s academy and worries that he is attempting to subvert a large portion of Legion World and the LMB. With Dark Cramer, Icefyre, Ultra Lad Kid and Blockade Boy as examples of this, he orders (as Deputy Leader) that Tarik the Mute’s academy be investigated.
- Winema Wazzo arrives on Legion World, and suddenly announces her candidacy as Legion World/LMB leader, which is not for many months away. She wastes no time in declaring that Eryk Davis Ester and Princess Crujectra are fascists, and calls EDE’s trouble with Tarik a ‘witch hunt’ and the business of Crujectra taking Ultra Matt’s name as blatant bigamy. She starts a campaign against them.
- Some LWers and LMBers become alarmed by this, and many unfamiliar with the leaders almost give these charges some thought. Princess Crujectra and Eryk Davis Ester immediately fight back.
- Out of fear that Computo, Tarik the Mute’s Android and Android Lash may lead to more robot trouble on Legion World, Sanity or Madness? has Circuit Breaker, a unit bent on destroying robots, sent to Legion World as a back-up plan.
- New Kid’s summons to his brother finally pay off and Space Ranger enters Legion World, with the intentions of clearing up the various conspiracies there. At first, he is greeted by many who are relieved. However, his rough around the edges attitude and black and white outlook turn some LMBers off, who fear his style of policing my not jive with Civil Liberties. Most outspoken of all against him are Semi-Transparent Fellow, Varalent and Arachne. Space Ranger, ever determined to do his duty, ignores this completely at first.
- Android Lash is able to revert to his normal self, although in doing so, the cure consisted of several gender-reversal germs. Unexpectedly, he is changed back into a human, but into a female. Thus, Lash Lass retakes her place among the LMB.
- Giant Robotic Lesbian first appears on Legion World, and makes it apparent that she has no patience for men. Many fear her strength.
-Following GRL, Anti-Lad appears on the scene, seeming to have an outright hate for all males.
-Princess Crujectra visits Cobalt Kid’s chambers to snap him out of the funk he is in. She realizes that what he really needs is something to do, something to take his mind off of Space Tart and his still recent torture. Realizing that his greatest skills have always been super-heroing, she discusses with him the need for increased security on Legion World, in light of the recent influx of strange characters.
- Dark Cramer, disappointed with the poetry at Tarik the Mute’s academy, quickly drops out and resumes her moniker as Fat Cramer. Blockade Boy soon follows suit. Many LMBers are relieved and the two rejoin their ranks.
-Space Ranger has a run-in with the Emerald Empress, who is insistent to create a harem on Legion World. His suspicions of her create a tension between the two. The Empress focuses on starting a harem with Lash as her harem master, overseeing Icefyre, Danny Blaine, Italian Boy, Varalent, Kid Prime, Icefyre, Nightcrawler, Eryk Davis Ester and others. Not so strangely, many of them do not mind all being together in a harem.
- Mantis’ cryptic warnings continue to worry many. Semi and Vee, seeing her so stressed, offer her a change to work as a bar maid at SHAKES, a job she once had before.
- Kara journeys to Legion World after experiencing her own intense loss. She quietly joins the others at first.
- At this point, the Royal Inquisitor entered Legion World, although he remained in the shadows for some time.
- Space Ranger announces to Legion World that he has direct evidence that Winema Wazzo is a fake, and is in fact, not the real Winema. She denies this vehemently, although she slowly begins decreasing her activity in the public eye.
- Poverty Lad, after receiving a hefty some of money from a few choice investments, takes on the new moniker of “Low-Middle Income Lad” for a brief period.
- Lash Lass spends an evening flirting with her old friend Sketch Lad, although these strange new attractions leave both LMBers confused. While Sketch Lad returns to his family, Lash Lass deals with her new female hormones.
- While on Legion World, Stu takes on the form of a puppy, instead of his traditional human form. The reasoning behind this is that when transformed, mages are able to channel magical energy far easier. Also, it is believed the lovable reaction of many to puppies may have had some effect on this decision.
- Space Ranger gives Jinx a universal translator, which allows Jinx to speak 'human' from time to time.
- Probes sent out by Nightcrawler into the surrounding universes are fond on Taltar. Taltar elects their honored Ambassador Thora to venture to Legion World.
[ March 07, 2006, 06:24 AM: Message edited by: Cobalt Kid ]
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term Part VI: Anecdotes and Adventures during Princess Crujectra’s Term (Part III)
“Boiling Points and Thora of Taltar!”
One Crazy Night at SHAKES With a plethora of activity occurring across Legion World, and various conspiracies reaching their boiling points, the tension continues to mount on Legion World to the point where it appears as if it will explode. The first semblance of that explosion occurs on one Friday night, mainly occurring at SHAKES. Here is a brief synopsis of what occurred note- these events occurred one crazy Friday night on Legion World here on page 22 of SHAKES I although these events crossed into other threads, which progressed the various stories going on there quite a bit :
Frostfyre, confused by his recent time at Tarik the Mute’s Academy, travels through the city streets of Legion World. Suddenly and without reason, he is attacked by Evil Queen, whose violence almost kills him!
Frostfyre, whose senses have now been slightly knocked back to what they should have, immediately searches out his brother, Semi-Transparent Fellow at SHAKES.
At this exact time, Space Ranger enters SHAKES for the first time to questions Mantis on her warnings. As of this point, he and Semi-Transparent Fellow are not on friendly terms. He begins questioning her, and she refuses to answer, not trusting him completely. He becomes frustrated.
Also at this exact moment, Princess Crujectra discusses with Cobalt Kid the idea that he might be in charge of some of the Security on Legion World, in an attempt to give him something to do that he is good at to break him out of his depression. He appears to like the idea, and takes it under consideration, venturing out into the streets of Legion World for the first time.
Frostfyre barges into SHAKES looking for Semi, only to find Space Ranger and Mantis. Space Ranger immediately begins questioning him, threatening to arrest him for being a student of Tarik’s and for fighting on Legion World. Mantis disappears to find Semi.
Semi enters SHAKES in a frenzy, threatening Space Ranger to leave the premises. Space Ranger, worried of a conspiracy between Tarik, Winema Wazzo, Evil Queen and others, refuses.
Superboymjjr watches from his ship and wonders if he should enter.
Cobalt Kid, on patrol on Legion World for the first time, enters SHAKES and steps right into the middle of the confusion between Semi, Frostfyre and Space Ranger. Attempting to figure things out, they are able to make things a little calmer.
The Emerald Empress enters SHAKES and sees Space Ranger harassing Semi and Frostfyre. Feeling protective of Semi, one of the few LMBers to believe in her, she immediately attacks Space Ranger. Space Ranger responds by attacking back, and he accidentally destroys the authentic triple marine varnished saloon doors of SHAKES.
Cobalt Kid and Semi are able to break the fight up, but not before hard-feelings are left lingering between the combatants, and the feelings of conspiracy have only increased. Space Ranger leaves, with unfinished business between he and Semi, and Cobalt Kid meets the various LWers for the first time. He and Kara enjoy a drink.
Frostfyre’s memories are returned throughout this trauma and he suddenly regains his composure with the help of Semi-Transparent Fellow and Outdoor Miner. He becomes Icefyre once more with the help of his brother and drops out of Tarik’s academy to rejoin the LMB!
- New Kid, feeling as if he is no longer new on Legion World, takes on the new moniker “Almost New Kid”. He is subsequently referred to as ANK by Varalent, which is picked up by other LMBers.
- Lash Lass meets back up with an energized Cobalt Kid, whose depression seems to have faded after the recent high energy events. The two actually flirt a little, although the physical attraction between the two seems to confuse them and seem unnatural, since Cobalt has often taken the role of “Lash’s little brother” in the past.
- Following the events of the night at SHAKES, tension continues to mount between Space Ranger and certain members of the LMB and Legion World. Semi-Transparent Fellow, Varalent, Icefyre, Mantis, Kara and Arachne are just some who are unsure of Space Ranger’s intentions.
- Lash Lass goes on a major shopping spree with Umber and Homecoming Queen.
- Tarik the Mute’s Android remains a public figure, despite the large drop off in academy students. Mantis, who had previous affections for androids before, attempts to seek him out.
- Princess Crujectra has a secret meeting with Cobalt Kid and discusses the need for an Office of Security on Legion World. She officially makes him “Chief of Security” and makes it a position for life, so that he would not have to worry about the constraints of politics. Nightcrawler gives his approval of this nomination (thus, cementing its place among Legion World bureaucracy) and donates a building for Cobalt Kid to work out of.
- Lash Lass, sick of dealing with female hormones undergoes a special procedure to be returned to his normal state. Unfortunately, the side-effects change him back to a man, but increase his age to over 80 years old. He takes on the new moniker, Peepshaw Lash.
- Thora of Taltar arrives on Legion World. Immediately, she is disgusted by what she sees as a patriarchal society, because the men are not enslaved. She call the Legion World women to join her in enslaving all males. Harbinger, Arachne, Fat Cramer and Princess Crujectra immediately decline. While Leap Year Lass does consider it, Giant Robotic Lesbian and Anti-Lad seem very interested.
- Peepshaw Lash is finally able to revert himself back to his old self, and becomes Lash Lad once more.
Invasion from Taltar! With tensions mounting across Legion World, Thora’s invasion of Legion World finally began, as she struck at a time when Legion World was still not at full strength – many LMBers were busy constructing the city and getting their lives together, and an air of distrust had surfaced due to the conspiracy theories! Thora’s attack led to the following events (note- Once more, one crazy night on Legion World caused the following things to happen in succession. This time, the effects were long-lasting on LMB continuity and many personnel story-lines for LMBers!):
Thora launches her initial attacks on the streets of Legion World. Anti-Lad and Giant Robotic Lesbian immediately join her.
Lower Middle Income Lad (aka Poverty Lad) utters his famous quote: “Oh No! The Girls are Revolting!”
Kid Prime and Lash Lad, fearing what may happen to their genitalia, hide out in Kid Prime’s room.
Cobalt Kid emerges from the chaos as Chief of Security and announces the opening of the Office of Security (original office). He immediately begins fighting back against Thora.
Space Ranger, at that exact moment, begins his counter-attack, defending the freedom of the citizens of Legion World.
Seeing the exact similarities between their missions, Cobalt Kid and Space Ranger fight side by side against the forces of Thora.
Ultra Lad Kid, while walking through the streets of Legion World, is suddenly attacked by Giant Robotic Lesbian and Anti-Lad. Calling to Tarik the Mute and his fellow academy students to help, he receives none.
A united front makes its stand against Thora: Semi-Transparent Fellow, Mantis, Kara, Varalent, Arachne, Icefyre, Emerald Empress and Outdoor Miner fight back.
Cobalt Kid sees Ultra Lad Kid being attacked and is able to defend him against Giant Robotic Lesbian and Anti-Lad. He tells him that he will save him, and then pardon him if he swears off his allegiance to Tarik the Mute’s academy and rejoins the side of good. Ultra Lad Kid agrees and becomes Super Lad Kid once more.
The forces of Thora begin getting pushed back by the united heroes, who are all now fighting side by side. Cobalt Kid confronts Thora herself and offers to make peace with her inside his new Office of Security.
Cobalt Kid brings Thora into his office and the two discuss peace settlements. Eventually, a different understanding takes place and Cobalt Kid locks his door so that he and Thora can take out their aggression in another way. Afterwards, a satisfied Thora calls off the attacks.
Cobalt Kid announces the creation of the Office of Security. He offers Space Ranger a job as Deputy Chief of Security, since his mission is so similar to Cobalt’s and they fought so well together. Space Ranger excepts and joins, as well as becomes a member of the LMB. Cobalt then offers a place in the Office of Security to Super Lad Kid, which is a part of the terms of the pardon, so he can repay his debt to society. Super Lad Kid accepts and the three begin the new Office of Security.
During this night, Kid Prime announces that he is taking a brief absence from the LMB and Legion World, for personnel reasons. He promises he will return.
The various heroes venture to SHAKES to end the night on a drink together. At this point, Semi-Transparent Fellow takes Space Ranger to the side to discuss their differences. The two, mutually impressed by each other’s passion for justice and freedom, decide to put aside their differences and work together—and more, become friends. Space Ranger is officially welcomed by the Legion World community.
Impressed with their willingness to help, the LMBers present induct Emerald Empress, Mantis and Kara into the LMB. Semi and Vee vouch for the Emerald Empress, and Cobalt and Space Ranger take them at their word and give the Empress a chance. After even further consideration, they make the Emerald Empress the fourth member of the Office of Security.
The heroes spend a night of drinking in each other’s company after these events, and toast to Kid Prime.
- Around this time, a few LMBers become less active, including Italian Boy and Superboymjjr.
The Return of Shark Lad Shark Lad returns to the LMB in a big way! After migrating to Legion World sometime earlier, Shark Lad waited for awhile to be sure that his old evil feelings would not resurface. Confident with himself, although always harboring fears of going evil again, the mighty LMBer returns to the fold and immerses himself among the new LMB community on Legion World.
- In light of the recent battle against Thora, Mantis and Space Ranger begin spending quality time together. Space Ranger’s known marriage to his twin Carrggite wives prevents him from making moves in the public eye, although they share some nights together behind the scenes.
- With Super Lad Kid rejoining the side of good, Tarik the Mute’s Academy loses its last major recruit among the LMB. From this point forward, Tarik the Mute and his Android begin to decrease their presence on Legion World.
- The Office of Security establishes a rigid entrance examination to Legion World to stop any further malcontents who wish to harm the LMB from entering. Although not anywhere close to violating civil rights, these check points help to keep Legion World secure from the likes of beings like the Royal Inquisitor and Evil Queen.
- Kara and Cobalt Kid date for a brief while during this period.
- Princess Crujectra continues to have many suitors, including the Boy with Ultra Powers, Nightcrawler, Cobalt Kid and the newly returned Shark Lad.
- Flirting in general continues to be a very strong force on Legion World. The Emerald Empress becomes very close to both Space Ranger and Cobalt Kid, her new undercover partners in the Office of Security.
- StuRat becomes a regular at SHAKES, and is often found huddled behind the bar at the end of the night. A photograph of the drunken puppy famously makes the rounds of the local media circuits.
- As Danny Blaine and Mantis continue to switch back and forth, Semi-Transparent Fellow and Varalent do their best to watch over the Starfield Lounge. Kara takes on a job as a bouncer there, as Icefyre spends many nights dancing, and Shark Lad spends quality time in the pool.
- Icefyre and Shark Lad begin dating on and off.
- Nightcrawler opens the “Trophy Room” on Legion World, which also has a ‘secret trophy room’ attached to it, known only to a select few. Inside this room, Nightcrawler reveals many of the deepest secrets of Legion World.
- Mantis continues to issue her warnings about an oncoming evil, explaining that Thora, Evil Queen and Tarik were not the evil she had foreseen, and that it will be much worse.
- Harbinger has a few amusing exchanges with Space Ranger and Almost New Kid, beginning what has become an ongoing tradition on Legion World.
The Return of Dev-Em Dev-Em returns to the LMB, as he ventures to Legion World. Quickly, he learns the LMB have disappeared, while he is greeted by what appears to be Space Tart. Soon after, they are joined by Computer, who has the personalities of Lash Lad, Lucien Lad and Dolly Parton. After a battle with Madrox the Multiple Durlan (who is first introduced here), and joined by the Amazing Cans (an all-female super team from Xanthu), they venture to Earth to find that the Retros are forcing the LMB boy band to reunite. The Entropy Spinach attacks, causing the Retros to bow out and Lucien Lad to go evil. Soon after, LardLad, Eryk Davis Ester, Shark Lad all are turned evil too. Space Tart is revealed to really be the LMB Spectre, returned once more, by a trick of the Time Mouse Trapper. A second Space Tart appears as Space Hawk Tart Avatar, but is soon revealed to be the Avatar Beast, appearing for the first time, as it can take the shape of various animal avatars. Various LMBers are used to turn the other evil LMBers good again, while Lucien Lad and Kyle Minogue team up. The main enemy is eventually revealed as LMBer Beagle Boy…and then, truly revealed to be, Piddlin’ Pup!! At the end, Dev-Em and the LMB Spectre return to the LMB and join them on Legion World. Beagle Boy is restored and Lucien Lad appears to be good again. Piddlin’ Pup is sent to major super-pet therapy. Note- this story was actually written a little later and is an actual tag thread. It takes place now, because it was retelling events that happened before hand. Thus, this is the second appearance of the Avatar Beast, but the first in chronology.
- Dev-Em rejoins the LMB on Legion World, and uses his first moniker, “Dev-Em”. It appears that he has regained his Daxamite powers, in addition to his Durlan powers.
- The LMB Spectre joins her comrades on Legion World, but takes on the status of ‘reserve member’. She opens up the Hall of Fallen Heroes, which acts as a monument to the LMBers who have died. Statues adorn this hall.
- The idea for this narrative comes about by a suggestion from Lash Lad. Cobalt Kid takes this idea to heart and begins his research for the “History of the LMB” at this time.
- Thora reemerges on Legion World and announces to the general public that she is pregnant with Cobalt Kid’s child. She informs them that she intends to raise the child as a man-hating femi-nazi if born a girl, and as a slave in the pits of Taltar if a boy. She then demands that Cobalt Kid marry her, or she promises to capture him and force him into a servitude of marriage if need be. Quickly, this becomes the new focus of Crisis on Legion World.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term Part VII: Even More Anecdotes and Adventures During Princess Crujectra’s Term (Part IV)
- Thora’s declaration that she will be forcing Cobalt Kid into marriage sends the LMB into a frenzy. Prepartions begin getting made. Some prepare to attack, such as Arachne, Eryk Davis Ester, Varalent and others, while some, such as Fat Cramer, prepare to plan the wedding just in case the LMB lose.
- Now that Dev-Em was firmly planted among the LMB again, he sends for his old friend, Furball, to rejoin the LMB as well.
- Shark Lad joins the Office of Security, as he also begins looking for an occupation on Legion World.
- Another Alt ID, Nardo, comes to Legion World, where he hosts a radio show for a brief period of time. He has many listeners who are loyal and dedicated, and equally as many who loathe him.
-Furball arrives and immediately, he and Shark Lad resume their animosity for one another from three years ago. This time, a whole new set of LMBers (Semi, Varalent, Icefyre, Almost New Kid, Sonnie, Harbinger, etc.) try to break them up.
- Lash Lad publicly laments for introducing Cobalt Kid to Princess No-Protection all those many years before, which resulted in his distaste for protection. Once more, Cobalt’s libido has gotten them into trouble.
- Space Ranger appears missing for a few days. Almost New Kid, Emerald Empress and Mantis alert Cobalt Kid, his partner, to this. Immediately a search begins. The words “Males are Cretins” is found spray-painted on his quarters. It is surmised that Thora has kidnapped him.
- Cobalt Kid announces that he is ‘Calling All LMBers’ to fight against Thora. Volunteers immediately sign up.
The Assault on Thora The history records remain slightly vague during this time, because the hallucinogenic inducements that would later haunt the Dark Stu Saga were released on the LMB at this time as a test for that later crisis. Therefore, the LMB did go through much of what they believed, but much of it was not happening in reality. The following is what this historian believes occurred: Note- this was an actual tag team thread called “The Assault on Thora”, and was the first new one to begin on Legion World. Some of the details, however, have been retroactively fixed, as some posters did not want their characters so involved in the story. Here is the retconned version of events:
The LMB arrive by space cruiser to Taltar, looking to diplomatically speak to Thora. Their objectives are: to free Space Ranger, to save Cobalt’s child so it won’t be raised to be a femi-nazi or slave, and to stop Thora from marrying Cobalt Kid.
Immediately, they are attacked by an army of femi-nazi’s. Many LMBers strike out against them in space, including Icefyre, Danny Blaine, Kara, Harbinger, Lash Lad, Dev-Em, Lucien Lad and others.
Shark Lad and Furball also join them, but immediately begin battling each other.
Princess Crujectra stays on board with Almost New Kid, whose powers of super-annoyance are of little use.
Semi-Transparent Fellow and Varalent act as the Espionage Squad and break into Taltar to free Space Ranger.
Cobalt Kid and Eryk Davis Ester disguise themselves as nurses to see where Thora is. They find Thora is surrounded by a royal guard, including a female doctor named Doctor Lesbon.
Outdoor Miner and Arachne enter Taltar through their own means and journey to the slave pits. They then recognize that they must free the slaves there.
At home, Super Lad Kid patrols Legion World. Suddenly, he is attacked by Evil Queen! She is supposedly joined by Winema Wazzo, Tarik the Mute and Tarik’s Android, as well as a mysterious fifth person. The Emerald Empress, Fat Cramer, Grey Birdboy, Lower Middle Income Lad and Iron Rat.
Space Ranger appears to Semi and Varalent, but is under the control of Thora, due to the Golden Dildo of Taltar! The powerful Daxamite soon attacks his fellow LMBers.
Thora appears to go into labor (this is later revealed to be untrue). What is actually happening is Dr. Lesbon is casting an illusion that Thora is in labor. Eryk Davis Ester and Cobalt Kid, dressed as nurses, help the illusion Thora give birth with Dr. Lesbon, when it is actually Dr. Lesbon herself that has given birth. Crazy enough, the child to come out is the Avatar Beast, which takes on the form of animal avatars. It soon takes on the form of a Shark Lad/Furball combination and heads into space to attack the LMB and the femi-nazis.
Femizons attack Eryk Davis Ester and Cobalt Kid, until they are suddenly saved by a major surprise: LardLad! LardLad, dressed as a femi-zon (and using the reasoning that there are plenty of fat chicks on Taltar with beards and dicks), saves EDE and Cobalt and rescues them. However, it remains a mystery if Thora was ever on Taltar at this time to begin with.
Arachne and Outdoor Miner, through ingenious use of combining their powers, are able to free all the male slaves.
Semi and Varalent are able to free Space Ranger from the clutches of the Golden Dildo of Taltar. They then rejoin Arachne and Outdoor Miner, Eryk Davis Ester, Cobalt Kid and LardLad and teleport to the ship. Dr. Lesbon, who still appears to be a doctor, is enamored with EDE and Lardy teleports her too by accident.
On Earth, the LMB go to rescue Super Lad Kid, and battle the villains there. Tarik the Mute, his android and Winema Wazzo are captured, but all appear to actually be hallucinations. Evil Queen, however, is very real, and she prepares to kill Super Lad Kid. The Emerald Empress, with no other option, uses the Emerald Eye to vanquish her on the spot, and kills her. The fifth member remains a mystery.
The LMBers in space battle the Avatar Beast and defeat it again, unsure of what it is. With the illusions lifted, neither the femi-nazis nor the LMB are sure of what’s real anymore and agree to an easy truce.
The LMB return home, wit Dr. Lesbon in toe. Later, a secret investigation led by Cobalt Kid and Semi-Transparent Fellow reveal that Dr. Lesbon was behind the whole operation, working for an illusion casting villain, who was the mysterious fifth member on Legion World. They would not know until the very end of the Dark Stu Saga, who this villain truly was (re: the main villain behind the Dark Stu Saga).
LardLad rejoins his friends, although tragedy has now struck. The Emerald Empress, after committing murder, demands to be put on trial for regicide. Dr. Lesbon does not make it Earth, fearing that she would be found out.
- Upon returning home, the LMB learn that Evil Queen is dead and the Emerald Empress wishes to be tried for regicide. The LMB find her not guilty for reasons of self-defense, but the Empress still wishes to be tried by another royal, Princess Crujectra, for killing a royal (Evil Queen). Cobalt Kid places her into his custody per her wishes.
- Tarik the Mute and his Android, are not seen for some time after this (as of this narrative, they have not been seen since). Winema Wazzo is also not seen for a time.
- The Royal Inquisitor makes his presence known to the LMB for the first time. He posts a note on the door of Princess Crujectra’s Headquarters, announcing the start of his ‘Inquisition’. He says that he finds the Emerald Empress guilty, and that he plans to execute her for her crimes.
The Trial of the Emerald Empress The Trial of the Emerald Empress finally comes, and a major show of support from the LMB comes out for her—and for the first time in her life, she feels accepted. Various LMBers, ranging from Varalent, Semi, Space Ranger, Harbinger, Cobalt Kid, Icefyre and a variety of others tell the Royal Inquisitor to back off. The Inquisitor replies by charging all of them in his inquisition and swears revenge. However, he makes no move at this time, although he is placed on the Office of Security’s Wanted List. Princess Crujectra finally deliberates and finds the Empress ‘not guilty’.
- Quislet, Esq. opens up his “Super Law Firm...of Space!” in response to being asked a variety of questions on the law. This becomes a popular and frequently visited establishment on Legion World.
- Kid Prime returns to Legion World toward the end of Princess Crujectra and Eryk Davis Ester’s term.
Ms. Grundy visits SHAKES Legion World gets a strange visitor when Ms. Grundy visits SHAKES one night. Strange things happen as the night progresses, including Pastor Uptight N. joining her and many LMBers suddenly becoming much more conservative and resentful to civil liberties. Soon, Icefyre is planning on marrying Umber, Cobalt Kid and Eryk Davis Ester lead a Gestapo-inspired Security office, and other LMBers all are very unlike themselves. Only certain LMBers, such as Space Ranger, Kid Prime, Faraway Lad and Grey Birdboy are able to fight this, and they soon act as a resistance under Princess Crujectra’s orders. Finally, the LMBers gather at Hi-Risk Von Tingle’s mansion after the wedding of Icefyre and Umber is halted, where Paster Uptight N., Princess Cru’Power, who may be related to the Jectra family, Jamie and Jessie Quickly two horrible twins with super-speed, Lex Herosbane and Emma Grundy all waited for them. After the LMBers battled each other, the distorted LMBers are returned to their normal selves, although all of the LMB soon feel the wrath of Lana and Lex Herosbane, who used their power to remind them of their greatest fear! Only Space Ranger is able to overcome this, as he breaks free and leads the LMB into the final battle! Learning their enemies were agents of Botoxalips, home of Evilseid, the true master of long-believed dead LMB foes Biegeseid and Plaidseid, the LMB take the fight to Botoxalips, calling in every available active and reserve LMBer.. Note- this was an actual LMB tag thread entitled “Ms. Grundy Visits SHAKES”.
- Stu sponsors a “BeatlesTour of Legion World”, as the famous group is brought from the past to invade the super-hero planet.
- Anti-Lad and Giant Robotic Lesbian, still both on Legion World, have a crazy night on the town. Although not getting too out of hand, they do create quite a bit of chaos.
- Doctor Mayavale enters Legion World and sets up shop. He often tells of the various times he’s been betrayed in his other lives—often times by LMBers in their other lives!
- Thora settles on Legion World permanently. She remains hostile to Cobalt Kid, although there are times when the two appear to enjoy each other’s company. Some LMBers remain on hostile terms with her (i.e. Arachne, Princess Crujectra, etc.), although some come to know her better (i.e. Fat Cramer). She gives birth to a baby girl named Umber, for the color of her eyes.
- Lower Middle Income Lad changes his name back to Poverty Lad.
- The denizens of Legion World, impressed by the conduct of the Office of Security and enamored with the legend of the poster known as Cobalt Kid, erect a giant statue in his honor. As the first Legion World Statue, The Statue of the Legendary Poster Known as Cobalt Kid becomes infamous. The name of the street it is on (parallel to Embassy Row) is changed to Statue Way.
- Almost New Kid takes on the job of Official Legion World Janitor. This thankless job incorporates a variety of things and actually gives Abin an ironic bit of power.
- Almost immediately, Almost New Kid (aka Abin Quank), Sanity or Madness? (now known as Reboot) and Poverty Lad begin tampering with the Statue of Cobalt Kid. The Emerald Empress, the LMB Spectre and a host of others continually restore it for him. At one point, a giant statue of a bidet is erected in downtown Legion World.
- Giant Squid, an Alt ID reporter, makes his way to Legion World and becomes a major media figure. He covers all of the major LMB and Legion World events through his broadcasts.
- Almost New Kid takes on the new moniker “Almost But not Quite New Kid”.
- “Calamity” the official Legion World band forms at the Royal Psyonion Embassy. Some members include Outdoor Miner, Eryk Davis Ester, Icefyre, Cobalt Kid and others.
- Homecoming Queen, spending the majority of time shopping and looking for boys, becomes less active with the LMB.
- In light of the negative reaction to the LMB Enquirer’s shameless news printing, the Emerald Empress creates her own newspaper, “Eye on Legion World” to give a different viewpoint of various news events.
- Juan, who had been involved on and off with the LMB, becomes a full-fledged Doctor, specializing in single-celled amoebas. Taking the moniker Doctor One, he officially joins the LMB, and becomes their resident scientist specialist. Amusing enough, the LMBers seem to go to him for all problems even slightly related to going to a doctor of any kind. Thus, Doctor One joins the LMB!
- Thora sends her baby to Taltar to undergo traditional treatment for infants. While there, a scientific experiment goes wrong and an interdimensional vortex opens up. Baby Umber is sent backwards into the past fifteen years and across space into another dimension. The residue left behind strangely echoes the same residue noted both two years earlier and fifteen years earlier. Both Thora and Cobalt Kid are devastated. This further distances Thora from the rest of Legion World.
Return to Earth After months of being away from Earth since the Corporate takeover, the LMB considers organizing a small espionage force to journey there and see what has been happening there. A meeting consisting of Eryk Davis Ester, Icefyre, Cobalt Kid, Shark Lad, Nightcrawler, Varalent, Space Ranger and Lash Lad is held, and it is decided that Lash Lad will remain on Monitor Duty, while the rest return to Earth. However, the monotony of the Corporate Earth is able to best many of the LMB, causing the mission to be a failure. Fortunately, a more thorough attempt by Blockade Boy, Icefyre, Space Ranger, Jim Gallagher, Eryk Davis Ester, Iron Rat and Nightcrawler succeed. Leap Year Lass and Rhino also join them, and the two are able to set up a special means of transport between places that later becomes accessible to Eryk Davis Ester and Lash Lad.
[ August 06, 2008, 02:21 PM: Message edited by: Cobalt Kid ]
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term Part VIII: The Ongoing LMB Tag Team Thread
Real History
Tag Team threads have always been a long-standing tradition in the art of LMB storytelling, and one can argue helped launch the idea of a fictional LMB in the first place. As the years have come and gone, however, there have been periods that have seen immense tag team activity, and then period where there was virtually none. During Year Two (in continuity) there was very strong period of tag team stories, although that was never matched in subsequent years. During Year four, the long tag team threads, such as “Hot Summer Nights” and “Doom of the Super-Heroes” brought tag team threads back, although they were not as frequent.
Once on Legion World, tag team threads came back in a big way, in the Bits O’ Legionnaire Forum, which was created for things exactly of this nature. Soon, the tag team stories followed, after “Super Jailhouse of Space” was finally completed (although in a rather confusing way). The tag team stories to follow were: “The Fight Against Thora”, “The Return of Dev-Em” and “Ms. Grundy Visits SHAKES”, all of which were active at this time.
After these, Cobalt Kid launched another tag team thread “The Ongoing LMB Tag Team Thread”, with the same idea, but this time to switch it up, there would be no ending. Soon after, the thread exploded, and exploded, and then…exploded some more. The pages began piling on top of one another, and quite suddenly, the thread was up to 30 pages long!!
To back up for a second—this thread lasted for the latter two thirds of Princess Crujectra’s term and well beyond, in Stu’s term as leader. However, for the purposes of this section here and now, the parts during Princess Crujectra’s term will be covered. The latter half of the tag thread will be covered in the next section during Stu’s term.
The Ongoing LMB Tag Thread was absolutely bursting with ideas, with about six to seven amazing ones per page—and at 30 plus pages! Eventually, it would become too big that it would hinder the story-telling, but that is for the next section. For right now, we will analyze the effects it had on continuity.
Murder Mysterious Nads-Kicker Lad, a wannabe who wished he could be like Nads-Kicker Lass and Penis Eradicator Lad appears mysterious murdered on Legion World (his severed head that is). This turns out to be the work of Madrox the Multiple Durlan, who attacks Cobalt Kid, Shark Lad and Super Lad Kid! A being known as John A. Misnomer appears, along with the Morality League of Qward, who demand Hummer Lass and Captain Lightlbulb, who is visiting the LMB. Both are revealed to be Brood agents in disguise who attack! John A. Misnomer, after getting soaked by Danny Blaine and Space Ranger’s piss becomes the hated enemy Brood-shit, while another Brood Officer, Petty Officer Marvin of the Brood , turns on his brethren and helps the LMB in the name of good. He is quickly inducted as an Honorary Member of the LMB.
Star 69 Dev-Em and Kara, on a mission in space, encounter Vaginimus, who was on a tear through the universe to capture the Emerald Dildo of Ekron. However, Dev-Em uses his knowledge of the LMB Archives to draw them both to the Golden Dildo of Taltar, which crashes head-long into the Emerald Dildo! Combined together, the two erupt into the beautiful Star 69, where it is believed the Emerald Dildo Fairy has joined them and taken on a life essence there. Vaginimus, moved by this beautiful spectacle, decides to move peacefully throughout the universe.
The Church of the Great Orgasm Vaginimus is interrupted, however, as ‘The One from M81” crash-lands into her, causing an eruption of cosmic orgasm. Various members of the cosmos feel this suddenly, and become consumed with the desire to reach that state once more. They band together and become the Church of the Great Orgasm. This same exact moment causes the Brood attack to flounder.
Sonnie Bloke’s Super-BrotherNumf-El, the brother of Sonnie and old friend of Harbinger, realizes that the LMB are severely stretched thin these days. He joins his two comrades and is quickly inducted to the LMB on the merits of his humor alone.
Whoredru, Ruler of Legion World! Sonnie, Numf-El, Harbinger, Fat Cramer. Varalent, Blockade Boy and others are suddenly attacked by the combined annoying attacks of Bagpipes Boy and the 2 Lori Mornings! These attacks appear to only be a preview of a deeper attack, as Whoredru once more appears and attacks Legion World!
The Cumming of Climactus! Throughout this craziness, Antiquated Forms of Communication Lass appears and tells them of a warning, although Eryk Davis Ester is able to see through this, and recognize her as an imposter! Climactus attacks Legion World, reigning secretion on them, until the arrival of Something Amazing, who is able to defeat the monster through means that are really something amazing! Something Amazing is quickly inducted as an Honorary Member of the LMB.
Ongoing LMBP Adventures Magazine Capitalizing on the interest in LMB adventures, the “Ongoing LMBP Adventures Magazine” is launched. The staff there includes Eddie Tor , Editor; Trixie the extremely flexible Pixie /Gal Friday; Deirdre Harlow, The secretary's secretary; Dolly the Sheep; Roger Moore; Samantha Fox.
The Youngest LMBerInvisible Brainiac joins the LMB, after impressing them with his wits, intelligence, raw power and sheer enthusiasm. A certifiable genius, his power at first appears to work in that he gains his genius when he is invisible. However, this is not the true nature of his powers, which he keeps secret at first.
The LMB Green Lantern Numf-El comes face to face with Almost But Not Quite New Kid, who the LMBers had been referring to as ABNQNK for short, and laughs at the moniker. Dubbing him Abin Quank, which is actually quite close to his real name, they rejoin the battle, but only after Abin decides to take on the name Abin Quank as his heroic LMB moniker. Cobalt Kid, seeing Abin’s use of super-annoyance as a limited power, issues him a genuine Green Lantern ring that he had secured on his various security missions. Thus, Abin Quank emerges as the Green Lantern of the LMB!
An Onslaught of Enemies Things continue to move toward a climax, as a variety of LMB villains launch an attack under the orders of the main villainess. Madrox the Multiple Durlan, Turns You Into A Country Fred, Slaughter Hawk, Bloodbath and Avangelyne (the last three new villains), Fat Albert & the Gang and the Church of the Great Orgasm attack, but a united LMB (virtually every member at this time) fight back, along with Petty Officer Marvin of the Brood, Something Amazing and Captain Lightbulb. New members Numf-El and Invisible Brainiac, along with Abin Quank, Green Lantern, shine. Only the main villainess was left.
Tragedies Revisited The main thread behind the attacks of Madrox the Multiple Durlan, the Church of the Great Orgasm and Climactus is revealed! As the LMBers take some much needed tea and biscuits time on their ranch, LardLad is led astray by Hummer Lass, who offers him actual sex, to his surprise! As he goes for it, he learns that this is actually Mordra the Harlot, one of the greatest LMB tragedies, back again after all these years! She quickly steals the Lardforce power from him, and then precedes to the do the same to all the other male LMBers (gay and strait) through the same method of vaginal sex! Finally, they are able to rally around the female LMBers who defeat her and restore all their powers, but only after it becomes apparent that LardLad has lost his full connection to the Lardforce!
The Great Cogaaaad Saga Part I “The Consortium of Giant Ants Attempting to Achieve Dominance”, a group of giant ants doing just that, launch an attack on the world! Dusty Baker, an old honorary LMBer, unites 13 various LMBers from all over to attack them, becoming “the Baker’s Dozen”. Towards the end, Dusty Baker and Rody the Super-Rat are transported backwards into the past by the Time Mouse Trapper, who appears! Note- this bit of the tag thread can actually be seen in “Great Cogaaad Saga” in a ‘breaking up the LMB Tag Thread’ production
The Great Cogaaad Saga Part II The Time Mouse Trapper unleashes his attack, by transporting the Cogaaaad under a red sun, where they all gain the power of a Kryptonian! They launch their attack on the universe, as honorary LMBer P’ym H’nry, also known as Ant-Man, a giant ant who could shrink to the size of an ant, discovers a way to beat them. He beams this information directly into the brain of Outdoor Miner, who is drunk at SHAKES, although he is then killed by the murderous crew. He dies valiantly for the LMB. A united LMB attacks the Cogaaad in space, as a few others prepare for a more secret mission.
The Great Cogaaad Saga Part III With the united LMB battling the Cogaaad in space, Kid Prime joins the Light Brigade for a suicide mission into Ant Man’s laboratory to blast the red sun into a yellow one. The charge in, dubbing the mission “The Charge of the Light Brigade” and succeed. Meanwhile, a smaller team consisting of Lash Lad, Iron Rat, Poverty Lad, Cobalt Kid, Icefyre, Outdoor Miner, Homecoming Queen, Marvin of the Brood and Super Lad Kid attack the Time Mouse Trapper on his home ground at the end of time. After a vicious battle, the Time Mouse Trapper is finally revealed to be Lash Lad from an alternate universe where he actually kept the retcon powers! Suddenly the LMB Spectre arrives and uses her power to rip the mouse apart from the man, splitting the power in two. Super Lad Kid uses his smell replicating power to make the mouse search for cheese, which it does, traveling through time. The beaten Trapper, with no longer any powers, is left at the end of time finally defeated for good, after all the evil he has done to the LMB.
Mysteries and Back Stories The One Called the One reemerges for a brief period of time, interested in Eryk Davis Ester, LardLad, Pornis, Lucifer Lass and Leap Year Lass once more. Lucifer Lass kills time-traveler H.G. Wells, who intended to help the LMB look for Rody the Super Rat and Dusty Baker.
Wart World and Uranus The planet Pluto, actually a mad God of the old universe, begins to attacks Uranus along with the Robot-Cans. Only the LMB are able to stop it, as it begins to make its way to Legion World. Doctor One and Invisible Brainiac come with a device to destroy it. A previous battle with the JSMBP (which we know little about yet) caused Pluto to be trapped in the first place. During this battle, a young woman named Everyday Girl, who is haunted by two ghosts that the LMB believe don’t exist, helps against the evil enemies. Everyday Girl is inducted as an Honorary Member to the LMB!
Golden Girl The Mangler attacks the LMB, as Golden Girl, a mysterious girl with links to the LMB’s past, appears. Strangely enough, Numf-El reveals to Cobalt Kid that he is Numf’s father, as Numf-El has been sent back in time—and then, quite suddenly, he reveals that Golden Girl is his mother! After a strange but amusing interlude with Golden Girl during the Wart World Saga (which included Golden Girl inseminating herself with Cobalt Kid's semen in front of Numf-El), Numf-El and Harbinger decide to go to Scotland to learn the origins of his birth.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term Part IX: The Election of Stu and He Who Wanders
Real History
Princess Crujectra and Eryk Davis Ester’s terms came to an end at a time were the activity among the LMB was at an all time high. The sheer number of things going on was amazingly immense, and Legion World’s Mission Monitor Board almost could not contain it.
Thus, when the next election came, facilitated by Crujectra, the activity was particularly immense. Once more, one of the largest turnouts ever for an election was made and people enjoyed the entire process, getting involved in every way they can. A more in depth nomination period preceded the actual elections and then a large campaigning period, in the tradition of the first elections, followed suit. Various threads endorsing the candidates arose, including the return of the LMB Enquirer, which once more printed various lies and false but very funny, stories about them.
At the end of the election, Stu was elected leader of the LMB for the third time, and He Who Wanders and Princess Crujectra were elected as the deputy leaders. Princess Crujectra opted to forego another term, and He Who Wanders became the sole deputy.
The Final Nominees were:
Kid Prime Varalent Princess Crujectra He Who Wanders Stu
In Continuity
The LMB elections once more came into play as Princess Crujectra and Eryk Davis Ester’s terms came to an end. Princess Crujectra oversaw the nomination period, which was more in depth this time around, as more LMBers became actively involved in the elections. Once more, the LMB Enquirer, which had followed the LMB to Legion World, continued to produce scandalous lies and half-truths about the LMBers running for office (and occasionally, some that were not).
For a period of time, it looked like the front-running candidate for LMB leader may have been Fat Cramer, or it at least appeared that way through her campaign manager, Lash Lad. However, a brief name change return to Dark Cramer and what looked to be a possible team-up with Mekt Ranzz, a villainous Legion Worlder with a flare for etiquette, made many question this. This was all rendered moot when Dark Cramer dropped out of the race in the final days before the last round of nominees were picked. She then returned to the moniker Fat Cramer.
At the end of the elections, Iron Rat and He Who Wanders were elected leader and deputy leader, after Princess Crujectra declined her election to deputy leader.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
| IP: Logged |
posted
Year Five: Princess Crujectra’s Term Part X: The LMB at the End of Princess Crujectra’s Term
Here is the active LMB roster at roughly the exact time that Princess Crujectra’s term as leader came to an end:
Princess Crujectra (Leader) Eryk Davis Ester (Deputy Leader) Lash Lad LardLad Cobalt Kid Mystery Lad Grey Birdboy Rhino Sketch Lad Dev-Em Looks that Kill Lad Lucien Lad Shark Lad Faraway Lad Furball Iron Rat (aka Stu) The Boy with Ultra Powers Poverty Lad Umber (& the Boyz) Leap Year Lass (aka Thriftshop Debutante) Kid Prime Quislet, Esq. Varalent Fat Cramer Nightcrawler Matlock Minesurfer He Who Wanders Lightning Lad Saturn Girl Sanity or Madness? Outdoor Miner Arachne Sonnie Rickshaw DrakeB3001 Tromium Crystal White Raven Star Boy Awkward Pause Boy Bubble Wrap Boy Portfolio Boy Danny Blaine Blockade Boy Super Lad Kid Semi-Transparent Fellow Icefyre Abin Quank (aka Almost New Kid, New Kid) Harbinger Space Ranger Emerald Empress Mantis Kara Numf-El Invisible Brainiac Doctor One (aka Juan)
LMB Reservists** Crusader Maxx LMB Spectre Kid Gender Reversal Stereotype II Something Amazing Marvin of the Brood Everyday Girl
**By the end of Princess Crujectra's term, the LMB Reserves had officially been reinstated, and were filled by both traditional reservists and other, newer allies.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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Year Five: StuRat’s Term Part I: High Energy and Growth
In the final weeks of 2003, Stu and He Who Wanders began their terms as LMB leaders, as the high energy and traffic on Legion World continued to be non-stop. Throughout this term, the revitalized community of Legion World, now undoubtedly one solid community, continued to immerse themselves in a variety of fun and madness on their new home. New Friendships continued to be forged and old ones became even stronger.
There was a continued effort on the part of many to search out old friends and get them to journey to Legion World. Old LMBers and members of the DCMBs slowly but surely registered and other newer members joined up for the first time, quickly becoming part of the constantly evolving community.
It must be said outright that there has never benn, and most likely will never be, a time when the membership becomes more firm than it is flowing. With that in mind, it can be said that by the time Stu became leader of the LMB once more, this trend had somewhat begun in a minor degree, so that the long-time players on Legion World became somewhat established, and Legion World itself, although still new and fresh, had begun many of its own traditions and customs.
The continually fun and craziness raged on throughout the next three months and the LMB, in terms of continuity and storylines, blazed forward with a plethora of ideas, never stopping once for anyone to catch its breath. This finally culminated in the final weeks of Stu’s term in what is called “The Dark Stu Saga”, a period that is looked with great nostalgia by many. Incredibly unique, the Dark Stu Saga encompassed a wide range of people, stories and silliness on the Mission Monitor Board, and set the stage for what future role-playing storylines would be like. It was a highly energized fun ride that created an even higher level of energy on the MMB, when it appeared that things might actually be slowing down.
In a way, Stu’s term can be seen as the final part of the pre-adolescent days of an early Legion World, in that by the end of it, a very firm grasp of what Legion World meant to everyone was held by most. Further, by the end of Stu’s term the website had been up and running for three quarters of a year and it was clear that it was not going to be going anywhere any time soon. People who had traditionally not been a part of the same circles were interacting on more continual basis and doing so on a variety of topics.
What had begun in the months before became more concrete during Stu’s term, as people really became embroiled in the fun that could be had.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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Year Five: StuRat’s Term Part II: Life on Legion World
Activity on forums has increased and decreased, events have happened and natural thread ideas and topics have peaked at certain points and become more prominent at others. Like Princess Crujectra’s term before it, Stu’s term as leader saw the beginning of many of its own trends throughout the various forums on Legion World, many of which continue to this day. Here are a variety of things that were occurring during this period of LMB history:
The Mission Monitor Board Establishments Throughout Stu’s term, another trend became prominent on the Mission Monitor Board, that of the creation of a variety of establishments on Legion World. Where previously some threads were more centered on being someone’s ‘room’, these threads were often types of establishments that served food or performed some service to its customers, and were used that way in the day to day role-playing aspect of LMB life and continuity on the Mission Monitor Board. Joining SHAKES, Café Cramer, choclatte , the former Danny B’s Starfield Lounge restructured as the Beacon and others furthered this trend. Although some threads previously existed, such as Kid Prime’s Room, Vee’s Variable Villa and Cobalt’s Security Office, this was a period in which these types of threads really exploded, and it was very common to see half of page one of the MMB occupied with them. These threads soon became very large and exist to this day. each thread will be covered individually in the Anecdotes section
The Dark Stu Saga The Culmination in Stu’s Term arrived in the form of “The Dark Stu Saga”, which will receive further attention later in this narrative in its own section. What is remarkable about this trend in relation to this chapter is the all-encompassing aspect of this event, in both terms of people and in threads. For at least five or six weeks, which was an enormous amount of time, this storyline progressed across the MMB, filtering in and out of a variety of older threads, as well as a plethora of newer ones. A large amount of different posters became embroiled in it, including many new ones, many who never involved themselves in such a thing, and many who had not posted a lot in recent months and were now reemerging. This ‘saga’ was so prevalent, that it showed a tremendous amount of activity each and every single day, as opposed to later similar events/sagas that would often be marked by minor periods of activity in their duration. The Dark Stu Saga also showed the uses of the board in full effect, as avatars, names, signatures and other things were used to highlight the changes occurring in relation to it.
Legion Forum Legionology Begun by Superboymddjr, these threads became a weekly event for a period during Stu’s term as leader, as they focused on an individual or team's characteristic traits and how it possess such uniqueness to the Legion Lore. There were a variety of them during this period that included many Legion Worlders weighing in there opinions.
The Trophy Room From the onset, the Trophy Room had seen little activity, as well as caused some minor computer hack problems for Legion World. During a period where Nightcrawler wished to restructure the board, he decided to discontinue the forum and add the small amount of threads there to other forums accordingly.
Visionaries of Tomorrow As Nightcrawler continued to consolidate and restructure the various forums on Legion World, he created the Visionaries of Tomorrow forum. Previously, there had been a few different forums for various creators, such as Dave Cockrum and Steve Lightle, in which they were the moderators. However, with an abundance of Legion creators venturing over to Legion World to interact with us, it became too complicated to give each creator their own forum, therefore prompting Nightcrawler to create the Visionaries forum to house all of the creators.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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Year Five: StuRat’s Term Part III: The Ongoing LMB Tag Team Thread
Real History: The Ongoing Tag Team Thread began during Princess Crujectra’s term as leader, and it became a staple in the Bits of Legionnaire Business Forum, and the main source of all things LMB in regards to tag threads and Onevisions. After Princess Crujectra’s term came to an end, the Ongoing Tag Team thread continued well into Stu’s term.
From there, the thread continued on with a variety of stories and ideas, lasting well through Stu’s term, before finally beginning to fizzle out towards the end of it. It lasted well into thirty pages with a plethora of ideas, events and characterizations occurring. In the subsequent months, many attempts to resurrect the thread have been tried, although it’s never quite caught as much activity again.
Towards the end of its lifespan, the Ongoing Tag Team thread took on a different type of style, as it became more of the product of mainly four main writers, Numf-El, Invisible Brainiac, Abin Quank (and his various alt IDs) and Cobalt Kid, although others pitched in from time to time. It was because of its massive size (over twenty pages) that people began finding it too overwhelming to join in. Further, the stories became more and more separate and were similar to a series of Onevisions occurring at roughly the same time. Despite all this, many of the most brilliant bits occur during this period.
The JSMBP Rody the Super Rat and Dusty Baker, sent back in time to the 1950’s, find themselves face to face with the Justice Society of Message Board Posters (the JSMBP), whose roster includes: Super Duper Marvelous Man, Spectacular Aqua Lungs Lass, the Green Latrine, and Jesse Quickly. Rody and Dusty also confirm that Jesse Quickly is indeed the mother of the time-lost twins and enemies of the LMBP, the Quicklys (who battled them in “Ms. Grundy Visits SHAKES”). Further, JSMBP allies Duck Bloggers and his sidekick Cloned Green Pig join them. Immediately, a misunderstanding occurs and Dusty and Rody find themselves at odds with the JSMBP! Note- this brilliant work of Abin Quank is truly more of a Onevision than an aspect of the tag team thread
Road Trip to Aberdeen: the Origin of Numf-El In light of recent events, Numf-El, accompanied by Harbinger, journeys to Aberdeen, Scotland, and a variety of other places to uncover his origins. After a series of crazy antics, including some with Roger Moore, Samantha Fox, Trixie of the LMBP Adventures Magazine and Dolly the Sheep, Trixie invites these allies to join her as the news team of LMBP Adventures Magazine. After further adventures with Captain James T. Kirk and Darth Vader, he eventually learns the truth: he is the product of a clone Supergirl created by Darkseid who went mad after 14,000 years (Golden Girl) and a large series of heroic and great figures. They include about 6,000 different fathers that exist throughout space/time/multiverse outside of such things as continuity, such as Atilla the Hun, Jesse James, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Alexander the Great, and according to Darkseid, the greatest of hero them all, Cobalt Kid, whom Darkseid tells him has yet to fulfill his potential. After learning his origins, Numf is shocked to learn that Harbinger would prefer to stay with Darkseid, rather than return, and Numf-El returns alone to the LMBP. Note- this brilliant work of Numf-El is truly more of a Onevision than an aspect of the tag team thread
Pagan Lass and Stoopid Cat After the misunderstanding is worked out, the JSMBP and Rody and Dusty consult their Ouija board and discover the madness of Pluto aka Wartworld! However, they are soon interrupted by the entrance of Pagan Lass and Stoopid Cat, further visitors from the 31st century, to the others surprise. Immediately, Stoopid Cat wants to attack Rody, but is stopped by Green Cloned Pig. Further, Dusty Baker learns that Pagan Lass is actually the wife of LMBer Abin Quank, and Stoopid Cat is the long lost brother of Fat Cramer! this is actually a Onevision written by Abin Quank
Mean Old Hero Tired of seeing these wipper-snappers goof off so much, old time do-gooder Mean Old Hero ventured to Legion World for a day, and suddenly made every LMBers genitalia fall off! Soon though, this was revealed to be a trick by Mean Old Hero, who was really an illusionist, as a way to teach them the lesson of humility.
The Great Intellect Some dangerous intellect begins summoning all parts of the Emerald Body of Ekron toward it to gather a dangerous force, as a plethora of LMBers are drawn into the mix. Soon, every member of the LMB is involved, including long lost honorary member Santa Claus. We also learn a few interesting facts about Santa Claus, including his real name is Nick Fountaine, former secret agent for the British Empire during the French Revolution, he is a gay man, he is a magic-user on par with the Sorcerer Supreme, is a practitioner of pagan witchcraft who actually secretly celebrates the birthday of Mithras, the Persian deity, which is on the same day, he is immortal and ages very slowly., Ms. Claus is actually Santa's adopted daughter, is a HOTTIE!, Santa is fat for a reason, because in his civilization, being overweight makes you sexy! Whenever Santa beefs up for the holidays, he knows that when he gets back home he's going to look like a bonafide sex-pot!, Nick believes in the legalization of marijuana and is known for smoking a few doobies here and there, and Santa is wanted in parts of the galaxy for murdering the War-Monger king of the dreaded Evil Empire.
The Rainbow Man of Ekron Dancing Queen returns with her new pal Booty Shaker, both bent on helping the Great Intellect, as they force Semi, Varalent, the Emerald Empress and Shark Lad to undergo synchronized swimming! Meanwhile, Marvin of the Brood and Santa Claus discover the true horror of the Great Intellect: he is brining back the body parts of Ekron to give himself immense power in the form of: the Rainbow Man of Ekron! In addition, swarms of Loony Tunes characters swept across the universe, and shockingly left Petty Officer Marvin of the Brood in a new state: as Marvin the Martian (of the Brood)!
The Origin of Stoopid Cat After a clash between Stoopid Cat and Rody the Super Rat, we learn that Stoopid Cat received his power from a clash with StuRat sometime in his past—which resulted in a lasting enmity between the two of them. Further, we learn that StuRat has taken a long list of forms (7412 in fact) during his time as a sorcerer, beginning way back as StuGerbil in Ancient Egypt under the tutelage Numb-Nuts the Semi-Incomprehensible. Further, we learn that Bast, the Pre-Egyptian Goddess of Cats empowered Stoopid Cat to act as a balance to his cosmic twin, StuRat, to one day stop a terrible invasion of the galaxy. Bast then used her subtle manipulations of the universe to ensure that Pagan Lass (born centuries later) and Stoopid Cat found one another, as Pagan Lass was the third prophesized savior in this struggle. this is actually a Onevision written by Abin Quank
Galactic War and Rainbows As the Rainbow Man of Ekron summoned his power to him, his agents Slaughterhawk, Avenglyne and Bloodbath joined Elmer Fudd, who betrays his new friends the LMB and takes on the name Death Blood, forming the “Badly named 1990’s Villains”! The LMB suddenly rush to battle them in space unknowingly leaving Legion World unguarded, as the Rainbow Man of Ekron attacks! Suddenly, every single LMBer, reservist, honorary member and inactive member are called into action for the big finale!
Pre-Egypt and the JSMBP The mystery of the connections between some LMBers and Pre-Egypt deepens, as StuRat senses Stoopid Cat and Pagan Lass’ absence in the current timeline (and the untrue notion that the Rainbow Man of Ekron may have been his dreaded enemy) lead him to travel back in time! Joining him was Nightcrawler! this is actually mostly a Onevision written by Abin Quank
Letting off Steam in SHAKES following the non-stop stream of recent events, the LMB converged on SHAKES, where an unexpected ‘show’ took place, as Harbinger poured flaming cherry brande down her toes into Cobalt Kid’s mouth, to the delight of Space Ranger and Abin Quank! Things began to get wildly out of control from there, as Poverty Lad pronounced his love for Jinx and others began acting crazy. Unfortunately, all woke up the next day with no memory of this night, and are unsure if it was a dream…
Showdown in JSMBP HQ! StuRat and Nightcrawler arrive, joining Rody the Super Rat and Dusty Baker, and suddenly, the battle with the JSMBP erupts! The JSMBP are joined by another of their member, Mr. Terrifically and his T-spheres Ben and Wa! And then, in the midst of the madness, the battle between Stoopid Cat and StuRat begins! This rages on, until finally…Bast appears! Bast then tells Stoopid Cat, StuRat and Pagan Lass about the oncoming threat, and with her magic, sends Dusty to Shameless Hussies with his friends, Rody the Super Rat to join Numf-El on his upcoming journey, and the JSMBP back to their home in the 1950’s, leaving the three mystical members and Nightcrawler. this is actually mostly a Onevision written by Abin Quank
Shameless Hussies the infamous other hangout of the LMB on Legion World gets spotlighted, as Numf-El, Cobalt Kid, Abin Quank and Invisible Brainiac meet two suspicious trailer park hussies, Trailer Trash Barbie and Party Time Skipper. Pagan Lass, who enjoys some time on stage, then convinces Numf-El and Abin Quank to do their own 'dance' on stage, as Dusty Baker suddenly appears! this is actually mostly a Onevision written by Pagan Lass
Zombies, Kung-Fu and the girl named Kaant Numf-El decides to swear off the seven deadly sins and learn kung-fu and spirituality in the Andes Mountains (really so he can learn to kick some ass). Embarking on this journey, he is joined by Kaant, an Asian girl with a dirty mouth and a hard-ass personality, and 247 Panamanian Zombies that follow Numf wherever he goes, Rody the Super Rat, Homecoming Queen and other assorted crazy people!. this is actually a Onevision written by Numf-El
Here are some other anecdotes to note following these stories: - Everyday Girl, Dusty Baker, Bugs Bunny, Santa Claus and Something Amazing returned to their homes, maintaining their honorary membership. - Invisible Brainiac battled his enemy Truant Officer Ralph for a time. - Pagan Lass and Stoopid Cat returned to the 31st Century and became official memberes of the LMBP! - Harbinger gave Cobalt Kid a massive wallop of a punch after he got fresh once too often! - Lightning Lad, Saturn Girl and Nightcrawler officially notify the LMB that they now plan on leaving Legion World and going on space-missions (where they previously felt confined because of their duties as founders). - Harbinger and Fat Cramer discuss all things LMB over some tea! - Salad Tosser Lord breaks Cobalt Kid up into Cobalt Id, Cobalt Ego and Cobalt Super-Ego, until LardLad and Eryk Davis Ester free him!
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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Year Five: StuRat’s Term Part IV: The All New, Not-so-Different, LMBP Tag Team Thread
Real History
Toward the middle of Stu’s term as leader, the Ongoing LMBP Tag Team thread began to die out, as mainly four authors continued to post on it. In an attempt to bring more people back into the craziness and fun of tag team posting, a new Tag Team thread was started, entitled ‘The All New, Not so Different, LMBP Tag Team Thread’. This thread lasted for a few weeks during Stu’s term, and became another very large thread that incorporated a wide array of storylines and subplots, as well as brought in a wide range of posters. Typical of LMBP tag team threads, however, it began to die out at one point, and never had an official ending.
In Continuity
It was a sunny day at the Hootchie Hut when Houston, a girl working there, awoke from a dream with a scream—although at the same time Prince Lordain was having a dream of Houston having that dream—and even more, at the same time, a Giant Cactus picking his nose was having a dream of Prince Lordain having a dream about Houston having the same dream—and at the same time again, EDE was having a dream about the Giant Cactus picking his nose having a dream about Prince Lordain having a dream about Houston having the same dream!
He gets out of bed after being weary of such a weird dream and ventures to Café Cramer, where he encounters LMB antagonist Nads-Kicker Lass. She tells him Penis Eradicator Lad, her kissing cousin, has been kidnapped by Pornis! This was strange because theoretically Penis-Eradicator Lad could destroy Pornis with one blast of his powers, considering Pornis was a giant penis. However, before EDE could ask more questions, Nads-Kicker Lass begins hitting on him (which is of course dangerous for any male), but Lash and Poverty Lad interrupt to tell him Vaginimus is attacking Legion World with an army of tiny house spiders.
While Nightcrawler, Emerald Empress and LardLad fight back Vaginimus and the spiders, they learn that they are actually coming to seek refuge from, oddly enough, the armies of Legion World!
On Legion World, Cobalt Kid entered the Café looking for Eryk to find Nads-Kicker Lass flirting with him even more. Realizing that the only other Triumvir that could be using a Legion World army was Greybird, he rushed over to the Aviary to find Grey Birdboy unconscious! Joined by Stoopid Cat and Jinx, they attempted to rouse him.
At the Café, Fat Cramer had Nads-Kicker Lass teach her a few moves when Creepy Jerk Kid entered the Café and began hitting on Nads-Kicker, taking her away from EDE, who had tried to call Lightning Lad for female advice. Creepy Jerk Kid got dirty with Nads-Kicker, and while everyone waiting for the big pay-off, she shocked them by giving him a passionate kiss!
At the Hootchie Hut, a bi-beer spiked Varalent noticed the pole-dancer named Houston and found himself oddly attracted to her. Unknown to them, the giant Cactus had traveled to Prince Lordain and the two were en route to join them right then.
In orbit around Legion World, as Nightcrawler attempted to figure out what to do with the spiders and Vaginimus, the Emerald Empress made a shocking announcement to LardLad that she was pregnant.
Meanwhile on Venus, a young boy looked at the sky and saw a large rift opening. He had a note that told the whereabouts of Kid Prime that might or might not be with a toked out Lori Morning. Lori, however, apparently had used the H-Dial to become…Nads Kicker Lass?!
Further, another enemy saw an opportune time to let loose his ‘Puppy Dogs of War!’
On Legion World, Beagle Boy races to the Aviary and saves Cobalt Kid, Jinx, Stoopid Cat and Grey Birdboy from a sudden attack by a mystery assailant in a truck. Cobalt Kid uses his magnetism to rip out the assailant…
At the Hootchie Hut, Varalent is taken into the champagne room, where Invisible Brainiac, secretly at the Hut, pays Houston to give him the works. This is interrupted as Semi bursts into the Hut and demands she cut the shenanigans and tell them about the dream. Before she can, however, the Hootchie Hut is attacked by Giant Robotic Lesbian and Anti-Lad, looking for Cobalt Kid to kick his ass for lacing GRL’s drink with Bi-beer earlier that week! A frenzy breaks out, just as Prince Lordain and the giant Cactus arrive…
Meanwhile at the Café, Fat Cramer sees how distressed Eryk is because of Creepy Jerk Kid making time with Nads Kicker Lass, and so she delivers her own brutal kick to his nads! As he falls out of the story, a furious Nads Kicker is calmed down by EDE, who tells her he’ll help her find her cousin…
EDE, Nads Kicker and FC immediately grab Outdoor Miner and teleport to the Hootchie Hut, thinking Lardy might be there, although they are suddenly immersed in the huge fight going on there! After a melee, Eryk and Miner teleport back to Legion World, leaving everyone else at the Hootchie Hut, just in time to see Cobalt Kid rip out Ambiguous Kid, however, they were soon interrupted by the Titty Twins, Lactation Lass and Tits McGill! Outdoor Miner then teleports the Titty Twins and EDE *back* to the Hootchie Hut into the middle of the madness! There, however, GRL and Anti-Lad had decided Cobalt Kid was not there and stormed off.
In this story, LardLad reveals the origins of the Titty Twins, and their relation to HUGEMANBREASTS, Globe Girl and Space Tart, which was previously added into this narrative.
At this exact time, Emerald Empress reveals the father of her child—who is actually a mother! You see, it was a gender-reversed Nads Kicker Lass!
Elsewhere at the Hootchie Hut, Invisible Brainiac was in combat with his enemy, the cutie known as Spelling Bee! At first the LMBers planned to stop her lusty intentions towards the young LMBer, but stopped when they realized she only wanted to neck. In the other room, Fat Cramer lectured the Cactus and Prince Lordain about how the Hootchie Hut was not a strip-joint but a place of worship for the sacred dance.
Meanwhile, reality stars Night & Day were fighting, much to the amusement of the LMBers on monitor duty, Homecoming Queen and Kid Psychout.
In orbit, Nightcrawler had figured out that it was Victoria’s Secret World that had pretended to be the Legion World armies to capture Vagnimus, to use the spiders that lived with her to make excellent silk, which would further their economy which was based on the negligee industry. Suddenly, Poverty Lad revealed himself to actually be the impersonator Madrox the Multiple Durlan, who was working for both Pornis and the Victoria’s Secret Empire. Their plan was for Madrox to capture Vaginimus for Pornis and the spiders for the negligee empire! Madrox then began, to well, multiple, only using a chalkboard and his Durlan hands as sharp figure nails, stunning the LMB!
Meanwhile, the real Pov was in a Censory Deprivation Tank, censoring Pov’s use of obscenities! Cobalt Kid, Beagz, Stoopid Cat and Grey Birdboy went to rescue him, after Cobalt got the location from Ambiguous Boy by beating him repeatedly with a telephone book and rubber hose while Stoopid Cat watched to make sure no LMBers saw! As they freed Pov, Pornis revealed himself and attacked the cave, with Penis-Eradicator Lad helping him while under mind-control! However, before they had to resort to using a neutered Stoopid Cat to defend them, Poverty Lad awoke from his dream, which in turn caused the whole lab to explode from the climax of his dream! Pornis and Penis-Eradicator Lad escaped, while Pov was brought to a hospital. They are then joined by Umber and Amber, who strangely were giggling with lipstick on each other’s collars, after some various curious activities. Faraway Lad joined them and sent them to the Hootchie Hut, which of course was inaccurate, as his powers are to send people far away, not to a direct place. About a mile from the Hootchie Hut, they begin trekking there.
However, Faraway Lad and Stoopid Cat reappear, where they are suddenly attacked by the villain who had unleashed the puppies of war—their old enemy Behind You Boy!
With everyone else converging on the Hootchie Hut, an albino midget crashed into the fray, only to be trampled by the Puppy Dogs of War, as simultaneously a meteorite hit the asteroid holding up the Hootchie Hut! As chaos continued, a Super Moby Dick appeared with Captain Ahab of the Eight Dimension, whom the Cactus recognized, as his race had trade relations with the Eight Dimension! Following him was the Communist Super Red Army of Space! Chaos ensued!
The Puppy Dogs of War began to eat the Red Army, which gave them indigestion, while the albino midget fled! And suddenly…the great rift that the young kid saw had stretched across the universe to the Hootchie Hut. The Prince, the Cactus and Houston all explain that they saw this in the dream, where they and Eryk Davis Ester could save the universe, except…
The Emerald Empress suddenly went into premature labor! Suddenly joining them, Winema Wazzo pulls her out of battle, but even worse—she then kidnaps EDE!
Back on Legion World, Pornis has blasted all of the remaining LMBers: Sanity or Madness?, Abin Quank, Poverty Lad, etc., as well as Penis-Eradicator, explaining that he made a deal with the enemy to kidnap and kill Penis-Eradicator Lad so Nads Kicker would then become a man and have an affair with the Emerald Empress, so her baby could then be used to complete the spell that began with the great rift, which would then make everyone in the universe sterile—and thus, end life as we know it! He leaves them all for dead and exits…
…However! Kid Prime, still kidnapped, is revealed to be the prisoner of the One Called the One! The One hates Kippers because of his instrumental role in her defeat in ‘Hot Summer Nights’, but she also hates Pornis more! She sends Lucifer Lass to rescue Penis-Eradicator Lad, which leads her to Legion World, where Lucifer Lass saves the LMB, Legion World and Penis-Eradicator Lad, but destroying Pornis’ evil liquid! She then makes them pledge to allow her to return to Legion World without them hindering her, if she should so choose. They agree, and she takes a select handful of LMBers with Penis-Eradicator Lad to the One Called the One’s Lair.
Meanwhile, the Empress, in labor, is stuck with Winema Wazzo and Eryk, when suddenly Winema, unknowingly duped for her role in this, is knocked out and Behind You Boy stands revealed! The poor Empress, in labor, can do little, as both Eryk Davis Ester and the baby are kidnapped by Behind You Boy! However, this is the mighty Emerald Empress, Sarya of Veneger, and even during labor she will not be trifled with. She uses the Eye to blast Behind You Boy’s ship, although the villain is able to escape with the baby. She does, however, save EDE, and brings him back. Behind You Boy escapes, with the help of Madrox the Multiple Durlan, and the two rush forth to complete their spell.
At the Hootchie Hut, the remaining LMB settle all scores and send all villains packing, as they now search frantically for the Empress and Eryk. They finally find them, although they are unsure what to do. It is then that Lucifer Lass arrives with Penis-Eradicator Lad, the other LMBers and Kid Prime, who the One decided to free in return for a secret promise she had Kid Prime make concerning Lard Lad and Eryk Davis Ester. United, a small team is sent to find the baby, while the others use the Prince, the Cactus, Houston and Eryk, who then soon discover can be substituted by Lucifer Lass and Lard Lad to figure out a way to stop the rift. It is Dr. One and Abin Quank (with his ring), who finally figure out how to reverse the effects.
This only works however, because a small team of Arachne, Varalent, Cobalt Kid and Invisible Brainiac, with Nads Kicker Lass and Penis Eradicator, travel to the secret destination of the enemy: as Faraway Lad uses his power to send a note to the LMB far away, although just close enough to hit Poverty Lad on the noggin, which causes Outdoor Miner to hone in on Far and send the LMB to them (with the Emerald Empress helping). There, the LMBers defeat the Madrox the Multiple Durlan, but are too late—the child is entered into the spell, and grows into a horrible figure of pure energy and lust! No longer a child, it enters the spell…however, the four dreamers are able to hinder its progress back at the Hootchie Hut. Its only when Nads Kicker Lass delivers a horrible kick to her own child, which is now some type of reborn sexual evil deity, that it stops. Not to be outdone, Penis Eradicator Lad turns to Behind You Boy, who masterminded the whole thing…and Eradicates his Penis!
The enemy I stopped and the Sex Deity is sent hurling into the rift, where it is imprisoned. Nads-Kicker Lass and Penis-Eradicator Lad, who up until now had been LMB antagonists, now decide they’d rather be LMB allies. Further, the mystery of the connection between the One Called the One/Pornis/Eryk Davis Ester/LardLad/Lucifer Lass deepens.
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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Year Five: StuRat’s Term Part V: Anecdotes and Adventures During StuRat’s Term
While the majority of tag team adventures took place during the opening weeks of Iron Rat’s term, and the Dark Stu Saga took place during the closing weeks, there was still a plethora of adventures and anecdotes during the intervening period.
Inauguration Iron Rat’s term kicked off with the Inaugural Ball, to celebrate the new leaders of the LMB. This took place at the newly constructed “Stu's Mansion”, which would act as his head quarters, during his time as leader, continuing the tradition of Princess Crujectra, who used her own headquarters during her term. A wide range of LMBers turned up for the night, and it became a very large celebrity event. Giant Squid, a big time media reporter, and almost a celebrity himself now, covered the event in detail.
Stu’s Cabinet Upon his taking office, StuRat carefully fills his cabinet with a variety of able LMBers to assist himself and He Who Wanders throughout their term. Kid Prime, Varalent, and Icefyre all receive high ranking positions, as does Jinx, which is a bold move, considering that felines have traditionally not been a part of government institutions. The Security Office under Cobalt Kid continues its long-standing mutual cooperation with the new government, as Iron Rat recommends (which Cobalt Kid agrees to) that Arachne and Blockade Boy be appointed as Security Officers.
- Quislet, Esq., the well-known Legion World lawyer was appointed as Chief Magistrate by Iron Rat, and acted as the final say on all things litigious.
Café Cramer The growth of the capital city of Legion World continues, as more LMBPers are encouraged to begin opening different types of businesses on Legion World. Like SHAKES before it, Café Cramer is opened to appeal to the ordinary folk of Legion World by offering daily treats, foods and beverages. Fat Cramer, the entrepreneur of this restaurant is quickly recognized as a premier businesswoman and Café Cramer soars in popularity. Soon after, a variety of other restaurants open.
Commerce in Restaurants With SHAKES and Café Cramer proving that a business in foods and drinks is both highly profitable and sorely needed on Legion World, other Legion Worlders begin to open their own restaurants, usually each one finding their own niche, and thereby adding a tremendous amount of diversity. These restaurants begin to take up the open space on Main Street, which intersects with Embassy Row and (the later known) Statue Way, creating what may refer to as “The Food District”. Semi-Transparent Fellow and Fat Cramer, the two entrepreneurs of Legion World’s most popular restaurants, took it upon themselves to revitalize “Danny B’s Starfield Lounge”, renaming it The Beacon, and making it the premier restaurant on Legion World, noted for its class and style. With Danny Blaine, Saturn Girl and help from other LMBers such as Stu and Cobalt Kid, the Beacon quickly opens to raving reviews. Stu and Cobalt Kid, both respectively busy as LMB Leader and Chief of Security, find time for their own venture, opening up choclatte a small café that centers around chocolates and chocolate themed drinks, such as the infamous ‘chocolatte’, which was created by Cobalt Kid by accident. Lash Lad also got into the act, created the much loved “Lash's Weenie Hut”, which catered to the Legion Worlders more primal desires. As months would go by, other restaurants would continue to open and this venue of business continued to expand, as these buildings joined the likes of other business district notables, such as Kid Prime’s Room, Stu’s Mansion, Cobalt’s Security Office and Vee’s Varitable Villa.
- At this point, most of the adventures that take place in “The Ongoing Tag Team Thread” occur, as more weeks move by during StuRat and He Who Wander’s term. By the end of those adventures, Pagan Lass and Stoopid Cat have joined the LMBP.
Curious and Curiouser The long-standing mystery of the connection between LardLad and Eryk Davis Ester is further complicated as Eryk Davis Ester wakes up one morning to find himself stuck in LardLad’s body. Despite many LMBers attempting to figure out what has caused this, they are unable to determine the origins of the problem, which is rendered moot a week later when Eryk Davis Ester returns back to normal.
Old Friends Never Leave Forever T hroughout the creation and migration to Legion World, the LMB maintained a steady program of getting their old friends to join them, despite being scattered throughout the universe. Often, this would cause long-missing friends to turn up, find their home, and then retire from public life and active membership of the LMB again, knowing that the LMBers were satisfied that their friend’s safety was secure. This program exploded early in Stu’s term, as old friends Caleb and Ger returned to the fold briefly, enjoying a warm reception (and the latter being missing for sometime). Kid Therod also returned, as did Galahadran (aka Lurker Lad II), both missing from the LMB for some time as well. Eventually, all four would fit the pattern and retire from public life, but their home on Legion World had been established.
- The Feline community becomes more active on Legion World, as Fat Cramer, Stoopid Cat and Jinx, all three prominent LMBers and Legion Worlders, spend a great deal of effort to combat institutional racism against felines.
- Raging Bull, although an inactive LMBer, spends a few days on Legion World, and enjoys many nice nights at the Beacon in the company of Danny Blaine. Many other LMBers speculate that this could the foundation of a romantic relationship.
- LMBers Mantis and Kara, both alt IDs that had become prominent under Princess Crujectra’s term, decide to retire from public life on Legion World and leave the active roster of the LMB. Mantis takes an opportunity to remind the LMB to be on guard, because the great evil she has been warning them about will still one day arrive. She spends time with Cobalt Kid and Space Ranger to discuss what she can do to help warn them.
The Price of Security A mystery on Legion World begins to unravel, as a small boy named Elagabolus is discovered as a recent refugee on Legion World, and is mysteriously attacked by magical creatures. Soon, every LMBer on Legion World is drawn into the fray, as Cobalt Kid and Iron Rat desperately attempt to learn of his origins, and what any LMBers may know that could help them. LMB Cadet Esk further complicates things, as her visions of the future show a horrible future for the LMB 5 years after they disband, and she dreams that the cause of their disbanding is the boy Elagabolus himself. Iron Rat is able to learn through confrontations with an evil creature named Jocelyn Moonstar and an immensely powerful entity known as the Devourer of Children, that Elagabolus is a magical center point in the galaxy, something that only occurs every thousand years or so. A dark wizard Septimus, who fears the world so much he would see it destroyed, as become aware of Elagabolus’ presence and hopes to use the boy create the destruction of the world. Legion World then undergoes a series of attacks by Septimus’ agents, including a vampire named Severus who is destroyed by Lash Lad, and a creature called ‘The Forsaken Bard’, who terrifyingly kills over twenty innocents before he is destroyed and his bones are sealed away. The new girlfriend of Invisible Brainiac, a girl named Sarah from Café Cramer, finds herself in danger, and her sister Anne, who is on a date with Cobalt Kid, is almost killed. In an attempt to save Elagabolus, Cobalt Kid is almost killed, until Elagabolus uses his power to heal to save him—and in doing so, transfers this power to Cobalt Kid, leaving himself with only his opposite powers of destruction, thus fulfilling Esk’s prophecy that he has the power of destruction. Fearing for future safety of Legion World, the LMB Founders, Legion World Founders and current leaders gather for a special conference to decide his fate, where Cobalt Kid and Iron Rat offer to take the boy far away from Legion World and discover his origins and the origins of Septimus, and possibly defeat the mage. A small band is then decided to undertake this task, including Lash Lad, LardLad, Arachne, and Grey Birdboy, although they are unknowingly joined by Invisible Brainiac, who feels he too should be on the quest. The LMBers leave in secret with Elagabolus on this journey. note- this is a Onevision written by Cobalt Kid
- Beagle Boy returns to active duty in the LMB, and rejoins them on Legion World, to the delight of old and new LMBer alike.
- Stu, in a final act before leaving on his quest, creates “Stu’s Repository of Lost Artifacts”, which houses a variety of important and powerful items the LMB have collected over the years. Sealed with a variety of enchantments and security cautions, it also contains the recently collected bones of the ‘Forsaken Bard’.
New Faces The constant influx of new LMBers on Legion World continues, as the LMB are pleased to see so many competent applicants to the LMB in light of many of their most powerful leaving. In the most impressive showing of new strength since the LMB’s first month, new members join the fold: Captain Dallas, Monkey-Eater Lad, Bedlam Lad, Kent Shakespeare, and Bicycle Repair Man. Sanity or Madness? also recommends his old friend and trusted ally, Actor Lad, who is also quickly inducted. The new members test their mettle quickly, having to battle Nads-Kicker Lass, Penis-Eradicator Lad, and Tharcock.
Dragons With seven of the most powerful LMBers away from Legion World, a new mission develops that falls into the hands of Numf-El, Sonnie Bloke, Marvin the Martian of the Brood, new member Captain Dallas, and Harbinger. What starts as a simple mission soon develops into a plot of intrigue, horror and absolute hilarity that spans for over a year! Kaant, Rody the Super-Rat, and Stacy Sheridan all weave their way into the madness. note- this is a Onevision written by Numf-El .
Journeys and Destinies The secret mission to take Elagabolus from Legion World begins, as Cobalt Kid, Iron Rat, LardLad, Grey Birdboy, Arachne and Lash Lad begin their mission. They soon learn that Invisible Brainiac had tagged along on the mission, feeling he belonged there. A series of adventures ensue, including a confrontation with the Elves of the Green, getting stuck between two armies engaged in the 3-Way War and having to battle Princess Tarina, the light-based powered leader and chief general of one of the armies, as well as other adventures. Finally, the LMBers find an ancient library that reveals the true nature of Elagabolus and the history of Septimus, forcing a final confrontation with the dark wizard, as he tortures and dissects the deep emotions of each LMBer. In the final battle, it is Elagabolus who destroys Septimus with his destructive power, thus cementing Septimus’ victory in getting Elagabolus to use his powers for evil and destructive purposes, in hopes that he will one day destroy the world. The LMBers attempt to find Elagabolus as the dust clears, but are unable to locate the boy, feeling that the guilt of his actions will overwhelm him. Considering this mission a failure, the LMBers return to Legion World, although Cobalt Kid secretly informs LardLad that during the confusion, he was able to use Septimus’ power to travel back in time to the point that Space Tart was dying, and rescue her from the entropy that consumed her. Space Tart’s memory is blank, but Cobalt knows she is alive, and he leaves her in the care of a monastery, hoping one day she will return. Knowing he cheated death in saving her, he begins to understand that in terms of a cosmic balance, he may have indirectly help cause Elagabolus to move towards his more destructive nature. this is a Onevision written by Cobalt Kid
The Festive Five Two new LMBers join the active roster on Legion World, Magnetic Kid and Condo, who both receive an endorsement from Varalent. Soon, the young LMBers are joined by Cobalt Kid, Invisible Brainiac and Super Lad Kid, three other young LMBers that enjoy partying, and the five of them begin throwing humungous bashes at Vee’s Varitable Villa, specifically during times that Varalent, Fat Cramer, Faraway Lad and others are trying to relax. Varalent dubs them “The Festive Five”.
- At this point, the events in “The All-New, not so Different LMB Tag Thread” take place.
Trying times for Alt IDs With the resignation of Mantis and Kara in the LMB, and the prominence on Legion World of alt IDs such as Thora, Dr. Mayavale and The Royal Inquisitor, many worried about how Alt IDs were seen by the public at large. Many Alt IDs continued to look towards Space Ranger as a genuine central figure in Alt ID culture and in the future of Alt IDs on Legion World. Many Alt IDs also continued to feel as if they were considered a second class of citizens. Many prominent LMBers, including Eryk Davis Ester and Cobalt Kid, worked hard to make sure these feelings were acknowledged and solutions could be solved. By the end of Stu’s term as LMB Leader, Space Ranger truly stood as a leader among this newer generation of Alt IDs.
Interview with a Puppy In light of the recent attempt to go evil by Piddlin’ Pup, many LMBers felt it necessary to follow up strongly on this issue and see if the lovable puppy could be restored to his good self. Lucien Lad, Shark Lad, Faraway Lad and, of course, Beagle Boy journeyed to the Psychiatric Ward for Dangerous and Evil Pets, and attempted to enter the mind of the tortured puppy.
- Security Officers Emerald Empress, Super Lad Kid, Shark Lad, Invisible Brainiac, Arachne and Blockade Boy continue to investigate the whereabouts of the Royal Inquisitor and Brainiac4, as well as the true intentions of Dr. Mayavale and Thora of Taltar. Cobalt Kid and Space Ranger continue to oversee all things involving their office.
- Leap Year Lass continues to explore the mystical art of Anagrams, and makes a startling discovery, as she understands that ‘Durla’ is an anagram of ‘U Lard’. This questions the very nature of LardLad, which has been an ongoing issue among the LMB, as it leads one to believe that a possible Durlan-like nature of Lardy, meaning that he is more a force than just one specific entity, could answer some long-standing questions concerning Lardy and his connections to Eryk Davis Ester, Pornis and Lucifer Lass.
- Kent Shakespeare impresses many of the LMBers with his wit and his quick rise to the role of prominent LMBer. He joins Deputy Leader He Who Wanders, Kid Prime and Princess Crujectra on a peace tour of the universe, to promote unity in light of the Barbarian Invasions and Terran Secession in recent history.
- The armies of the Triumvirate continue to crush the Barbarian armies throughout the galaxy, to restore borders to what they once were, and explore areas of space previously untouched. The steady flow of profit this creates leads to the Triumvirs continuing to beautify Legion World, such as through EDE's Super Playground of Space. Further, Sketch Lad continues to use his unique abilities to ensure that the growing capital city does not lose site of its beauty. All construction of Legion World is overseen by Nightcrawler and Lightning Lad, as well as Saturn Girl, whose sharp mind is able to act as a final say on things.
- Princess Crujectra begins using the codename Spellbinder during LMB missions.
- Portfolio Boy continues to monitor and tabulate involvement on Legion World, in order to understand patterns of activity in new theoretical ways. He also begins to flirt with the idea of taking on other aliases.
Mutiny of the LMBers While on a space-mission, the LMBers find themselves at odds with mission leader Poverty Lad, who appears to be losing his mind. After he tries to abandon them at a planet with giant venus flytraps and evil gay unicorns, they must use their various powers to escape, find a space-ship and then find the truth about what has happened to Poverty Lad. Lightning Lad, Sanity or Madness?, Actor Lad, Ultra-Matt, Saturn Girl, Doctor One, Monkey-Eater Lad, Minesurfer and Icefyre are finally able to accomplish this, as they learn that Poverty Lad is actually succumbing to space-fatigue.
Different sides of Different Coins In an odd set of circumstances, Matlock and Umber are the only two LMBers left guarding Repository of Lose Artifacts, after the LMB has been warned that at midnight a space-thief will strike to steal it. The old school hero Matlock and the young LMBer Umber are able to overcome their differences in crime-fighting tactics to work together, in uncovering who their enemy is: Dip-Thong, the space-thief who holds a grudge against Eryk Davis Ester.
- Stu takes the form of a monkey for a brief period of time. His continuing experiments with form-changing lead him to further acknowledge the fact that spells can be castfaster and easier when in the form of an animal or beast.
- Cobalt Kid undertakes a secret security mission to save missing LMBer Dev-Em, whose former time in the spy world have led him into a variety of risky, but secret situations. After returning to the fold and asked what brought him back, he coins the phrase “I Blame Cobie”.
- Warning the LMB to respect and care for his fragile psyche, Lash Lad is surprised to see support groups for Lash's Fragile Psychespring up. Leap Year Lass, however, continues to chastise him, specifically for his unusual fear of buying stamps.
- Krypto the Superdog journeys to Legion World and spends a brief period among its inhabitants.
- Bedlam Lad and Awkward Pause Boy decrease their status on the active roster at this point, although they appear sporadically from this point forward.
Exit Shark Lad Comfortable that he could deal with the high pressure lifestyle of the LMB, while not succumbing to his savage nature, Shark Lad contemplates what it would be like to develop a life outside of the LMB and outside of being evil. He focuses more on his passion for psychology and announces to the LMB that he is going to decrease his status from an active LMBer to a reservist.
note- At this point, the events of the Dark Stu Saga begin to take place, and all further anecdotes will be covered in that section.
[ March 08, 2006, 07:12 AM: Message edited by: Cobalt Kid ]
From: If you don't want my peaches, honey... | Registered: Sep 2003
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posted
Year Five: StuRat’s Term Part VI: The Dark Stu Saga
Real History At the end of Stu’s term as leader, Legion World and the LMB experienced its first absolute mega event in the form of the “Dark Stu Saga”. It cannot be stressed just how large and all-encompassing this event was throughout the six to seven weeks that it lasted. The basic story, which will be revealed in the ‘In Continuity’ part of this section, revolved around the current LMB leader, Stu (aka Iron Rat) becoming more and more tyrannical, until Legion World itself became under martial law and the LMB became resistance fighters against their former leader.
Throughout these weeks, a growing number of posters became actively involved in the saga. Both longtime posters with the LMB and Legion World, as well as newer posters became embroiled in the every day activities. Most remarkable however, was the number of posters who had previously not been a part of such role-playing type drama that decided to join in on the fun.
In addition to this, many other things marked the Dark Stu Saga as something that was very different than everything that had gone before. It was not a tag-team type story, but yet it held an impressive continuity that made it a very coherent and easy storyline to follow. Further, the overall story was seen in a variety of threads, which included many new ones, as well as the longer more traditional ones that had become a part of the Mission Monitor Board (i.e. Kid Prime’s Room, Vee’s Varitable Villa, Cobalt’s Security Office, etc.).
The Dark Stu Saga came at a time when Legion World was growing and changing again. The board had reached a point where, although it was still new in relative terms, that newness began to fade and a semblance of status quo began to take hold. The Dark Stu Saga effectively disrupted that sense of status quo and once again showed how energetic and vitalized things still were (not a revitalization of the board, but more of a ‘taking it up another notch’). The growing friendships and camaraderie felt throughout the board, as well as the openness to new members, grew in leaps and bounds by this event.
The Saga had become so prevalent that there was a tremendous amount of activity every single day. There were a variety of subplots and side stories, each one connecting to the main story and interweaving through each other.
This Saga also showed how the various functions of the board itself could be used to further along stories, as avatars were changed, names altered, signatures and graemlins used to express the current mood and atmosphere, etc. It was truly a board-wide event and one that is remembered fondly by those who were a part of it.
In Continuity
Week One Shortly after being elected leader, Stu begins constructing a mansion to govern Legion World. While this was never un-ordinary, it was used against him as propaganda when it appeared that he was a tyrant.
Stu announces that he will not step down at the end of his term and will reign as leader for 70 years.
Stu begins referring to himself as the "Much-Beloved Stu". Later, he begins calling himself "His Imperial Majesty Stu".
Suddenly, Stu is one day made moderator of every forum on Legion World. Suddenly, his government is able to touch every aspect of Legion World life.
During this week, it appears that Legion World is exceptionally quiet. Many members had not been seen for days or even weeks, including: Icefyre, Harbinger, Shark Lad, Space Ranger, Abin Quank, Lash, Teeds, Super Lad Kid, and a whole slew of others. Recently, Arachne and Invisible Brainiac had not been around either. Thus, the only Security Officer around for any period of time was the chief, Cobalt Kid.
Upon learning of Stu's new status as moderator in every forum, Fat Cramer begins trying to figure out what is happening. She enlists her brother, Stoopid Cat. She then makes a secret complaint to the Office of Security.
Cobalt Kid receives the message and offer to protect both her and Stoopid Cat, fearing that a new surge of institutional racism against cats might take affect now that Stu has gripped Legion World tightly.
Almost immediately, the Royal Inquisitor comes out of hiding and offers his services to Stu.
Fat Cramer investigates deeper into Legion World, attempting to learn of all of the missing LWers. She and Cobalt Kid continue to conspire, trying to learn the truth.
Stu acts as if nothing is happening, unaware that he has scared Legion World into a terror. He assumes that all is normal, and doesn't yet realize that his friends are acting different.
Giant Squid, a reporter on Legion World, begins standing outside of Stu's mansion, demanding an interview with the tyrant. He promises that he will not move.
Kid Prime resigns from Stu's administration, admitting that he is not comfortable with the new direction Stu has taken.
Things begin to feel more dangerous on Legion World. Nightcrawler is not seen for days...
Week Two The Royal Inquisitor begins making announcements that he supports Stu's takeover of Legion World and then offers to work for him in his government.
Fat Cramer and Cobalt Kid continue to investigate, and try to rally other Legion Worlders.
Fat Cramer beings worrying about the safety of Jinx, the feline in the Stu administration.
Quilet, Esq., the main source of law on Legion World attempts to maintain a lawful society, and warns all parties to stand down.
Giant Squid continues reporting outside of Stu's mansion, although Stu never talks to him.
STUbot #128 becomes the newest entity to arrive on Legion World. This alarms many Legion Worlders. To make things worse, the Robot begins demanding that all LWers submit to the will of Stu.
Cobalt Kid moves out of Stu's mansion, and many Legion Worlders refuse to enter it, including Spellbinder and Fat Cramer.
Kid Prime begins making rounds around Legion World, searching for an item. He sneaks into Stu's mansion while the STUbot is engaged in a confrontation and finds the item he is looking for.
The STUbots inform the Royal Inquisitor that he has a job working for Stu's government, as the new Chief of Security. Cobalt Kid warns the Inquisitor that this is not legal, since he is Security Chief for life and cannot be removed by the Legion World leader. Quislet, Esq. tries to sort out the legal matters.
While making rounds on Legion World, Cobalt Kid bumps into Kid Prime and they enjoy a drink at SHAKES. While drinking, Kid Prime is suddenly snatched out of the bar through a portal and dragged off to parts unknown.
The Royal Inquisitor begins threatening Giant Squid, who continues to report outside Stu's mansion. Quislet, Esq. warns him against touching the reporter.
STUbot #128 begins making demands on Legion World for Stu. Semi-Transparent Fellow tells him that he is not allowed in SHAKES. The STUbot then informs Legion World that prohibition is now in affect and that selling alcohol in illegal. Quislet responds by telling the robot that alcohol isn't actually sold at SHAKES, and that since drinks are for free, SHAKES can remain open.
Lightning Lad and Outdoor Miner begin searching for Kid Prime. They come across the STUbot, get engaged in a confrontation, and Lightning Lad destroys STUbot #128.
Quickly, STUbot #129 enters Legion World. It soon becomes apparent that there is a massive amount of STUbots in waiting.
Sanity or Madness? begins questioning the actions of Stu and his robots. He unleashes Circuit Breaker, a robot destroying beast, on them. It does its job, and destroys many STUbots. However, it is also captured and joins Kid Prime.
Sanity or Madness?, Outdoor Miner and Lightning Lad continue searching for Kid Prime, and SoM? is able to rescue Circuit Breaker. However, forces work against Kid Prime and keep him in his lonely corner of hell.
Eryk Davis Ester, worried about the now full-fledged tyranny of Stu, contacts Cobalt Kid and proposes that they resurrect the Triumvirate. Cobalt agrees and contacts his fellow Triumvir, Greybird. The three Triumvirs then decided to begin mobilizing their armies and call on them to be ready to come to Legion World if necessary and fight the forces of Stu.
Fat Cramer, Cobalt Kid and others begin taking up residence at Spellbinder's Psyonian Embassy to make sure they are protected.
The Royal Inquisitor continues to threaten Giant Squid, as well as many other citizens of Legion World, specifically the Emerald Empress, Cobalt Kid, Varalent and Quislet, Esq.
Varalent resigns as Stu's Chief of Staff, disgusted by the tyranny he sees. He makes a public speech denouncing Stu.
Varalent ventures into Stu's mansion and rescues Jinx in a special mission. He takes the feline back to his Villa to make sure she’s alright.
Stu announces that he needs a Queen to rule as dictator. Winema Wazzo, ever the opportunist, begins seducing Stu and offers to join him. The two apparently begin to fall for one another, and Stu takes Winema as his consort. Many LMBers and citizens of Legion World are disgusted, and Winema's unpopularity only brings more people to begin questioning Stu.
The STUbots announce that Legion World is under Martial Law.
[ March 08, 2006, 08:00 AM: Message edited by: Cobalt Kid ]
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